What's Your Biggest Fear About Women?

[Itzonator]

I can be intimidated a bit by their beauty. It's really my own self esteem issues deep from my childhood psyche but for some reason I don't feel like I can land a "trophy wife" or goddess. I have had relationships with pretty women but they were on my midland economic level. Unless one of my projects really succeeds and I can afford whatever I want, I will probably tend to dismiss the idea of say, having a Scarlet Johansen to hatch my nose.

 

So you believe getting beautiful women can be determined by how deep is your pocket? But you recognize that there is an issue from your childhood which provoked you to see the situation in that way as an adult (assumed constraint).

[Eoweniel]

Wow, you've developed entire system on tracking people online. Very creative way to find the person you really want in a relationship. Especially from a woman's perspective. Men use online dating from a little different twist, but more or less the idea is the same - to get a date.

 

Why would people get scared from the online world and do things in secret?

 

 

Really? Men do online dating differently? I'm actually curious how they do it now haha.

 

Uhm... Well, some people just don't like the idea of someone being able to google their parents' name or address or whatever, is what I meant. I'm not like that, but I know there are some people who are. Seems to be more common among girls though. Silly fears of stalkers (tcheah right!)

 

Ooh, I forgot another thing. Dating sites = bad idea. I've found that the best people I've found online and the most genuine ones, are ones I've accidentally stumbled upon and started talking to. I guess that saying "Don't look for love, let love find YOU" holds a lot of truth.

Plus, it's less likely that someone's not being genuine with you if you meet via a different community (with some purpose other than dating/hooking up) or an online game such as WoW, because people are there for different reasons. No one's playing that game just to lie to you.

Sure, there are creeps EVERYWHERE, so caution still best be used... But yeah.

[Itzonator]

So far I've done absolutely terrible with women. My biggest fear is not being able to figure out what actually makes a girl like a guy. 28 years old and it still hasn't clicked for me.

 

Besides that, my most current fear is getting stuck in the friendzone. It's happened way too many times. I've now gotten to the point where I don't keep female friends. If a girl rejects me, I delete her number and find a new girl. No more wasting time and energy on a girl I'm never going to be with.

 

 

Your concerns are reasonable. Friend zone can be a real frustration, especially if you have intentions for something more ... intimate.

 

So you do not know what make women tick -- to get involved in a relationship & you can enjoy the process?

 

Why instead, you do not try to figure what you are looking for. And at all means what it will take to get it?

 

What makes women tick is the flirting process. It is kind of a pre-foreplay And it is fun. Being too serious is quite predictable. So the unpredictability is what make things interesting. Of course, I am generalizing here, but emotions are the key here. When you create the flirting environment, she will go through your slippery slide without even realizing it -- just can't help it.

[Morals]

My biggest fear of women is my lack of keeping their interest.

 

I've often had opportunities (Great opportunities) to approach women and get something going; especially since I knew there was interest on their end--but I always think even if I'm able to gain their interest, eventually they'll be able to see me for who I really am--which is someone who's boring, not very social, and not very interesting.

 

Earlier in my life, I never had many issues generating interest--but always had problems keeping the interest flowing. I hate that about myself and it makes me afraid to even attempt to get a woman.

 

This is one of my fears too. While I have done alot of stuff, been to a decent amount of places. I tend to assume that my life is below normal. Meaning boring. I tend to believe that because I'm much more into spending some time online that all of my other activities are negated by this negative stigma associated with spending time online.

 

This stems directly from the stereotyping of people who spend time playing "games" as being anti-social. And the problem is exacerbated by the fact that once you admit to it, even if it was a past hobby, people cling to that like it's your only interest. They partition you into a certain category, and despite the fact that you may be more interesting then this person, they tend to only consider you as that type.

 

This in turn causes them to not include you into their social circle if they didn't "categorize" you favorably. Hence your own social circle really doesn't get bigger.

 

That all of them will eventually turn on a man and fall out of love with him? I hope I am wrong about this but some things I hear about send chills up my spine.

 

This is another fear of mine. Partly because it happened to me. Dating a girl for 9 months, and then I noticed contact start dropping off. I stopped contacting her because I figured maybe she was still playing games. Looked on facebook, and she had changed her status to in a relationship with another guy. Out of nowhere. Deleted her and moved on. I got over her, but it still hurt.

 

So far I've done absolutely terrible with women. My biggest fear is not being able to figure out what actually makes a girl like a guy. 28 years old and it still hasn't clicked for me.

 

Besides that, my most current fear is getting stuck in the friendzone. It's happened way too many times. I've now gotten to the point where I don't keep female friends. If a girl rejects me, I delete her number and find a new girl. No more wasting time and energy on a girl I'm never going to be with.

 

See, I see the friendzone as a double edged sword. It's not bad. Sure people here will tell you it's bad. But the problem with the friendzone is that USUALLY you end up being the one who doesn't want to be in the friendzone, wanting to be more with the girl...I view the friendzone as a place girls put guys on the "back burner". They are *possible* boyfriends if their current interest falls to the side.

 

Friends are usually attracted to their friends for some reason or another, either looks, personality, charisma, whatever. There is attraction there. That's what drives for us to make friends. With different sexes it's just amplified.

 

I view friends as friends. Sometimes feelings will develop for someone as you get to know them. That's natural, the more you get to know them, the more attracted you become to them. The thing is, dealing with this in a mature manner. They (at that time) may not be attracted to you. If you can handle this, then you can continue to be a friend. However, if you can't, sometimes that's when you lose friends.

 

Losing friends is a two way street. You never lose friends because of one person's actions, it's a combined effort. One person wants to let go, the other person stops holding on. Losing friends only happens if both parties aren't mature and can't handle the truth.

[Art_Critic]

Isn't it really a fear of rejection rather than a fear of women ?

[Green]

For the longest time I would littleraly freeze up around women. I acted like a real jack ass. Women terefied me because I gave them to much power by letting REJECTION rule my life. I was under the crazy notion that if I asked a girl out and she said NO it was the end for me... that my family and friends would dis own me. Even worse then that I felt like if I ever got a gf she would just leave me.

 

Learning not to care what WOMEN think of you is truely empowering and allows you to take the PUSSY OFF THE PEDESTAL and see them for the people they are no matter how pretty and great yet still with their flaws and insecurities of their own.

 

Only when you learn not to fear REJECTION and WOMEN can you have a propper relationship... well even then bad things can happen but you are a step closer atleast.