Confused728 Posted June 13, 2010 Posted June 13, 2010 (edited) Yesterday I went out to an event and my ex was there. I ignored him. As you know I posted my situation here months ago. We started talking again but weren't together. I haven't seen him since February. But he has text me since and called me, saying that he compares everyone to me, and that he missed me and got nervos i wasn't going to speak to him ever again and on and on. So we been texting and i asked him to not contact me or text me again and if he ever seen me out not to come up and talk to me. So this got put to the test yesterday. I saw him and did nothing, and he didn't say anything but look disturbed and i know its going to hurt him. I feel kind of bad.. what does everyone think about this.. BTW he was with his usual drug friends that we fought about before.. A lepaord never changes its spots... Oh BTW... i was reading another post here that mentioned cocaine symptoms, and one i failed to mention before was that my ex had to have ice coffee two times a day.. and he always needed one late in the afternoon he woudl go out of his way to make sure he had it. here my original post if u want to catch up on it http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t206477/ O Edited June 13, 2010 by Confused728
Author Confused728 Posted June 14, 2010 Author Posted June 14, 2010 Does anyone have any advice i really need it!
Jemini Posted June 14, 2010 Posted June 14, 2010 I don't know if this helps but I broke up with my partner of 9yrs because of drugs. He'd always smoked a bit of weed and taken cocaine socially but after a family crisis he turned to cocaine heavily. I got him counselling and tried to get him off it and it worked but I could never trust him. We split up last August because he was unfaithful and then he started using heroin. Nearly a year down the line he has lost everything. He lost a very secure job and then numerous others after that. He was evicted from his flat and had to live on the street and all the time he was asking me for help which made me feel guilty. Addiction is a disease. Cocaine is psychologically addictive. Heroin is physically addictive, both are difficult to quit and both cost a lot of money. I think you are doing the right thing in ignoring him. You don't want to be dragged down with him. Addicts are very dependant on other people and exceptionally manipulative - get out now before he asks for money, you can never trust an addict!!
Author Confused728 Posted June 14, 2010 Author Posted June 14, 2010 how do they become so manipulative? I have even found out more stuff since we broke up and i realize he manipulated me more than i thought. I actually confronted him a few months ago when i found somthing out he had cheated on me, i had hard evidence and didnt show him at first. when i told him about it he laughed and tried to make it seem a figment of my imagination, then i showed him the email i found and he was like, its not what u think. But drugs are the main reason of what split us up. When i found that email we werent really a couple or back together, just talking. but it still hurt. but i seen him with his drug friends this weekend.. i dont understand why i still have a hard time beliving he is using drugs..maybe i just dont wanna belive it
Jemini Posted June 14, 2010 Posted June 14, 2010 My ex told so many lies especially if he needed money. He'd regularly need a couple of hundred pounds £ and when I refused he'd start getting upset even to the point of crying. He;d say some dealer was going to break his legs or threaten me so I gave in and gave it to him. I found out later that it was all lies. His dealer was his "friend". I constantly bailed him out. He used to lie about when and where he took the drugs, who it got them from, where he was, who he was with and he denied taking them for so long. God knows how I stuck it out so long. You believe him because you love him - don't get sucked in to that world. My ex knows exactly which buttons to push to get my sympathy but I had to take a stand and say enough's enough. Now I look at him and just think he's pathetic and it took him having to live on the streets to start sorting his life out. Now I don't believe he really wanted me, he wanted a mother to look after him and I can't do that any more. I'm not wasting my life too and you shouldn't either, you're worth more than that!!
Author Confused728 Posted June 14, 2010 Author Posted June 14, 2010 my ex has a good job and never asked me for money but he works to jobs one that pays well and never seems to have money. but he usually always goes to work. and for most party pays his rent but he lives in a house owned by him and his family.
Author Confused728 Posted June 15, 2010 Author Posted June 15, 2010 i cant belive this i feel awful and feel like im back at square one and am starting to miss him and i was doing great
romango Posted June 16, 2010 Posted June 16, 2010 i cant belive this i feel awful and feel like im back at square one and am starting to miss him and i was doing great It sounds like you're an "addict" too.
cavedweller Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 Confused, He won't change..You need to forget him and move on with your life.
Author Confused728 Posted July 2, 2010 Author Posted July 2, 2010 Ok i ran into my ex again today, i ignored him again. I am not doing it to be mean but I just don't want him saying stuff to me that will set me back. i ignored him.. he doesn't approach me because i told him before i didn't want him to. Of course he was with his drug addict friends
Author Confused728 Posted July 4, 2010 Author Posted July 4, 2010 I'm really feeling stressed out about him today for some reason.. I don't know why after all these months these feelings are coming back. I will not break NC though.. but its tough lately why? I feel angry all over again.. like its really bothering me
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