pj123 Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Before I start this I want to say whether or not I end up with the other girl I do want to end it with my girlfriend as I have thought about it for months. I am looking for advice on first how to break up with her although I know she still loves me but I do not have the same feeling anymore. I would like to know how to best way to break it off peacefully so that I can still be friends with my firend / her best friend. I am going to post this kind of as a point by point as putting stories together are a weak point for me. I will explain the situation. I will call my girlfriend Jane and her friend Jill for easiness. First I met Jill about a year before I met my girlfriend. She was dating my best friend and roomate at the time. She broke up with him and I have stopped talking to him for over a year now because he became a drug addict and was stealing from me. Jill and I have and continue to be great friends. She finds me just as interesting as I find her. We are both at the same intelligence level and have the same sense of humor. We love each others company and hangout often even while my girlfriend is not around. We can spend days at a time together and never get tired of each other. No matter what I talk to her about whether it be my extreme love of sports (which my girlfriend can't figure out after all this time) or my tech geekiness she is always interested. In turn I am interested to hear everything she says from catty gossip to her thoughts on things in the news. Now Jane on the other hand, we have not been getting along very well for quite some months now. We met because she was always hanging out with me my best friend and jill. It kind of just fell into place that we would date each other as Jane and Jill were inseperable at the time. Jane is not the smartest girl on the block which makes conversation hard for me as I am a IT and economy major so I am very news oriented and tech inclined. I have trouble speaking to her so I pretty much just listen to all her stories which I get very bored of because there is only so much catty gossip I can handle. She is a very moody person and always has been but has lately tried my patience. She will get angry at me no matter what I have to say and no matter what we do has to be perfect or she will have had a terrible time. She is impossible to please and every joke I make has to be explained to her so its very hard to get a genuine laugh out of her. I have been trying to make it work but for the past few months I have just been discouraged. Also she gives me absolutely no space and gets upset when I want to go do something with the guys. Although she does all these things she loves me to death but has some sort of ****ed up way of showing it. Now Jill has in the past admitted to liking me more than just a friend but I have never thought of her that way because one she was my best friends girl and two because even though I have had the opportunities to cheat I am 100% faithful to my girlfriend. This has recently changed. My girlfriend ha sbeen away alot in the past month and I have spent alot of time with Jill. I hav enot been happy for months as I work 60 hours aweek and when I come home I come home to bitchiness. That has changed for me. Spending time with Jill has lifted my mood so high and we get along so well. We stay up to the wee hours of the night all the time just talking and laughing. Something I can't do with Jane. Suddenly I have realized I have feelings for Jill more than just friendship. I have waited on it for a couple weeks to see if that feeling would die down but it has not it has only grown stronger as my girlfriend has been back and we still cannot get along. I think that I have always had these feelings for Jill but I have surpressed them and disregarded them and not addressed them. So what I want to ask is 1 How do I break up with my girlfriend without sending her into some sort of depression. She is extremely attached and the smallest fight makes her cry for hours. She very emotional. How do I bring it up? When to I bring it up? What should I say? I would like to maybestill be friends with her but I see that may be impossible after dating for 2 and a half years. 2 How do I ensure this won't cause drama between me and Jill. I would not want to lose her as a friend at the very least and possibly maybe I would like to start dating her. But the main thing is I do not want to lose her whether or not she is my girlfriend. she is my favorite person to be with and I don't know what i would do without her. Just thought this may be important there is a much higher physical attraction to Jill as well but that does not sway my thinking. And thats about it. If I left anything important out just ask. Sorry for the long read and I appreciate any advice.
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