tigressA Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I had a guy say this to me just a little while ago, followed by "...if you can pencil me in we should hang out sometime." I messaged him online a few days ago and we've talked a good amount since then, including phone time. We have tentative plans to meet on Sunday. I was thinking about what he said as a general thing, not necessarily connected to him. I've had other guys say similar things to me, and while it's sweet in a way--indicating that I'm desirable--it also rings a little insecure to me, as though they're not confident enough to believe that I'd want to make room for them among "all the others". The fact that this guy said that is in no way a dealbreaker, of course. I do like him so far; he's funny, nice and of course rather good-looking (to me, anyway). I just wonder--ladies, have you had guys say that sort of thing to you? What do you think about it? Guys, what makes you want to say that sort of thing to a girl you're asking out?
TheBigQuestion Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I generally don't say this kind of stuff, unless we've hung out a few times already. Even then, it just comes across as unnecessary.
aerogurl87 Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Never really had a guy say something like that to me. Although I did have one guy I was friends with (who I found out liked me as more than a friend) ask me "what are you doing this weekend?" I said "nothing, why?" Then he said "Yes you are, your going to be with me in Florida this weekend." That caught me off guard until he said "check your email for your flight info and I'll see you tomorrow afternoon." One of the best pick up lines ever.
Cracker Jack Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Yeah, I've said the same a few times--and I did because I didn't want to seem "forceful", if that makes sense. I was trying to let her know I wanted to take her out, but I also was trying to let her know that if she had other, more important things on her plate, I'd understand if she didn't have the time. I guess it could be attributed to not having enough confidence in the woman being available, but I mainly said it out of personal courtesy. I just didn't want to seem like I was hassling her to go out. I dunno.
Author tigressA Posted June 12, 2010 Author Posted June 12, 2010 Never really had a guy say something like that to me. Although I did have one guy I was friends with (who I found out liked me as more than a friend) ask me "what are you doing this weekend?" I said "nothing, why?" Then he said "Yes you are, your going to be with me in Florida this weekend." That caught me off guard until he said "check your email for your flight info and I'll see you tomorrow afternoon." One of the best pick up lines ever. That's so awesome! I would probably swoon a little. Did you actually go?
Feelin Frisky Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 It's a tad corny but apparently effective. I can't see myself saying something like that. Perhaps I should.
txsilkysmoothe Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I've had something similar said to me. In a couple of cases it became apparent the men were attempting to discover if I was dating other men without actually asking me.
Ruby Slippers Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I've had something similar said to me. In a couple of cases it became apparent the men were attempting to discover if I was dating other men without actually asking me. Yes, I've heard it, too, and in a few cases, I think the guy was trying to get a read on the competition. In the other cases, it came across as him just saying something sweet. I love the sweet talk, as long as it's not too over the top or obviously fake, so I kinda liked it.
xpaperxcutx Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Sure it may sound somewhat immature, but at least it's better than something cocky. I had alot of guys emailing me out of the blue telling me to go see them when I don't even know who they are. T, I think it's just nerves before a date. Don't look too much into it until you've actually met the guy in person. Maybe he's just a sweetheart in real life.
stepka Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I've heard it too, but I think it could be one of 4 reasons: 1. He's insecure. 2. He's angling to find out how much competition. 3. He's being ironic. 4. He's giving a very sweet compliment. I prefer to think it's this.
Confusedalways Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I'm neutral about it. It's definitely awkward to respond to.... but at least it isn't cocky? I don't know. I wouldn't really pass negative or positive judgment on someone for using it.
Choboto Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 he jsut thinks your so pretty/awesome in general that you must already have had a ton of guys ask you out already and is just letting you know he thinks your awesome indirectly and wants to go out. doesn't mean hes insecure....girls complaint about a guy being to pushy, hes tryin not to be pushy.
SadandConfusedWA Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I have heard it too and I like it I prefer my men a little bit on the insecure side rather than on the cocky side. This statement is flattering to me. Also something like "I would really like a serious exclusive relationship with you but I really hope that this doesn't scare you off and make you run for the hills" *rambles on* I love it.
SadandConfusedWA Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Just want to add that *sometimes* this is the line that players use.
Crazy Magnet Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 To me it comes across as the guy trying to figure out if you are seeing anyone else and how serious you may be with that someone else. I don't blame him for not being so direct in asking! I know I couldn't do it! lol
thegoodlife Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I've had something similar said to me. In a couple of cases it became apparent the men were attempting to discover if I was dating other men without actually asking me. Agreed. I've gotten that line quite a bit and that's been the general motive behind the comment, as well as giving a compliment all rolled into one.
Mr White Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 I had a guy say this to me just a little while ago, followed by "...if you can pencil me in we should hang out sometime." I messaged him online a few days ago and we've talked a good amount since then, including phone time. We have tentative plans to meet on Sunday. I was thinking about what he said as a general thing, not necessarily connected to him. I've had other guys say similar things to me, and while it's sweet in a way--indicating that I'm desirable--it also rings a little insecure to me, as though they're not confident enough to believe that I'd want to make room for them among "all the others". The fact that this guy said that is in no way a dealbreaker, of course. I do like him so far; he's funny, nice and of course rather good-looking (to me, anyway). I just wonder--ladies, have you had guys say that sort of thing to you? What do you think about it? Guys, what makes you want to say that sort of thing to a girl you're asking out? I'd say "I know your schedule is probably full of dates/shmates, and that's an unfortunate waste of your time, just sayin'. Instead, why don't you swing by Casa de'l senor Blanco for some real fun, margaritas, and pachangas? Ask my servant for the address and call me Big Daddy".
Author tigressA Posted June 12, 2010 Author Posted June 12, 2010 I'd say "I know your schedule is probably full of dates/shmates, and that's an unfortunate waste of your time, just sayin'. Instead, why don't you swing by Casa de'l senor Blanco for some real fun, margaritas, and pachangas? Ask my servant for the address and call me Big Daddy". :lmao: Interesting how a lot of people have said it's a way of sussing out competition. I'd find that factor a little weird coming from him since we haven't even met yet (I have been seeing someone else for a month or so but it's casual, no chance of anything serious). I just took it as a compliment; the whole exchange was really cute and funny. I'm looking forward to meeting him.
Crazy Magnet Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 :lmao: Interesting how a lot of people have said it's a way of sussing out competition. I'd find that factor a little weird coming from him since we haven't even met yet (I have been seeing someone else for a month or so but it's casual, no chance of anything serious). I just took it as a compliment; the whole exchange was really cute and funny. I'm looking forward to meeting him. I always find your dating life so interesting!! You definitely seem to know yourself very well and aren't afraid to put yourself out there which is no easy feat. And here's a bunny b/c you're cool. :bunny::bunny::bunny:
aerogurl87 Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 That's so awesome! I would probably swoon a little. Did you actually go? Haha yes I did, and to be honest I didn't believe him and thought he was pulling my leg till I checked my email and the actual airline's site and sure enough I had a plane ticket in my name for the weekend. :bunny:
Author tigressA Posted June 12, 2010 Author Posted June 12, 2010 I always find your dating life so interesting!! You definitely seem to know yourself very well and aren't afraid to put yourself out there which is no easy feat. And here's a bunny b/c you're cool. :bunny::bunny::bunny: Aw, thanks! Yeah, most of my dates/involvements via online dating were initiated by me--as in, I'd send the initial message. I'm not afraid to pursue guys I'm interested in, and it's worked really well for me. I'm like a walking billboard for female assertiveness.
Author tigressA Posted June 12, 2010 Author Posted June 12, 2010 Haha yes I did, and to be honest I didn't believe him and thought he was pulling my leg till I checked my email and the actual airline's site and sure enough I had a plane ticket in my name for the weekend. :bunny: Gaaaahhhh, that is soooo cool! He must've been totally smitten with you to do that!
Crazy Magnet Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Aw, thanks! Yeah, most of my dates/involvements via online dating were initiated by me--as in, I'd send the initial message. I'm not afraid to pursue guys I'm interested in, and it's worked really well for me. I'm like a walking billboard for female assertiveness. I found in online dating the matches were better when I pursued as well. I'm the one who suggested my now BF and I meet up first although he tells me he wrote it in his first email but didn't want to freak me out and deleted it. ha! I figure I know what I want so I might as well go after it! It's awesome that you've figured that out so young! I hope some sparks fly with this new guy!
aerogurl87 Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Gaaaahhhh, that is soooo cool! He must've been totally smitten with you to do that! Yeah he was, paid for everything while I was there too. Cooked me breakfast every morning, took me out to eat at nice restaraunts, the works. Too bad it didn't work out though, he had a penchant for being on his Blackberry at the most inconvenient times (like when we were in the middle of dinner) and I couldn't stomach that.
SadandConfusedWA Posted June 12, 2010 Posted June 12, 2010 Really? I singed up for online dating yesterday and have been waiting for guys to approach me (so far one actually e-mailed and seems keen). But I have see a few that seem cute maybe I should send them a "flirt"?
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