wingman2 Posted June 11, 2010 Posted June 11, 2010 In my last thread I talked about how my ex was eager to speak to me. Well today I asked if we were going to talk but she told me I wouldn't want to talk with her considering she's very mad/sad. Apparently something happened or she did something. All she said is that everything sucks right now, and she ****ed everything up, also that she hates everything. In all of my 3 and a half years of being with her I've never seen her so torn up. When I asked if there is something I can do she responded by telling me she misses me. I did the wrong thing by telling her I miss her too but at the time I just wanted to speak from my heart. She was shocked and asked me "seriously?" The entire time she thought I didn't care about herr. She then wanted to talk on instant messenger since she could't on the phone. I tried to give her good advice even though I didn't know what exactly happened and neither would she say anything. Eventually, not too long after she told me she'll just talk to me later. I was disappointed cause I felt like she didn't think I was of any help and that's why she didn't want to talk anymore even if she asked at first but perhaps she was just over emotional and just needed time to cool off. I messaged her an hour later asking if she's doing better but she said no. I then offered to talk on the phone later and she said she'd like that but only wanted to if I was home which I wasn't cause I was helping my sister move out of her apartment so I didn't get home till late. I tried calling several times but no answer, I did leave a message telling her if she's still awake she's free to call me. I know she's at her sister's place right now. I'm very worried about her, I've never seen her this miserable before and almost scared she'll hurt herself. My question is, is it right for me to help her and be there during this really tough time in her life? Or would it have been better if I hadn't so she can continue to miss me and know she can only receive my help when she's with me? Normally it would be the latter but I was just too concerned about her and also really curious about what happened.
northstar1 Posted June 11, 2010 Posted June 11, 2010 Wing She broke up with you. Now you are catering to her every emotional need and whim. Do you see the problem with that? She's not come back and said that she wants you back has she?You're so desperate for her attention, you are willing to allow her to dictate everything. I get that you feel for her, but it's not your problem anymore to be her support system. She has friends and family for that. Unless she is willing to sit down, tell you she made a mistake and do whatever it takes to get you back, she's wasting your time. She lost the right to your support when she broke up with you. Sorry it's h harsh, but it is the truth.
samspade Posted June 11, 2010 Posted June 11, 2010 Agree with northstar. Her problems are not yours, as she is no longer your girlfriend. Cut the Capt. Save-A-Ho routine and worry about your own sh#t. Quit asking your ex gf for permission to speak with her and then trying to solve her problems like you're about to offer her a spare tampon. You're absorbing her issues when you should be isolating yourself and getting over all of this. I'm willing to bet your intentions are suspect as you're probably trying to weasel back into her life because you have one-itis for her. Move on.
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