Girl wants to introduce me to the parents after 2 dates

[Bogo123]

Im a bit freaked out by this. I really like this girl, but isn't that moving a bit too fast? Should I bring it up to her or just go with the flow? She invited me to a bbq at her parents house.

[RedRussian]

Yes a bit too soon, i would look for "I Love You" within the first 2 weeks.

 

Listen to your Man Gut Bro, MG is almost always right on, it is a good filter of Crazy and God knows we need that filter.

 

Go if you must, but don't be physical with her in front of them, and it will also give you a chance to see from what kind of tree the apple you are dating.

[carhill]

A BBQ is a relaxing way to meet and great people. Much less 'official' than a more private and formal dinner-type occasion. My advice is to go with the flow and use it as a great opportunity to see if her family dynamic matches up with what *you* find healthy. In retrospect, I missed a lot of important information not paying attention to that.

 

BYOB or offer to bring something. Start conversations. Be proactive. Know your fire

[RedRussian]

Don't forget to bring a condom and let it fall on the ground near a grill when you take your wallet out to check something for show, so they can see what baller player you are and that their little girl is lucky to be with such ManMeat. Don't forget extra large ones for effect, Her Mom should love it.

[Ruby Slippers]

Way, way, way too fast.

[harmfulsweetz]

Maybe she just thought she'd invite you to a BBQ where her family happen to be at? It may not be because she expects to be official or serious yet, but she may have thought she was being nice inviting you.

[Confusedalways]

Did she actually say she wants you to meet her parents? Or was that secondary? There was 1 of 2 ways she had to have asked:

 

1. Do you want to come to a BBQ-- its actually at my parents.

2. Do you want to meet my parents?---they're having a BBQ.

 

1 is fine, 2 is freaky.

[rollafan89]

Maybe she was being nice, but I would just simply say no thank you to that... it's little too fast.

[carhill]

OP, if you decline, I'd suggest posing a conflict, meaning an unavoidable commitment intervenes. If you get into a 'too soon' debate, you probably will not like the outcome, presuming you wish to continue seeing her. However, if blunt honesty is your strength or if you're a smooth talker (I'm decidedly not), give a more direct approach a go

 

From my own circumstances, if I were to decline and the inevitable 'why?' was spoken, I'd likely share 'I'd love to come, but they're having a luncheon at mom's facility that I signed up for. I'm looking forward to the next time. Sounds like you'll have a blast.' Since there's lunch every day and I'm always signed up to visit, that's the truth, mostly. I learned these 'methods' from women.

[Mimolicious]

Unless you're 16 there shouldn't be such a fear factor to meet someone's family in such a laid-back setting like a BBQ. I mean, for all you know you are sweating it and making it out to be more important than she is.

 

Unless she introduces you as her "Futute Baby Daddy", I don't see an issue of you attending. Bring something, wear your best BBQ get-up and be polite. There is no second chance for a first impression. If you feel that the way she handles it at the BBQ makes you uncomfortable, then tone it down or cut her off and RUN FOREST RUN!

[that girl]

Are you sure this is a meet the parents BBQ? And by that I mean just you and her family in a formal "this is my boyfriend" kind of way?

 

If so, I think you can say that while you appreciate the offer, it is a bit too soon for you. I don't think you have to make a federal case about it because meeting the family might not be a big step in her family.

 

But my guess is that this is a big party type bbq with lots of people and low expectations. Since you're apprehensive, I would skip it, but I'm not even sure you need to explain why after 2 dates. Saying you have plans and suggesting a dinner another night is fine.

[Bogo123]

She never explicitly said "meet my parents" but I think that was the main intention. I decided to skip it, told her I had something important to do.

[Art_Critic]

During my dating years I have met parents as early as the first date..

Sometimes a woman might live with her parents or vise versa.

 

I have also introduced most of my dates throughout the years to my family as early as the first date as well..

 

I'm very close to my family and even work with some of them.. so if they come to my work they meet my family or back in the day when I was a big boater I kept my boat in my Step Mom's dock..

 

So if I took a girl out on the lake for some "stabbing in the cabin" then they met my SM first..

 

It may be too quick for some and not for others.. it really doesn't matter unless you tie meeting thr parents to exclusivity.. if you don't them go and have fun.

[EmeraldHeart]

OP, if you decline, I'd suggest posing a conflict, meaning an unavoidable commitment intervenes. If you get into a 'too soon' debate, you probably will not like the outcome, presuming you wish to continue seeing her. However, if blunt honesty is your strength or if you're a smooth talker (I'm decidedly not), give a more direct approach a go

 

I agree. The fella I am having issues with at the moment asked me to go to Sunday dinner at his mom's to meet her and some of his siblings within the first 2 weeks of dating. I felt overwhelmed by that and told him outright. He kept asking, every Sunday and then I said, ok...I will go if you would like me to. He asked if I was ready and I said yes seeing as he had just met my sister when picking me up and I felt more comfortable with the idea. I haven't yet been to his mom's and he hasn't asked me since I agreed to go.