DinoFace Posted June 9, 2010 Posted June 9, 2010 So one of my BEST friend (lets say Tim) told me he liked me about a month and a half ago. I had just started dating this guy, let's say Tom, and from what i knew, Tim only liked me a little. I've liked Tim for AGES, but I couldn't just dump Tom, especially knowing something might not even happen with Tim. So the whole time with Tom, I was miserable, Tom was a really bad boyfriend, and always thinking about Tim. He is so great. Cute, funny, nice, just pretty much perfect. Tim also kept constantly egging me on to break up with Tom. We'd hung out a few times while I was dating Tom. Lots of people noticed we liked each other. So on Friday me and Tim and my best friend, let's say Sally, all hung out. On Wednesday she had told Tim I liked him and he was happy, but bummed since I had a bf. We had so much fun, Tim was giving me piggy back rides and I felt so close and happy with him. Sally could tell how happy I was. On Saturday morning, I broke up with Tom, I was done, and I have liked Tim so much for so long and he obviously still liked me. I was so excited!! Tim and I went to a bonfire together and hung out the whole time and tickled and hugged and I wore his jacket and it was really sweet. Then he invited me to the movies on Sunday, I said yes, but then we couldn't go, so he just invited me to his house to watch movies. I said that was fine. We watched a movie downstairs on a pullout sofa, and I was tickling him and he was trying to take my phone and read my texts lol. Later he grabbed my hands and put his head on my shoulder and put his arms around my waist and kissed my hand and we were super snuggly and wrapped up in each other. For like two-three hours. Just laying together. I was so happy cuz I was so sure we would date, I mean obviously, look at all the signs! (HE initiated ALL cuddling) Then the next day at school he told me we weren't ever going to date. I cried and cried and cried He's also been saying things like "why is she so upset it doesnt make sense", he denies all our hand holding and cuddling, he says he wont date me cuz he likes this one chick too much, but he knows i dont care, and he was like oh she just wants in my pants but sally explained that i dont want that at ALL, i really like him for who he is cuz he really is the greatest guy ever.. anyways, and is just acting really dumb altogether. We're still friends and he still wants me to go to his party on thursday but wtf.. He said that ever since I dated Tom, the feelings just kind of went a way and he only likes me a little. But that doesnt make sense since he was ALL OVER ME. I'm still really upset by it and cried a bit today. The whole thing is really confusing.. I've liked him for so long and I felt so right being with him.. I don't understand.. He knows all my relationships have been ****, and I've been cheated on and pressured into doing things I don't want to. He also knows I was raped two years ago. So I'm not a bad person, but I've gone through so much bad shat, and I was so excited cuz I thought he would be the first guy I wouldnt get treated like shat with. I tried to talk to him to figure out all this crazyness but he got really awkward and didnt want to talk about it. Then later he just kept walking by me and I was finally like "Tim...." then started crying and he just walked away. He's mad and annoyed that I'm upset and it's not fair cuz he led me on BIG TIME. Does anyone have any idea what could be going on in his crazy boy mind? I'm stressed so bad I want things to go back to how they were cuz (not to sound cocky) but I am a GREAT girlfriend, and I know he'd be a great boyfriend and we'd be really happy together... I just want him to give me a chance atleast. Anyone have any idea?? I am so confused, I dont get this at all. Please help!
Yamaha Posted June 9, 2010 Posted June 9, 2010 It sounds like the old story of "once he could have you then he didn't want you", end of story. He's playing games and really doesn't sound like a very good friend, to me. I would re-evaluate your friendship and if you don't want just friends then make him an aquaintance and look for another guy.
Kang Posted June 9, 2010 Posted June 9, 2010 Well Tim sounds like he needs a swift kick in the balls to me. But you know... He could just be getting payback, you said he liked you BEFORE you started dating Tom, and WHILE you liked him no less.. Maybe he really does like you, but it sounds like he's teaching you a lesson to me. Take my advice with a grain of salt though, I'm a little off today.
Author DinoFace Posted June 9, 2010 Author Posted June 9, 2010 Well I guess.. I don't know if I should keep trying? Should I tell him how I feel? Then play hard to get? Or drop it completely? Do you think he still likes me? He says he likes me still, but just a little. He said that over the time of me dating Tom, he just kind of lost the feeling. (That one stung quite a bit..) I really did feel something special between us.. I can't just let it go like that when it could/would turn out amazing.
Kang Posted June 9, 2010 Posted June 9, 2010 Well I guess.. I don't know if I should keep trying? Should I tell him how I feel? Then play hard to get? Or drop it completely? Do you think he still likes me? He says he likes me still, but just a little. He said that over the time of me dating Tom, he just kind of lost the feeling. (That one stung quite a bit..) I really did feel something special between us.. I can't just let it go like that when it could/would turn out amazing. Sometimes I tend to form an opinion of someone just by knowing who they date ex: I know this girl thats 17 (or just about) that did a 14 yo boy. Now in my mind that = slut. In this case he could have formed an opinion of you while you were dating tom and thought "because shes dating tom/done this, I'm not really that interested anymore, I didn't know she was like this" etc. No offence but if he's not asking you out its probably better that way, find another perfect guy.
Yamaha Posted June 9, 2010 Posted June 9, 2010 I'm sorry but if he was really into you he would jump at the fact your available now. I don't buy the "he lost the feeling". I think he was ok being your friend and now he is trying to get out of being your bf.
Author DinoFace Posted June 9, 2010 Author Posted June 9, 2010 if he didn't like me then why did he hold my hands and wrap himself into me for hours? it wasn't just like, blah. it was like arms holding me tight, legs intertwined, head on my chest, putting my hand on his chest... it doesn't make any sense? obviously he liked me that day.. but now what? it just disappeared in like.. 12 hours or less?
RedRussian Posted June 9, 2010 Posted June 9, 2010 He knows all my relationships have been ****, and I've been cheated on and pressured into doing things I don't want to. He also knows I was raped two years ago. So I'm not a bad person, but I've gone through so much bad shat, and I was so excited cuz I thought he would be the first guy I wouldnt get treated like shat with. I think you got over excited and scared the guy, I mean he KNOWS about all the baggage you have that is alone enough to scare a guy but he stuck it out just to see and you gone all goo goo ga ga on him, did you tell him you loved him? if not he felt it somehow and was like "not worth it dude"...
Author DinoFace Posted June 10, 2010 Author Posted June 10, 2010 i didn't tell him i loved him. and it's not so much as "baggage" he's just been there with me through it all but it's not like a talk about it or it affects anything now. it really doesn't. all it does is give me hope. i'm a pretty optimistic person. so yeah, it's not like i'm like "oh god im a psycho spazzy spaz and ive been cheated on and raped etcetc" its like, he just knows its happened, cuz we've been friends since then. since second grade actually.... haha. we've been through it all. but yeah anyways haha.
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