Butterflying Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 (edited) In the past few months I've dated and seemingly lost three really neat guys over the same issue. Before I state the issue, let me give you a brief description of each guy. Guy #1: Attractive, successful career entertainment industry, gentleman, great manners, outspoken, single, ect. Guy #2: Attractive, successful career motivational speaker, gentelman, great manners, outspoken, single, ect. Guy #3: Attractive, successful career high profile entertainment industry, gentleman, great manners, outspoken, single, ect. After about a week of dating, each guy sent me a text message requesting a "pic" of myself. Now they didn't go into detail about what type of picture they wanted so I assumed they wanted a basic picture. All of these guys have seen me in person so it's not like they don't know what I look like. Guy #1 is a photographer as a hobby so I don't know why he wouldn't take a picture of me the next time we get together. Regardless, I didn't send any of these guys a picture of myself because I thought the request via text was odd. I asked Guy #2 why he wanted a picture. He asked me, "Why not?" My fear is, I don't like texting pictures of myself because it seems too weired. I have websites that include professional photos of me and that's good enough. But the comfort level for me to text a photo takes longer than a few weeks to trust someone won't misuse the pictures. Unfortunately, I never got a chance to explain this to any of the guys because when I didn't text a picture, they stopped communicating with me entirely...all three of them...not a single word in nearly a month. I've called, text, emailed....no response whatsoever. So now I'm wondering, should I have sent the stupid picture? I mean really??? If I had known not sending a picture would cause men to lose interest in me, I would have sent it with a quickness. What's going on here? Is this the new norm in dating?? Edited June 8, 2010 by Butterflying
RedRussian Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Attractive, successful career entertainment industry, gentleman, great manners, outspoken, single all three of them...not a single word in nearly a month Yes they sure are very gentle and with manners and outspoken but not in that month....also guys with lots of money got so many options one wrong thing for them you do and it's to the next in line. Good luck with your people picker.
Ihavenoidea Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Dont know to be honest I highly doubt it was because of a picture via the phone.
USMCHokie Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 After about a week of dating, each guy sent me a text message requesting a "pic" of myself. Now they didn't go into detail about what type of picture they wanted so I assumed they wanted a basic picture. All of these guys have seen me in person so it's not like they don't know what I look like. Do guys really do this...? The more stories I hear about the guys who women meet online, the more unbelievably normal I feel...wow...
phineas Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 I'm betting they asked so they could see what type of person they were dateing based off the picture she sent. The only time i've asked a woman to text me a pic (and I didn't really ask, I hinted) it was during an exchange of naughty texts.
Author Butterflying Posted June 8, 2010 Author Posted June 8, 2010 I'm betting they asked so they could see what type of person they were dateing based off the picture she sent. The only time i've asked a woman to text me a pic (and I didn't really ask, I hinted) it was during an exchange of naughty texts. I don't know... but this was my guess as well. The guy who asked, "Why not?" really annoyed me, actually. It seemed unfair after all the passionate conversations we'd previously had. I felt he should at least tell me what the picture was for. If he'd said he wanted a naughty one, I might have even given him that because I liked him and sorta trusted him enough. But not telling me why just felt like a slap in the face. And now the no contact is an even bigger slap. Since it happened with more than one guy, I'm starting to think this is my fault for not sending a simple picture. Like, if this ONE thing I did is a deal breaker despite everything I have to offer, I'm in big trouble on the dating scene. What else do I need to be aware of that I'm not doing that causes guys run away?
Author Butterflying Posted June 8, 2010 Author Posted June 8, 2010 The only time i've asked a woman to text me a pic (and I didn't really ask, I hinted) it was during an exchange of naughty texts. By the way, most of these text came spontaneously like: "Good morning. Send me a pic." and "Hey I'm just texting to see how you're doing. Send me a pic." and "Good afternoon beautiful! Send me a pic."
phineas Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 By the way, most of these text came spontaneously like: "Good morning. Send me a pic." and "Hey I'm just texting to see how you're doing. Send me a pic." and "Good afternoon beautiful! Send me a pic." Oh. I used to do that to my STBXW while I was at work or she was at work & I was home. I wanted a naughty picture & she was happy to comply.
Shakz Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Well. if that avatar is you, Butterfly, I'd ask for a pic every day for a year. I have no idea why they would break it off with you because you wouldn't send a pic, but, to my mind, their loss.
sunshinegirl Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Hi OP, Are you saying you have met all three men in person, so they all knew what you looked like... but they still wanted a pic? If so, that seems weird to me. I've *never* dated anyone who, after meeting me, wanted me to text them a photo. What did they want to do with it, whack off or something? I don't think I'd send a pic either, and I'd more generally take it *not* as a sign that I'm doing something wrong and should start sending photos... but instead that I should weed out these guys. Next!
xpaperxcutx Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Hi OP, Are you saying you have met all three men in person, so they all knew what you looked like... but they still wanted a pic? If so, that seems weird to me. I've *never* dated anyone who, after meeting me, wanted me to text them a photo. What did they want to do with it, whack off or something? I don't think I'd send a pic either, and I'd more generally take it *not* as a sign that I'm doing something wrong and should start sending photos... but instead that I should weed out these guys. Next! It's obvious. If there is such thing as sextexting, then there is something as sexpic-ing. Usually that, or they expect pics where they then send it off to their buddies to judge. OP, if you're not comfortable about sending your pics, then don't. Especially to guys who don't even have the courtesies to do anything else asides than " Hey, send me a pic".
Bogo123 Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 I don't see whats so weird about it. They want a pic of you to look at. Perhaps they find you attractive? Stop overanalyzing.
Gallaxia Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Soooooo they all immediately stopped contacting youafter not getting what they wanted? Butterflying- sounds like you're good.
Ruby Slippers Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Don't ever do something you're not comfortable with to keep a man. If they really liked you, you not sending a picture would not have stopped them.
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