Coldhearted22 Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 (edited) I dated a girl for eight months, she always would text guys back that wanted more than friends. She said she was being nice. I pretty much lived with her the whole time. It was never good enough, I was still in college and she was a nurse. I also play college football and work alot. Nothing was ever good enough, she didnt appreciate me coming over after work to fall asleep with her. She complained with I had class and couldnt hangout with her on her days off. Her twin sister who she lives with would have 2-3 different guys over every week, so amanda would be ok with lying for her. Overtime our love life faded, even though I was the first one to give her an orgasm. She never did anything sweet for me, not a text, a phone call i miss you, nothing. I kept trying, doing anythng I could and would to make her happy. She went to vegas over spring break of this year. I drove her to the airport, their flight was overbooked, so guess who drove back and picked them up then drove them back again, I spent four hours that day on the road. Talks to me once in vegas, the day she gets back she says we aint gonna workout. I find 60-70 pictures of her with this dude, and text messages sayin how much fun they had together and how much they miss each other. 3 months go by, i then hangout with her for 3 days. We make love and hangout, then i see shes still texting that guy, saying the sweetest things, things i never got close to feeling after pouring my heart out for 8 months for love. she would say things or do things once in a blue moon, and that gave me false hope, thats why i kept trying. She said she just wants to hangout now, as she just went to an island and yes i know i wont hear from her until she gets back. She says she misses me, but doesnt wanna be exclusive right now. She is so intrigued by this guy, and he lives in another country! they skype and text...I cant figure it out. I am a total mess, i dont eat much, i dont feel anything, I am extremely bitter towards the world. I try to do so much and so many things to get over her, nothing works. I lay in bed at night while everything races through my mind, ive had thoughts of suicide, just running away from everything i know, anything. I love the outdoors, fishing, camping, a mans man. love country music and being tough. But i cry constantly alone, Im tearing up now. I wanna be done with this so bad. How can someone be ok with degrading, lying, hurting, killing me when they know how happy i could make them, how id be there for them always...I cant stand it. I know time heals all, but I dont feel like it will happen this time. O your probably wondering how i met her, my damn sister introduced me to her. Please help me, I honestly feel totally hopeless, its the worst feeling to love someone so much, would die for them, think about them constantly, and know any day, weekend, or now while shes on an island, is screwing someone else, loving and waking up to them, not giving a damn about me. Please, I would love to hear anyone and everyones opininon about what to do and how to cope and get over. I am sorry for it being so long, but the nights are the longest hours of time i spend alone, its awful. Brady Edited June 7, 2010 by Coldhearted22
BlkAzian Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 How old are you? Im going to be honest with you.. LET THAT S**** Go. There is a woman out there who will appreciate a good man like you. You also need time to get over this, Dont sleep with her, If I were you I would be scared to you dont want to catch a disease. Dont jump into another relationship. Finish school get on with your life. You dont need someone who doesnt have your best interest at hand and on top of it you are letting this female use you.. Next time she calls u to be her personal taxi tell her No! You are only hurting yourself if you continue on like this. She doesnt give a Damn about you and you sure wont get any attention if you commit suicide. She will just continue on. GOD did not put you on this planet for you to be used and abused by some permiscuous female that thinks you are nothing. You sound like a Good Man, Find you a good woman she is out there we ladies always look for a good man. This girl your trippin over doesnt want you, you need to face that! MOOOOOOOVE ON! I am a female and I get mad when a good guy gets treated bad because so many times we are the ones getting treated bad, dont call her cut her off like a light.. My advice is free it costs you nothing.
Author Coldhearted22 Posted June 7, 2010 Author Posted June 7, 2010 Im twenty two, I know it sucks so fin bad because I mean I know i gotta move on. Its just when i fall for someone, I overlook so many of their mistakes, push the bad memories deep down to forget them. It is awful, she doesnt deserve me, but it sucks Im the one sitting here thinking about it all the time and shes long gone done caring about me a long time ago.....Howd u get over the guys that screwed you over?
Fight4Me Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 I agree that you need to stop letting her back into your life. You will be tempted to do so, but she'll cut and run again and all the progress you will have made to get over her will reset back at zero. Believe it or not, the pain you are in is part of the healing process, in fact, there would be something wrong with you if you didn't have it. I have always maintained that the pain from a broken heart, especially after being lied to and cheated on, is one of the greatest we go through in life. So, take some comfort in knowing that what you are going through is normal, and you WILL get through it. One of the best ways to work through your grief is to come up with a basic plan, it will help you gain a better sense of control over the situation and distract you from the pain. Right now, you need to work on a short term plan for keeping you from letting her back into your life. Write down everything, no matter how silly, you can do or say to yourself that will prevent you from taking her calls, responding to her texts or emails, and to ultimately cut her out of your life. Try to see this week as an opportunity to get yourself together, knowing that you would not have been motivated to do this had she not gone off with her next victim. And that leads me to my final thought. This "woman" has some big issues, and no matter how much fun you imagine them having, it is all going to come to the same ending like it did with you. She is not capable of having a healthy relationship and never will be until she gets some personal help. She's like a Cat 4 tornado, leaving a wide path of destruction in her wake, and she isn't done yet. You can clean up the mess she made, you can rebuild, and the sun will shine again (corny, but true).
cyanide_catharsis Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 you mentioned to me in my post that, if my ex really cared about me, she would have taken steps to save our relationship when it was going sour. it seems that same kind of thing applies to your situation. if she cared as much about you as you cared about her, then she would not have even thought texting those other guys. don't settle for being her number two. if she isn't contacting you, and your the one thinking about her all the time, then she doesn't deserve you. i'm in the exact same situation. we are good guys. we deserve significant others who are going to reciprocate our feelings and love completely. guys like us are few and far between out there (i know because i have some friends who are total d-bags, yet always manage to get girlfriends). it doesn't seem fair, but we will eventually find what we are looking for. stay strong, don't contact her. come on this board or shoot me an e-mail when you feel the urge. don't give her the satisfaction of letting her know that you are hurt, it will only serve to further inflate her ridiculous ego.
S.Tee Posted June 8, 2010 Posted June 8, 2010 Hi there, I am still new in this conversation. Just notice from your words that you must be good, innocent guy that is very much faithful. Good guy deserves better woman, and most likely, she is NOT the one. Do not think she cares anyway, but somehow "wild girls" need some time to find her right man, are you willing to wait? Nope? Then it is better off as what been said from other members. The 2nd concern is: can you live without her? Do not suffer yourself if along the period, you are not eating/sleeping well coz it will not make any sense if you decide to break-up but then you are in bad shape while she is having fun. Make yourself busy, or the best is prepare yourself before breaking-up for good. Then if you can cope with that, you have made the right choice. Good luck
Author Coldhearted22 Posted June 9, 2010 Author Posted June 9, 2010 My question is shes been on vacation all week, and i havent heard once from her, she said she wanted to ride down to her parents to get her dog when she gets back together. What do i do when she texts me to ride down with her? I was thinkin maybe i will and just be her friend and not have any physical contact? not look through her phone act like i dont care? or will that even matter? if she sees me as a friend and not desperate to be back with her will she realize dang...i guess i cant have him whenver? Or should i not talk to her at all? because i want her to hurt, i want her to feel half the pain i felt when i saw all those pictues and text messages. She is a compulsive liar, greedy, selfish, and her and her twin sister come first, always. It sucks becasue its made me a bitter cold person. I am still a nice guy, just towards girls i dont pursue them anymore, im totally out of the game and dont intent on playing again. How do i make her hurt? or what if we dont talk for three months then i see her somewhere in public with another guy? how do i act or what do i say if she comes to talk to me?
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