SilentVoice Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Definition : A man with a madonna-whore complex is a man who will sleep with and lust for a sexual and beautiful woman but he will never respect her as "wife" material and he will never marry her.(Urban Dictionary) -- The number one reliable source lol I am going to try and make this nice and short. I am pretty aware of the madonna-whore complex. I have talked about this with some gy friends and even though some(most) calm that they want and "women in the streets and a freak in the sheets" guys seem not to really want this. Me personally, I am a very sexual person but people won't know this unless one has been in the bedroom with me,but I am just tired of the fact that when I try to have a relationship with a guy and he realizes that I maybe/am good in bed , I am written of as "fast". I just don't understand what guys want? They want you sexual -- but once you are half of them get insecure about it You act like a brick -- you get treated like a princess I understand that many guys aren't like this. And it may just be the guys that I am meeting . I am not at all complaining , I am still young I have time. Just venting I guess. So how many guys out there truthfully have this madonna-whore complex? And why?
Woggle Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Men are just trying to protect ourselves. What is so wrong with looking for the best possible relationship material if that is what a man is looking for? You see the drama that a lot of guys go through on this board so why should a man not do everything he can to prevent that?
Author SilentVoice Posted June 6, 2010 Author Posted June 6, 2010 Men are just trying to protect ourselves. What is so wrong with looking for the best possible relationship material if that is what a man is looking for? You see the drama that a lot of guys go through on this board so why should a man not do everything he can to prevent that? Umm I guess that is ok... but protect yourself from what? Everyone should look for the best possible relationship material .. I agree with that. What drama?
Woggle Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Umm I guess that is ok... but protect yourself from what? Everyone should look for the best possible relationship material .. I agree with that. What drama? Sexually free women are usually considered to be more likely to cheat and be unfaithful. That is what men like this are thiinking. Men want to prevent being cheated on.
ADF Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 You've pretty much captured the essence of the problem. Men afflicted with the madonna/whore complex like women who give them sex, but they don't really respect them. On the other hand, while they respect women who make them wiat for sex, or who are sexually vanilla, they don't like them. Women lose out either way. But of course, so do men. When a man meet a sexually experienced, aggressive, he ought to be thankful. He ought to be grateful to every other guy she's ever slept with for helping make her who she is. But too many don't. At the root of all this is a deep, abiding fear, hatred and distrust of women, and of female sexuality in particular.
Author SilentVoice Posted June 6, 2010 Author Posted June 6, 2010 Sexually free women are usually considered to be more likely to cheat and be unfaithful. That is what men like this are thiinking. Men want to prevent being cheated on. Oh ok.. I don't agree but I understand your logic
Author SilentVoice Posted June 6, 2010 Author Posted June 6, 2010 You've pretty much captured the essence of the problem. Men afflicted with the madonna/whore complex like women who give them sex, but they don't really respect them. On the other hand, while they respect women who make them wiat for sex, or who are sexually vanilla, they don't like them. Women lose out either way. But of course, so do men. When a man meet a sexually experienced, aggressive, he ought to be thankful. He ought to be grateful to every other guy she's ever slept with for helping make her who she is. But too many don't. At the root of all this is a deep, abiding fear, hatred and distrust of women, and of female sexuality in particular. Sigh.. you are so right
Woggle Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 There is fear and mistrust but there are usually good reasons for that fear and mistrust.
TaurusTerp Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Oh ok.. I don't agree but I understand your logic Dont worry, men who are secure don't think this way. I appreciated that my ex was very sexually adventurous, and didn't think for a second she would be more likely to cheat on me.
ADF Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Sexually free women are usually considered to be more likely to cheat and be unfaithful. That is what men like this are thiinking. Men want to prevent being cheated on. Woggle, I've seen several of your posts now, and I see a recurrent pattern. You are perpetually haunted by this idea of women cheating on you. Frankly, it makes you sound insecure in your own ability to keep a woman satisfied sexually. Even if sexually uninhibited women were more likely to cheat--and they're not--why not take the risk? I'd much rather be with someone sexually exicitng and risk heartbreak than play it safe with someone sexually repressed and boring.
Author SilentVoice Posted June 6, 2010 Author Posted June 6, 2010 There is fear and mistrust but there are usually good reasons for that fear and mistrust. I don't agree... that is like me saying that I won't be with a guy because he is too good looking and he is going to cheat. Or if a guy has had many partners he won't ever slow down. But I know my thoughts are in the minority.
Author SilentVoice Posted June 6, 2010 Author Posted June 6, 2010 Dont worry, men who are secure don't think this way. I appreciated that my ex was very sexually adventurous, and didn't think for a second she would be more likely to cheat on me. :-) ... finally someone who I can agree with
Woggle Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Woggle, I've seen several of your posts now, and I see a recurrent pattern. You are perpetually haunted by this idea of women cheating on you. Frankly, it makes you sound insecure in your own ability to keep a woman satisfied sexually. Even if sexually uninhibited women were more likely to cheat--and they're not--why not take the risk? I'd much rather be with someone sexually exicitng and risk heartbreak than play it safe with someone sexually repressed and boring. Because I have been betrayed and I don't want it to happen again. Some people like drama and consider it exciting but I don't.
Woggle Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 I don't agree... that is like me saying that I won't be with a guy because he is too good looking and he is going to cheat. Or if a guy has had many partners he won't ever slow down. But I know my thoughts are in the minority. Being good looking is something he can not help but a woman being promiscious is. Plus sexually free women come with a mentality that condones cheating in men because in their eyes men are only getting a taste of our own medicine.
Author SilentVoice Posted June 6, 2010 Author Posted June 6, 2010 Being good looking is something he can not help but a woman being promiscious is. Plus sexually free women come with a mentality that condones cheating in men because in their eyes men are only getting a taste of our own medicine. I didn't say I was promiscious(if you are referring to me) I said I like sex. I am pretty sure their is a difference. I am not religous so I am not "sinning". How does liking sex become promiscious. What mentality is that?
ADF Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Because I have been betrayed and I don't want it to happen again. Some people like drama and consider it exciting but I don't. I've been betrayed too--more than once, in fact. And it is an ugly and painful thing to go through. But it is also a pretty normal life experience. If you live long enough, chances are someone at some point is going to cheat on you. I am not trying to put you down. I actually think guys who worry about this stuff as much as you do are themselves victims of the madonna/whore complex. They build up the women they love in their own minds to the point where they seem more than human (madonnas). When they turn out not to be, the men are crushed and begin to regard them as the lowest of the low (whores).
brainygirl Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 So . . . Women who like sex are more likely to cheat. Women who don't like sex aren't likely to cheat. But how many men in sexless marriages are on these same boards whining and complaining? So as a woman how likes sex, and tends to decide weather she wants to have sex with a particular guy or not early in a relationship, I am not LTR material, based on this logic? Funny, I've never cheated, and I won't even flirt with a man who is in a relationship. Logic fail.
MrNate Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 This really isn't a hard question. The complex stems from a jealousy/hatred of female sexuality. Men recognize and understand that a woman's sexuality is very powerful, exceeding theirs. So they perceive women as having it easy in this area of life that men find themselves having to work harder in. It's also something men value a lot, so when the thought of women doing what men do, except with much more ease and efficiency enters their heads, one can see where the envy stems from. And from the envy, breeds insecurity, among other things. So the real issue here then becomes a matter of a man who understands this, but doesn't let it get to him. And a man who does understand this, but lets it get to him.
SarahRose Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 You see the guys who married the plain vanilla sex/doesn't like sex girls on here all the time complaining they aren't getting any sex. I mean what did they really expect? Did they think once they said I do she was going to turn from frigid into a sex maniac? I think that many men are extremely insecure about their sexuality and they just take it out on women. Then you hear time and time again home men have to spread their seed but woman shouldn't.
alphamale Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 And it may just be the guys that I am meeting . its the guys you're meeting
Author SilentVoice Posted June 7, 2010 Author Posted June 7, 2010 its the guys you're meeting I your bluntness lol
Woggle Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 A man has to choose between a frigid cold fish or a woman who cheats on him with no remorse. It is a hard choice.
MrNate Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 A man has to choose between a frigid cold fish or a woman who cheats on him with no remorse. It is a hard choice. cold fish... lol
A O Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 I am pretty aware of the madonna-whore complex. I have talked about this with some gy friends and even though some(most) calm that they want and "women in the streets and a freak in the sheets" guys seem not to really want this. Its a convenient myth - good for easing the minds of some women but not much else. Most whore's come with strings attached - rules over what they will and won't do (and not to mention the monitory aspect of it all). Few men want that in a woman. Men also rarely think about respect when it comes to sex - that's an alien concept next to the overriding need to get one's rocks off. It's good but hardly accurate conversational banter for women. .
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