Engadget Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 I've made a couple posts in the past about how women in general don't pursue us men, well I got my wish last night with a girl I met through my friend. We hung out and watched a movie and as I drove home I started getting messages from a number I'd never seen, wanting me to play the guessing game as to who it was. My friend had given her my number and we later talked on the phone for a few hours. She's older than me, has a house to herself and is very forward, which I like. She basically came out and said she's not looking for a relationship, which is good because neither am I. We're going on a "date" today which should be interesting, since it seems she wants a casual relationship and the possibility of sex came up. It's nice when women pursue and make the effort as opposed to leaving it in our hands every time.
Sivok Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 Sure is, but those are the hardest to keep as well. Goodluck!
Els Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 One man's meat is another man's poison. I can think of quite a few men on this forum alone who insist that women should not be assertive. Regardless, I'm really glad you found someone whom you click with in that aspect!
Author Engadget Posted June 3, 2010 Author Posted June 3, 2010 Sure is, but those are the hardest to keep as well. Goodluck! Well, I tend to not develop feelings for anyone so I don't run the risk of getting hurt, so hopefully it won't be a problem!
carhill Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 I've met a few of those since stbx filed for divorce and, meh, they do nothing for me. Unfeminine. Perhaps it's along the same lines as women not viewing me as masculine because I can cook from scratch and iron laundry, IDK. I do know my friends wives look at me funny when they see me at work in the kitchen, whether helping them or by myself. So, it's perception. I guess my perception is as valid as theirs, no? Hope you enjoy your 'date'. I enjoyed the 'dates' too, but there was nothing which moved me about their auras, consistent with my feelings from decades gone by. They seem 'distant'. I have met some independent *and* attractive women, but they have all been from other cultures and countries, where independence and femininity co-exist wonderfully. Since you're not looking for a relationship and I enjoyed being married (the reality of it) and would like to be again, perhaps your people-picker is better tuned than my own. Hope it works out
Els Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 Well, I tend to not develop feelings for anyone so I don't run the risk of getting hurt, so hopefully it won't be a problem! That is very sad. Best make sure you keep things casual and state so very clearly then.
marsle85 Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 Well, I tend to not develop feelings for anyone so I don't run the risk of getting hurt, so hopefully it won't be a problem! Aww, really?
Author Engadget Posted June 3, 2010 Author Posted June 3, 2010 Aww, really? Yeah, I was in a six year relationship that ended in a lot of lies and betrayal. I'm not willing to let anyone in just yet. She seems to want it casual too, she brought it up pretty directly and I agreed. Heading out for our "date" now, we'll see how it goes.
Cracker Jack Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 Sounds like an awesome woman. Hope it goes well with you two. I'd embraced this fully if it happened to me.
DanielMadr Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 OP, you are so f@cking lazy, aren't you? Yeah it is fine when women do all the work....and rejection risking. Just make sure the reason for her masculine behavior (it is masculine to take the risks) is her interest in you, not that she is really masculine and will f@ck you with a dildooo on your 3rd date.
Woggle Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 It depends on what you mean by assertive and independent.
marlena Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 Good luck with your date. I agree, independence is ALWAYS sexy. As is a person who has the confidence to pursue what he/she wants. P.S. For some odd reason, I thought you were a woman.
Mimolicious Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 Good luck on your date! I am one those women and I can tell you, I can be a bit frivolous when it comes to "dating" nowadays. Who can blame me???!!
Author Engadget Posted June 4, 2010 Author Posted June 4, 2010 Went very well, she is very, very aggressive. We had talked about waiting on sex, and when we got back to her house she wasn't having that. We rounded the bases over a few hours, woke up and did it again after sleeping nude, and I just met her the day before.
brainygirl Posted June 4, 2010 Posted June 4, 2010 Went very well, she is very, very aggressive. We had talked about waiting on sex, and when we got back to her house she wasn't having that. We rounded the bases over a few hours, woke up and did it again after sleeping nude, and I just met her the day before. SOunds like my kind of night.
Author Engadget Posted June 5, 2010 Author Posted June 5, 2010 Only downside I feared is her getting too attached, which she already seems to be.
Ilovehim Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Umm..is that your definition of the type of woman you want though? To each their own I guess. I would never tell a guy "I don't want a relationship but we can have sex and be friends with benefits." I'm not the one who is single though so I guess whatever floats your boat.
Ilovehim Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Went very well, she is very, very aggressive. We had talked about waiting on sex, and when we got back to her house she wasn't having that. We rounded the bases over a few hours, woke up and did it again after sleeping nude, and I just met her the day before. Again, I will sound closed minded but I like people who respect themselves. Also, I would never date someone who would even do what you did AND talk about it like it's a good thing. Call me old fashioned but sex on the first date doesnt exactly scream "classy" or "respects herself". A man who gets with these type of women is a big turn off for me.
Els Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Again, I will sound closed minded but I like people who respect themselves. Also, I would never date someone who would even do what you did AND talk about it like it's a good thing. Call me old fashioned but sex on the first date doesnt exactly scream "classy" or "respects herself". A man who gets with these type of women is a big turn off for me. Oh c'mon. Is it so inconceivable that a woman might want to have sex early because she enjoys casual sex? Just because the only reason YOU might want to have sex early on is because of lack of self-respect, it doesn't mean that others share the same reasons.
Jersey Shortie Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Men are usually more happy with assertive women when it comes to causual dating. For a woman that wants to be considered more seriously..i am not convinced.
Serenitynow Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 Thats the only kind of women I have relationships with. But its not so much because I shy away from more conservative women, but because the conservative types sit around wanting/waiting for the guy to do all the leg work. Its not 1890 anymore, women need to get off their butts and stop whining on forums wondering if a guy like her and be assertive. Assertive women show equal signs of initiating calling, contact, date ideas, etc.
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