threebyfate Posted June 5, 2010 Posted June 5, 2010 I tried that. I probably could improve further in that area, but I tried to be very honest in how I felt. Unfortunately, it was received somewhat poorly and with much suspicion. Plus, I met up with a brick wall in teh communication department.Then you were with the wrong man. What you had was a guy who can't handle honesty, can't handle the truth, distrustful, suspicious and sucked at communication. Don't let this guy affect your outlook. There are plenty of decent guys who aren't emotionally dysfunctional. But it takes time to meet the right one for you, since not all decent or indecent men are right for you.
Author daphne Posted June 5, 2010 Author Posted June 5, 2010 Then you were with the wrong man. What you had was a guy who can't handle honesty, can't handle the truth, distrustful, suspicious and sucked at communication. Don't let this guy affect your outlook. There are plenty of decent guys who aren't emotionally dysfunctional. But it takes time to meet the right one for you, since not all decent or indecent men are right for you. You're right. I came to that conclusion yesterday after blowing off a lot of steam in a drunken outing. I realized that in the long run I was looking at a teaching relationship at best, a roller coaster ride at worst. Somehow, however, when you get let down by someone you see as having a lot of potential, you want to think you can do something to control the outcome for the next time. I'm not sure I'd do anything different than I did this time though. I put it out there, and I was true to myself. It just didn't work out. I can't let his issues bother me.
threebyfate Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 You're right. I came to that conclusion yesterday after blowing off a lot of steam in a drunken outing. I realized that in the long run I was looking at a teaching relationship at best, a roller coaster ride at worst. Somehow, however, when you get let down by someone you see as having a lot of potential, you want to think you can do something to control the outcome for the next time. I'm not sure I'd do anything different than I did this time though. I put it out there, and I was true to myself. It just didn't work out. I can't let his issues bother me.Yes, it can get disheartening. Another thing I've also learned is that potential means squat-diddly-do. How they treat you right here, right now, is meaningful. If the right now isn't working within a reasonable length of time, it's time to bail.
Author daphne Posted June 6, 2010 Author Posted June 6, 2010 Yes, it can get disheartening. Another thing I've also learned is that potential means squat-diddly-do. How they treat you right here, right now, is meaningful. If the right now isn't working within a reasonable length of time, it's time to bail. I know. Potential is like a stock performance prediction. There should be a disclaimer on that for men that there are absolutely no guarantees that the male will live up to his p/e or "potential."
MrNate Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 I know. Potential is like a stock performance prediction. There should be a disclaimer on that for men that there are absolutely no guarantees that the male will live up to his p/e or "potential." gotta read the fine print ladies,
threebyfate Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 I know. Potential is like a stock performance prediction. There should be a disclaimer on that for men that there are absolutely no guarantees that the male will live up to his p/e or "potential." Hey, you speeka my language!
DanielMadr Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 I know. Potential is like a stock performance prediction. There should be a disclaimer on that for men that there are absolutely no guarantees that the male will live up to his p/e or "potential." You expect too much, thats the problem. Take example from men, we gave up centuries ago. Now we are OK with: She has to be pretty, give a head, don't forget the balls, fix a sandwich , be nice to children and turn down the emotional drama thing.
threebyfate Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 You expect too much, thats the problem. Take example from men, we gave up centuries ago. Now we are OK with: She has to be pretty, give a head, don't forget the balls, fix a sandwich , be nice to children and turn down the emotional drama thing.I disagree that she's expecting too much. Of the times I've had heartbreak, have been the times where my expectations weren't high enough. My husband meets my expectations and many times he exceeds them. That's what you get when you don't settle for less.
DanielMadr Posted June 6, 2010 Posted June 6, 2010 I disagree that she's expecting too much. Of the times I've had heartbreak, have been the times where my expectations weren't high enough. My husband meets my expectations and many times he exceeds them. That's what you get when you don't settle for less. And if you can do/be the things mentioned (fix a sandwich and stuff), you will do just fine.
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