whatitdo Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 Ok... I'll try to make this short and simple. I am in a weird situation. I'm seeing a girl. we dated years back and now we are trying to do it all over again. she is all gun ho... but for me it just isnt the same. i mean certain parts are great. but the things she used to do that bothered me are so much stronger now. before i could look past them now that bother me so much. I mean part of me truly feels as if we have changed too much since we last dated 2 yrs ago. now part two: the girl i was seeing before this wants me to come back. the problem is there are way to many things i would have to do to make that work. No facebook, no computer, change my phone number, no contact with any of my purely platonic female friends, cut back on drinking as she doesnt drink at all. But we things are good with us things are really good. I know that i still love her because any time she mentions moving on or another guy i lose my mind. SO two part question. is it possible me and stacey grew apart? And two do I love angela or is it just me being jealous? if not is it right to have to give up all my friends until she feels comfortable?
LittleMissWonder Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 You shouldn't be with anyone at all. You need to discover yourself and what you want out of your life. It is not fair for Stacey to be with a man who doesn't reciprocate her feelings and has eyes for another woman. And you should not be with Angela because: a) jealousy is a bad way to begin any relationship b) she has extreme insecurity issues to need you to cut off all your friends, facebook, computer, and phone #. The relationship is a recipe for disaster.
Author whatitdo Posted June 2, 2010 Author Posted June 2, 2010 Well that is this the thing. When Stacey and I started dating i had no eyes for anybody. Slowly all the little things she used to do started gettng to me. My ex contacted me about our son... and slowly my eyes have been drifting. Truly they started drifting I believe based on the fact that I am not satisfied with her. I mean I love her and will always love her. But it isnt the same love I had before. Before nothng she did really bothered me it was just "her" now it does. And two, we cant seem to make a connecting mentally or sexually anymore.
LittleMissWonder Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 It happens. I don't fault you for it. But now that it has happened and you are aware of it, you need to leave her. And also, you should not be with the other woman either. She sounds clingy. I'm sure it doesn't help that she's your baby mama. Besides, you will be in 'rebound mode' and should just lay low for a bit. NEVER settle for a woman who gets jealous of your platonic friends or tries to make you get rid of your phone/computer. That is just ludicrous.
Author whatitdo Posted June 4, 2010 Author Posted June 4, 2010 Well, you are so right. I would say the whole situation is difficult. As far as the baby mama jealous thing. she still holds it against me that i cheated on her the first year we were together. So, I mean that is what is behind the computer, the new phone number, the no platonic female friends, no going out to bars/clubs with family or friends... etc. As far as Stace goes, it is hard to grasp that although i have pined for her for the last 2 almost 3 years now i have her and im not happy. it blows my mind.
Serenitynow Posted June 4, 2010 Posted June 4, 2010 This post proves over and over, how the people that have a life of disarray always have multiple options for dates and the people that have their shyt together are left single unable to find a date. These kinds of posts are repeated and repeated
LittleMissWonder Posted June 7, 2010 Posted June 7, 2010 If she can't learn to forgive you and trust you again, the relationship is doomed. A relationship cannot be forced if trust has been broken. She either needs to trust you & put her guard down or you can't be together. There is no in between. There is no compromising by saying you will sacrifice things in your life. You can't live with her constantly over your shoulder, worried what you're going to do next. That isn't fair for you. And it's not fair for her to settle for someone she doesn't trust. It's either you guys gotta learn to really start fresh or don't even bother at all.
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