cyanide_catharsis Posted June 1, 2010 Posted June 1, 2010 ok, first of all i just want to thank anyone who can read this and provide input. i'm so heartbroken/lost/confused, any kind of feedback helps. i'll get right to the story. i dated this girl for about four months. it was a short but VERY intense relationship. we started out by doing cute things like drawing each other pictures and writing poems and stuff like that. we fell in love very fast and even started telling each other "i love you" all of the time after only like 1 month into the relationship. we even started to talk about being together forever and marriage. things were great for like two months, i loved her and she loved me just as much. about two months into the relationship, she started to get a little distant, i could tell but didn't say much. then one day, after we had a fight the night before. she told me she felt like we were "on the rocks". she said she was going through some tough things and didn't have any feelings of affection towards anyone (her friends or myself).. a little more time passed and she told me she didn't want to label me as her "boyfriend" anymore. she told me having a boyfriend was too much pressure. she just wanted to be friends but continue to see me all of the time. so i tried this. it went on for about a month and a half. during this time, we still hung out and remained in constant contact, however, we were just friends, all of the affection had stopped, and we barely had sex anymore (keep in mind, before this it was happening almost every night that we spent together). this lack of affection was killing me. also during this time, she developed a sort of abusive attitude towards me (she began putting me down constantly by saying very hurtful things and starting fights with me over stupid things). if i would ask her about getting back together, she would get VERY angry and complain about how annoying i was. i asked her if she wanted to take a break and she said "no". i tried to break up with her but she would stick around and i would take her back. finally, i told her we needed a break. so we stopped hanging out, but stayed in contact via phone call and text message. everyday was so hard for me. i was so heartbroken over this and i couldn't take it. my friends advised me to just end things. so i did. we were supposed to go to a wedding one weekend together, it was two days beforehand and i told her i didn't wanna go. she got EXTREMELY bitchy with me and i finally ended it. i sent her an apology letter about a week later and she said she would be able to forgive me, but then called to scream at me three days later because she found out i was talking to her brother (about something that wasn't even related to her). so finally, she told me not to speak to her friends or family, and i told her to do the same. the end. now it's been almost three weeks of no contact and i still miss her a lot. i'm not sure what i should do. did i make the right choice to end things? will i ever get her back? what can i do to get her back? should i even try or should i just try to get over her? any advice would be greatly appreciated. thank you so so so much for reading! i REALLY appreciate any help!
random122 Posted June 1, 2010 Posted June 1, 2010 im sorry because it seems like you've fallen for an emotionally unstable girl. it's going to be rough, but the best thing i can tell you is to try to move on. i'm trying myself w/ some difficulty, but ive been reading and thinking objectively about other people's stories to find some truth in my own. the best advice i can give you, from my own experience, is to think about what it would be like to marry someone w/ such erratic tendencies. that's what's worked best for me. time will tell...i'm 7 months out of a relationship I ended myself and i'm still not over the girl, so. also, beware of those who catch fire w/ love fast...it doesnt seem like your girl really loves you, and my ex said she loved someone who she had never had a conversation w/. my two cents.
Parlanchina Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 (edited) Well, she doesn't want anything to do with you anymore, I guess. The "erratic" behavior of forgiving you one day and screaming at you the next and not wanting you to talk to anyone she knows simply means that. A girl who really loves you wouldn't act like the way she did. You were also the one who ended things... Give your little jellyfish backbone some strength and don't come back asking for her to get back with you. High chance she will feel you are annoying and will be bitchy again. Edited June 3, 2010 by Parlanchina
Recommended Posts