weeble78 Posted June 1, 2010 Posted June 1, 2010 I posted something else earlier, but this is another thing I'd like an opinion on if anyone can help. My bf left his job, which he'd been at for 10 years, last wednesday. He walked out as he's been saying for months that he hates it and can't stand it any more. He has made little effort to find antoher job whilst in it, on my advice, and instaed thinks it better to walk out (it's VERY well paid) and 'chill' for a few months then look for another one. Also he was supposed to go in today for a meeting with his boss but smoked too much weed so had to postpone it to tomorrow. He finds this funny. I am upset. We've been talking marriage and children. It seems like he's changed personality overnight. I have told him I'll support him btu I think he realises I don't agree with what he's done. What on earth can I do? I'm shocked at what he's just told me and now have visions of him being too stoned to take the children to school or too lazy to get a job and contribute to looking after them (if we had any). I'm freaking because I've recently come out of a relationship where I mostly paid for things because my ex couldn't be bothered. I took responsibilitly for everything and it made me very ill. Thank you for reading.
Crazy Magnet Posted June 1, 2010 Posted June 1, 2010 You've recently come out of a relationship where you paid for everything and you are already considering marriage and kids with a new man? Maybe what you intend to say isn't coming across in the right way. I know it's hard to watch someone self destruct and you want to help him because you are emotionally invested in him. Sometimes it helps to step back from it all and let him do whatever it is that he needs to do. If you are there at the end, great, if you've found someone more like what you are looking for, great for you.
Shakz Posted June 1, 2010 Posted June 1, 2010 He quit his job in this economy? He must've been stoned. I honestly think you should kick his stoner-ass.
Serenitynow Posted June 1, 2010 Posted June 1, 2010 too stoned to take the children to school or too lazy to get a job He's a drug user and you only now you worry about the future ? Was it going to be ok to make babies with drugs in his system ? and maybe yours too ?
Author weeble78 Posted June 1, 2010 Author Posted June 1, 2010 Ok, so first he smokes sometimes once a day, and has never spent a day smoking. The plan we had was to move in together in Sept, live in a small bedsit for a year while saving to go travelling, come back home and save for a nice place, get married and then have children within the next four years. He's started smoking again mainly because the guys he moved in with all smoke and some of them constantly. He wants to move out and stop this habit, and move on with his life and be happy. He's been unhappy wiht his job for 3 years and has become depressed. I have been with him 7 months. Crazy Magnet, I have naturally taken a small step back, kind of instinctively. But have offere dmy help and have been helping him with his CV. Also I hear ya with the thinking of marriage and kids, and maybe it is all to crazy and soon (which we've both thought about), but we're both so excited about our future it's kind of all happened without either one of us pushing it. Shakz - just what I'm wondering I should maybe be doing... Serenitynow - he smokes the odd spliff and is not a heavy drug user. It's something he is looking to change in his life. And no, we would clearly never think about having children whilst leading a life like this. We both want steady jobs, a house and a good couple of happy years behind us.
Recommended Posts