SadKitty78 Posted May 30, 2010 Posted May 30, 2010 So.....as I'm in the, "what did I just allow myself to do I've been so good doing NC for 2 months but now I've gone and done the stupidest thing to KEEP me from moving on" reflection mode, I'd like to ask everyone, if you don't mind sharing. What is the thing you went and did after a breakup that you regret and that kept you from moving on? How did it make you feel? I will share mine in a later post. Don't even want to talk about it right now, but I'd like to at least think I'm not alone.
sedgwick Posted May 30, 2010 Posted May 30, 2010 I regret ever speaking to them again after the minute they dumped me! I wish I'd walked away and ignored them forever.
LucreziaBorgia Posted May 30, 2010 Posted May 30, 2010 The worst thing? I agreed to be 'friends' and we went right back to being together. After a few months of this, I asked him if he considered me his girlfriend again and he said, 'no, I consider you a friend I get to have sex with'. I regret that I didn't just cut off all contact and keep it that way.
Author SadKitty78 Posted June 1, 2010 Author Posted June 1, 2010 dinner kitty? ...then sex? Oh how I WISH you were sooooooooo WRONG!!!!!!!!!!
Scarlett513 Posted June 1, 2010 Posted June 1, 2010 I'm in the middle of doing it right now. The stupidest thing I've done (and continue to do in relationships time after time), is let someone who I know is bad for me talk their way back into my life after I've let them go. I don't know why I do it, but it gets me every time.
monkeymaid Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 your imagination is overriding your knowledge of reality and the proper way to function in the real world. you really cannot figure out on a basal level that the idea of this perfect man and your ex are not the same becasue at one point he met all of those standards. kids function from a state of fantasy and their reality and fantasy worlds are one and the same. ...as we grow up and our brain begins to develop and mature, we learn to discern fantasy from reality and begin to see what it is we must do to make that fantasy real. the trouble is that after a breakup, our fantasy was actually real for the length of time we were with our exes so we cannot see the difference. it takes time to put that ex into their new role as just a fantasy again so we can function in the here and now. its a little far fetched, but it is the way we work.
Nikki Sahagin Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 I don't have any regrets regarding my ex. I just don't see the point. I did some stupid things, kept in touch, had sex with him twice, I really don't regret them or feel guilty about them at all. We all move on in different ways, some of us go back and get burnt a few times before we learn to put our foot down.
Ilovecake Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 I regret ever speaking to them again after the minute they dumped me! I wish I'd walked away and ignored them forever. Exactly what I would say.
redy2 Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 worst thing i did to an ex after we broke up i slept with her best friend and her sister
Author SadKitty78 Posted June 2, 2010 Author Posted June 2, 2010 worst thing i did to an ex after we broke up i slept with her best friend and her sister is this for real? if it is, did you break up with her or did she break up with you? it could make the difference between pretty tacky to pretty hilarious!
lsb Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 monkeymaid this is spot on ---> [...the trouble is that after a breakup, our fantasy was actually real for the length of time we were with our exes so we cannot see the difference. it takes time to put that ex into their new role as just a fantasy again so we can function in the here and now. its a little far fetched, but it is the way we work...] After the break up we need to see that the person we thought our ex was ISN'T who he/she is. We somehow need to take our blinders off and admit that we were wrong about them.
sandiego Posted June 4, 2010 Posted June 4, 2010 It's been a full 8 months since our breakup (aside from a 1 month reunion halfway through).....I haven't pulled off NC for more than 7 days (this includes her contacting me). This is the worst thing I've done. Oh, and breaking up with a cool, new girl.....just to go back to the ex and have her leave me again after a month (and the new girl went and got a new boyfriend in the interim).......frustrating to say the least. SD
Recommended Posts