AmeliaApple Posted May 29, 2010 Posted May 29, 2010 So I've had a few, but have been reading through all the heartbreak, unhappiness, happiness, etc....Is it enough to ask that we all just drop the bull**** and admit when we are in a ****ty relationship and when our relationships are good and that, over all, relationships are both. I can't seem to figure out what goes wrong after 4-5 years. I think, perhaps, 4 years is the new 7....as in 7 year itch. Why can't we just be this honest with our spouses? When things suck, what is it about these intimate relationships that make is so difficult to just get it out there in the open? Believe me, though, I'm the first to try to avoid conflict in the sake of god knows what. I'm just as guilty.
Neutrino Posted May 29, 2010 Posted May 29, 2010 It is interesting most of those stories start after 4-5 years... I think that most primates take about that length of time to conceive and raise an offspring to the point that (in the simple jungle life) it would be able to feed itself. For this time - both parents are required, once the offspring is mature enough - the relationship no longer serves a purpose...
linwood Posted May 30, 2010 Posted May 30, 2010 (edited) Why can't we just be this honest with our spouses? When things suck, what is it about these intimate relationships that make is so difficult to just get it out there in the open? I was just wondering this yesterday. I`ve had something on my mind that was bugging me about our relationship and it was very difficult to tell her. Why does communication seem so difficult within a romantic relationship sometimes? Do we fear insulting hurting or pushing our SO away? I just find it very ****ed up that the deepest most important thoughts wants and needs seem to be the most difficult things to communicate. It`s tragic irony. Edit: By the way, my marriage was rocky as hell the first 4-5 years. It wasn`t until after that time it started getting good. Edited May 30, 2010 by linwood
You Go Girl Posted May 31, 2010 Posted May 31, 2010 By the way, my marriage was rocky as hell the first 4-5 years. It wasn`t until after that time it started getting good. So you went in without the fantasy of who that person was, and you worked out a reality that was successful-- KUDOS to you and yours! Many people go in with a fantasy. The fantasy survives for several years. When they get to the reality stuff, they can't cut the mustard.
Shakz Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 It is interesting most of those stories start after 4-5 years... I think that most primates take about that length of time to conceive and raise an offspring to the point that (in the simple jungle life) it would be able to feed itself. For this time - both parents are required, once the offspring is mature enough - the relationship no longer serves a purpose... I think you're on to something although other primates mature faster than humans. Certainly they reach puberty earlier.
pkn06002 Posted June 2, 2010 Posted June 2, 2010 (edited) Simple trust does not exist in most relationships to the point where you are open and honest with no fear. Most relationships are just driven by chemicals once that wears off what do you have, sure not trust in most cases. Edited June 2, 2010 by pkn06002
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