So

[brokenamy]

Since the last time I wrote here, my husband and I have been talking. To explain shortly, we were married 7 years together 9. I left him for 6 months because he had trust issues and I didn't know of how to make him understand (now I know: counseling). Two weeks before I told him how I felt about him/us, he started seeing someone. They have been together a month. He finally says that he believes me when I tell him I will always stand by him and love him but he claims he is confused and I believe him. But when I pursue him, he becomes fickle and when I try to move on, he wants me. But he says he feels trapped because the girlfriend helped him when I left. I need advice, please on how to get my family back together. I am in therapy and I am keeping a journal to learn from this but I want to take clear steps that will reunite us. He txts and calls me (specially when I don't) he says he won't sleep with me out of respect (yes, I got so desperate as to offer but never again). But he keeps going back to that woman and hertwo kids while his two kids cry for him to be in their life daily.

Thanks in advance.

[brokenamy]

I am still hoping that someone around here will give me their advice/opinion. Please?

[Ronni_W]

I need advice, please on how to get my family back together.

Amy,

The reason no one here can help you with that is because none of us have yet figured out a way to influence, cajole, urge, manipulate or "force" our exes to do something just because what we want or need them to do it.

 

Hopefully your therapist will be able to help you with this, one way or the other.

 

Wishing you success.

[brokenamy]

Thank u Ronnie. I guess I formulated my question wrong. I have no issue moving on and trying to heal myself if there are no chances of ever working things out but my husband keeps calling and txting me and even throws jalousy fits if he thinks I might start dating. He asks me to give

him time and wait for him and I am confused by what he says and then he stays with the other woman who he (says) he feels like she needs him

and he owes her. I am readyingyself yo

let go but he doesn't want me to or does on his end. So thus the confusion and need for advice.

[TaraMaiden]

I'm afraid I don't see where there can be any confusion.

he wants his cake and to eat it too. he wants you to be loyal and faithful to him, and wait around for when he's ready, and he wants to be with the other woman too, and enjoy the benefits of what some would say is classic bigamy.

 

Your choice is to either comply with his wishes, stay in limbo, and agree to wait, hang around and basically put your life on permanent hold and wait for him to do what he wants, with you, when he wants, with you -

 

or -

 

You can tell him to get real, move on, and leave you alone, because you've had it with him, and you're moving on with your life, without him, and all the happier for it. You'll date who you want, when you want and he can shove it where the sun don't shine, because as far as you're concerned, he's history.

 

He can't have it both ways. it's either her or you.

he can't have both.

And right now, you're happy for it to be her, because you're not into handling soiled and second-hand goods.....

 

Hope that helps to make things clearer for you.....

[brokenamy]

Thank you Maiden. It does put things into perspective.