ampskate Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 im 17, and cant get girls at all.... never had a girlfriend and I barely have any girls in my life at all. I try to be nice to everyone and people seem to like me too, but nothing has ever happened. am i just ugly? or is something else wrong... my self esteem is at an all time low. And to make things worse, tonight is junior prom and im not going... cause i couldnt get a date picture of me: http://i893.photobucket.com/albums/ac131/AndrewPerler/Photo95.jpg please help... i just cant understand whats wrong with me
TouchedByViolet Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 First thing, welcome to LS! Second, you are NOT ugly. Honestly, I think your looks are above average. Sorry about your junior prom but life can be tough sometimes. Try to brush it off and get a date for senior prom. Interact with women as much as possible while in school and don't fret over the turn downs too much. High school relationships are completely over rated.
zetkin Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 I agree with Touchedbyviolet, I like how you look. I really do. You are just 17, life is just starting, you have so much time ahead for girls))) I just didn't really understand about why you don't have a date for tonight, have you at least asked anyone?
Author ampskate Posted May 28, 2010 Author Posted May 28, 2010 well its good to know my looks arent much of a problem... high school is confusing as hell as for getting a date, i asked some girls i knew, but they were already going with someone else pretty much all my friends have girlfriends and are all sexually active... kinda sucks to be the one guy who doesnt have anyone ...I almost feel like girls want guys that are really big and have big muscles? its hard to understand what certain girls want Im around 5ft 7in. and pretty skinny (but toned)... i kinda dress like a skater with semi skinny jeans and a clean solid shirt the girls that i talk to seem to like me and say hi to me everytime they see me (even if i dont see them)... but i dont know if its a friend thing or they want more? I feel like if i were to ask them on a date or something, it could potentially ruin the friendship i have with them and leave me with no girls at all and complete awkwardness
tman666 Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 Why are you holding a shoe?? As someone else said, high school relationships are way way overrated. Here's what you do: 1) Do well in school so you can get into college 2) Be as social as possible, but don't hang out with people who try and bring you down. This means that you have to adopt a sort of laid back attitude, but don't be so laid back that you let people walk on you. 3) In regards to physique, some girls like big guys, and others don't. Physique won't get you anywhere if you don't have the personality to match it, but it can definitely help get your foot in the door. Personally, I'm a huge advocate of getting in the gym and building strength/size. Don't do it for the chicks (you'll be massively let down if this is your only reason for lifting). Do it for yourself. I started lifting around your age (I'm 24 now) and I can't believe how much of a huge part of my life it has become. It's a great self confidence booster. It's improved my life immeasurably. 4) Learn to be confident and comfortable with yourself as a single guy. This doesn't mean that you don't extend yourself socially and close yourself off to relationships. However, girls can smell desperate and insecure. High school sucks man. It's best to consider it a training ground for college and beyond. Chances are good that you'll never see most of your classmates again after high school, and even less after college. Life evolves. Evolve with it.
Author ampskate Posted May 28, 2010 Author Posted May 28, 2010 Why are you holding a shoe?? just happens to be a picture i posted on my friends facebook wall cause he wanted to see my new shoes thanks for the advice
tman666 Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 I'm telling you man, if I were you, I'd start lifting. Have you ever done any weight training? If it's something you're interested in, there's a lot of resources available. PM me or start a thread in the Physical Fitness forum if you have any questions.
Author ampskate Posted May 28, 2010 Author Posted May 28, 2010 I'm telling you man, if I were you, I'd start lifting. Have you ever done any weight training? If it's something you're interested in, there's a lot of resources available. PM me or start a thread in the Physical Fitness forum if you have any questions. yep i lift on a regular basis... got a 6 pack and all that stuff haha. I'd say im in good shape (def. not scrawny or anything) idk if i wanna get ripped or "big" though... really hard to decide
tman666 Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 Flaunt what ya got then. I heard somewhere that girls love six packs.
USMCHokie Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 Flaunt what ya got then. I heard somewhere that girls love six packs. As always, tman's advice is spot-on. Go shirtless as often as possible. ...I'm joking... ...or am I...?
brokenblade Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 im 17, and cant get girls at all.... never had a girlfriend and I barely have any girls in my life at all. I try to be nice to everyone and people seem to like me too, but nothing has ever happened. am i just ugly? or is something else wrong... my self esteem is at an all time low. And to make things worse, tonight is junior prom and im not going... cause i couldnt get a date picture of me: http://i893.photobucket.com/albums/ac131/AndrewPerler/Photo95.jpg please help... i just cant understand whats wrong with me You would just have to be a little more assertive and more forward with what you want. But be careful, while it can be nice to be in a relationship with a woman, it may be better to learn to be happy by yourself. If you can't be happy by yourself, any woman or friend you find yourself with may end up taking advantage of you and abusing you. I was in the same situation as you. I tried to please everyone. While people seemed to care for me, at the same time there were people that would walk all over me. I ended up down and out in a bad place. People would often accuse me of stuff that I wouldn't do. I was confused about what was going on until I realized what was happening. It turns out that people were taking my kindness for weakness. (and my kindness was weakness) As a result, they were taking advantage of me. I finally put my foot down and the accusers backed off and the women began warming up to me. I said all this to say, be more secure in who you are. However you can improve yourself, improve yourself. Don't be so much in a hurry to get with a girl. You are free, learn to enjoy it. I know this is probably not the kind of advice you want. But in the end, it is not a girl that is going to make you happy if you are not happy with yourself. Take the time to build yourself as much as you can before you get the girl. (and you will get a girl, you are not a bad looking guy, no one is ugly on the outside, you can have an ugly personality though.) A lot of people are in relationships who wish they were single because they were in too much of a hurry. Otherwise, just talk to women and show yourself to be a fun, assertive responsible person. (You would have to be all of these) And Be Honest (Most Importantly) Keep your head up. I'm 26 now and my life is slowly improving.
Author ampskate Posted May 29, 2010 Author Posted May 29, 2010 I know this is probably not the kind of advice you want actually that was extremely helpful... i happen to have a really low self esteem and my confidence isnt where i want it to be... i know for a fact that i wont take rejection good, but i also feel like having a girl in my life will be the key to my confidence boost... i still really need to take the time to become comfortable with myself though... i just want some type of experience with relationships/ sex/ etc. before i head off to college :/
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