JARAWRA Posted May 26, 2010 Posted May 26, 2010 I made the mistake of breaking up with my girlfriend of 2 years over a text message because I couldn't handle that she would always pick her friends over me with what little free time we had together, but this special case was that we had just conversed about our relationship and how it had felt like we weren't dating and how we weren't happy for a short time while we had been before. But I had told her only douche bags break up over text messages, and I, being the very emotional person I am, tried to hurt her worse then she had me, and because she blew me off for plans made 5 minutes prior and I was given a maybe for next week same time, I felt taken for granted and so I wanted her to realize I won't always forgive her, because I have forgiven her for some very big things, not cheating, but lying which breaks trust and that is all people have in a relationship. But then she sends me all these confusing things, and me being the romantic guy I am tried to fix it with romantic gestures and gifts and tried my damnedest to win her back, but she wants space, which escapes me because I'm used to those damn love movies making me believe they can be won back. But during this time of space I have struggled because she is my very best friend and the love of my life, she is my first everything in most aspects (kissing/making out) and she still wants to be friends through it but not the boyfriend part and I struggle with that because its so soon after, anyways she has told me that she liked her other guy friend and was confused by it, then realized she spoke too soon, and she says she wanted to teach me a lesson that she wouldn't come back, then she said she needs time to figure out her life and what makes her happy, and then she wants me to wait all summer for her, but the thing is, I don't know that I can trust her because she broke my trust and she already has gone off with her guy best friend and girl best friend to smoke weed and blew me off for prior plans and so I once again felt rejected and I have for two stupid days confronted her and yelled at her, and I have made a complete ASS out of myself. She told me should wouldn't have time to really think about things till next week because of finals but yet she'll still be busy then, but I love her and as much as I want to wait for her I can't because I already has lost 10 pounds because of depression and lack of eating, I have lost endless hours of sleep and have cried my eyes out because I made such a poor decision, am I wrong for wanting to move on, is she being manipulative about this whole thing? Do I need to ignore her and give her entire space so she will come back to me? What do I do? We've always been entirely honest with each other and what I fear is that shes just trying to protect me right now and that she does want it to be over because she doesn't want to hurt me
TaraMaiden Posted May 26, 2010 Posted May 26, 2010 Good god man... breathe between words! Ok - read the link on No Contact in my post, and follow through with it 200%. All this back and forth, to-ing and fro-ing is doing neither of you any good. You really need to take some time, space and freedom to get your head clear. Stop, and stop now. tell her you are going absolute No Contact and will only respond to her when she contacts you with "I definitely want you, and only you, in my life and please let's both try to really make a go of this and work together, for each other". Nothing else will do. Go No Contact - mean it, 100% and do it. Totally. And please - don't come back with 'yes, but' s and 'what if' s and 'can I do this if she'..... Drop it, leave it, do it. If you don't you'll just carry on as you are. And please take note of the real reason for No Contact. It's NOT to get them back in your life. It's to get your Life back.
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