KingCrimson Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 first date went well, went to a bar and grill type place and got some drinks and food. Chatted for nearly 4 hours. Left the place, her car was parked opposite side of lot from mine. I walked her to her car but only ended up giving her a hug. I was nervous about going in for the kiss since there was no previous physical contact sitting across from her at the table. She didn't help either - as we neared her car she said she was fine and I don't need to walk her anymore. So I thought she wasn't interested. I talk to her the next day, surprise she's excited to go out again. She said for sure. We had made plans, but she messages me and said something came up and to reschedule, and she promptly suggested another time and place right then and we started discussing what to do (so I know she is definitely interested, if she was she wouldnt have gotten back to me or rescheduled) So now we're going out again. Our plan WAS to go to this nearby park and go for a easy hike/get food and bring up some beer and drink up there. But it's raining, so we'll probably have to go to our plan B which... we only discussed for 10 seconds vaguely... "going to some happy hour and getting a drink then dinner". Not so intimate a setting and opportunities to get close as I had hoped with the park, but what can I do with the rain? Any suggestions? Anyways how should I approach for a kiss? How should I escalate touching and arm around her? Ask her for a kiss? Attempt in the beginning, middle, or end of the date? I suspect she is a bit on the shy side, but then again I have no idea. She made good convo. But not crazy rowdy party girl. I have only kissed a girl sober once before, where I initiated it. A second time the girl initiated it. Handful of other times I've hooked up drunk while at parties/bars/that kinda stuff which is the easiest of all. But this is a sober date in which we did NOT meet up while partying before and thus no previous intimacy, so I'm nervous as well. I've had some people tell me just progress the touching and play it out. Some said just wait until the end of the date no matter what. Some said it might be ok to ask her if she is shy... hmm
davidL Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I would not recommend asking her. A lot of women expect the man to lead not ask, but thats just my opinion. Anyways, if you are really set on the park date idea which i think is a good 1, just see if she wants to take a rain check so to speak and reschedule for a different day. I know its early on in your guys dating and it might be hard to postpone seeing her but this could make you look nonchalant and cool. If you do do this it should be natural at some point walking next to her you could take her hand, and just escalate the touching slowly but naturally.
Confusedalways Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Do not ask her if you can kiss her!! Someone else said this in a different thread (sorry not sure who it was) but their advice which I think is great advice is when she tells her friends about the kiss, she wants to say "I don't know, it just happened!" Asking is lame! It shows you're not confident. Listen, she accepted your second date. You obviously had a lot of fun together. Maybe you'll loosen up at happy hour, just keep the good eye contact and then maybe later at her car or something just plant one on her. Try not to be nervous
FitChick Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 When you go for a drink find a place that has loveseats or couches so you can sit together. Then touching will naturally flow, i.e. you're excited "You wont' believe what happened next!" so you grab her arm or knee while talking. That seems natural. You could go to a movie and hold her hand in the dark, stroke her arm, arm around shoulder. Walking together hold hands. Crossing the street, you could place your hand on her back to signal to cross. Subtle but effective. I hate having no contact and then being suddenly pounced on at the end of the evening.
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