Author Stakuu Posted May 25, 2010 Author Posted May 25, 2010 Go on a break. Get to know other girls. Either way, you'll be doing her a favor. I don't care about knowing other girls beyond friendship. I just want to screw them. And how will I being doing her a favor?
tkgirl Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Wow...coming here I was expecting to find ways to cope with being a 21 year old hypersexual male who is deeply in love with his gf but still wants a sexual escape. Some of you recommend practically ruining her life so I can screw some girl I don't care about? That's sick. We have an extremely good relationship. We hide very very little. I wasn't expecting such college-age juvenile replies here. ok then... instead of coming on here expecting to find the answer... which you won't, just a bunch of honest opinions... you need to talk to her. Tell her you love her (really?) but want a break so you can date (ie sleep with) other women. You're old enough to know that you can't have your cake and eat it too... so man up anf make a decision already... yeah, it's a risk because she may not be there when you are done having your fun... but that's life. oh, and on another note.. you can't really love someone you don't respect.. just something to think about...
marsle85 Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Right, well wanting to screw and screwing are a huge part of a relationship. So pick a side. If you take a break, and hook up with a few girls- you may find that you're totally in love with your girl and can't see yourself with anyone else. When you return to her, you'll be totally invested instead of this "I love her but I want to screw other girls" BS. Or, you'll play with other girls- realize this arrangement isn't the one for you, and your girl won't have someone who's only half invested.
Author Stakuu Posted May 25, 2010 Author Posted May 25, 2010 When you return to her, you'll be totally invested instead of this "I love her but I want to screw other girls" BS. I want to screw her too, no doubt. I think "I want to screw any attractive female" is just part of being male. Any guy that says otherwise is probably lying.
Author Stakuu Posted May 25, 2010 Author Posted May 25, 2010 Why do I get the feeling that YOU'RE just trolling? We gave you good advice and you called us childish and juvenile. Do you expect us to say you're welcome? Tell me now: what are you gonna do? You're not gonna dump her, you're not gonna cheat on her. What're you gonna do? Yeah..good advice in the form of Kesha lyrics. What am I gonna do? That's what I was hoping to figure out.
Author Stakuu Posted May 25, 2010 Author Posted May 25, 2010 ok then... instead of coming on here expecting to find the answer... which you won't, just a bunch of honest opinions... you need to talk to her. Tell her you love her (really?) but want a break so you can date (ie sleep with) other women. You're old enough to know that you can't have your cake and eat it too... so man up anf make a decision already... yeah, it's a risk because she may not be there when you are done having your fun... but that's life. oh, and on another note.. you can't really love someone you don't respect.. just something to think about... Yeah you're right. Thanks. I guess there's no easy answer. I just wish I weren't so horny.
tkgirl Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Yeah you're right. Thanks. I guess there's no easy answer. I just wish I weren't so horny. yep.. it's good you realize there is no easy answer.. there never is! you're young and being in a relationship is obviously not for you at this point in your life. Sure, you can care deeply about this girl, but you don't really love her... so do her a favor and let her go.. and then you get out there and go with your bad self!
Author Stakuu Posted May 25, 2010 Author Posted May 25, 2010 yep.. it's good you realize there is no easy answer.. there never is! you're young and being in a relationship is obviously not for you at this point in your life. Sure, you can care deeply about this girl, but you don't really love her... so do her a favor and let her go.. and then you get out there and go with your bad self! No, I really love her. 5 years, even at a young age, is enough to know that. And I love her for all the right reasons. Maybe being in a relationship isn't for me at this point. How is it a favor if I let her go?
ADF Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I doubt you have all that much to worry about. The chances of the person you date at 21 becoming the only relationship in your life is practically zero. It almost never happens. I expect your relationship will run aground sooner rather than later. That said, don't think wanting to bed lots of different women is just a "natural" part of being male and something you have no control over. It may be a natural urge, but infidelity will almost always poison any relationship. If you were with another woman, you would likely be under similar pressure to be faithful to her.
CrestfallenNoMore Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Of course you want to be out there, having sex with other women. You're 21. My experience is that someone who desires to sleep with someone else (even if that or those "someone else(s)" aren't even selected yet, that it's going to happen. And that's extremely painful, having been on the receiving end. Statistically, the relationship you're in will end, as most high-school relationships do. And if you go on to marry, it's incredibly likely it will fail. Why? Wisdom is gained through experience. And we gain experiences by having them. Right now, you've just had so few. And I know it seems all-encompassing or even the be-all, end-all, and who you maybe even see yourself with for the rest of your life, but it's just not likely to be. I'm not going to tell you to break up with her, but please try to keep in mind that 21 is YOUNG. I know, I know, it doesn't seem that way, it seems you're maturing, have all the answers and know what you want, without question (as I did at 21) but when you've got another decade or two on you, you'll look back at the you who you are now and shake your head that you thought this was the girl you were going to marry. I know, I don't know you, you know yourself, etc. etc. You have three choices: Break up with her and sow the oats (as you should, at your age) or stay in the relationship and accept that this is "it," or cheat on her. Which one can you live happily with?
Knittress Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I'm not sure you realize that it's entirely possible (common, even) to love someone deeply and not want to be with them -- or even want to be with them, but not want to live the life you'd be leading if you were to be/stay with them. It doesn't sound to me like you LIKE the way things are right now, you're feeling restless and certain aspects of the life you share together are making you unhappy. You worry about 'ruining her life' but you can't live your life for other people. You need to live for you, she needs to live for her, and perhaps the most loving and respectful thing you can do is break it off before you start subconsciously making each other miserable. But definitely talk to her.
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