Dating Myths For Men

[Green]

These are some dating myths that I see men on this site mistakenly believe over and over. Here we go in no particular order feel free to comment or add your own.

 

1) Getting advice from women on dating - Some guys feel they can get advice from women on dating... very bad idea like asking a fish how to catch it... How would the fish no anything about hooks, or bait ect...

 

Its like I see thread after thread of .... LOOKING FOR A WOMANS OPINION... and they want advice about how to gauge some girls interest and how to ask her out.... which brings us too

 

2) Does she Like me? - well you have to make her like you... Ask a girl out show her a good time... kiss... stop looking for the mythical sure thing... most girls won't like you until you've atleast flirted with them and made some moves... and even if a girl does like you there is no way to know.

 

3) I must be ugly I never had a gf - No you must not ask girls out or try which brings us too

 

4) Girls make it clear they like you and either ask you out or do something that makes you ask them out - No, girls arn't going to make it clear... so you need to ask them out... don't expect them to ask you or do something really clear like "boy I wish some one would ask me out..

 

5) Rejection - the guys who fear rejection most have not ever really been rejected much if at all because they never ask girls out or flirt with them... They have the mistaken belief that it is scary and the end of the world to get rejected and that if you screw up with one girl they will all talk to each other and black ball you... while in reality you can screw up with one girl and go back to that very same girl on a different day under different circimstances and it will all work out...

 

6) Nice guys- There is no such thing as a nice guy it is a subjective term. Just because a girl turns you down while saying you are a nice guy doesn't mean you have to obsess over that and think being a jerk is a requirement to get a girl. Seriously its very self absorbed to think like this. More often then not a guy wasn't even turned down while being a nice guy. He just believes he is a nice guy for who knows what reason and focus's on that as the imaginary reason he can not find a date... then he goes around labeling every man in the world who does well with women a jerk... because of who knows what reason they never really explain themselves IMO

 

7) Making friends with girls will lead to dating - No, if you are single you need to be flirty and romantic with any girl you find attractive as long as there isn't some good reason you shouldn't be such as dating/married to a friend... work ect... You can't befriend your way into some ones life and then expect it to magicaly become romantic...

 

8) The Friend Zone - You don't get stuck in the friend zone as a man... you put yourself there by being afraid of rejection. You can always go after a girl by KISSING HER and that will put her in a possision to either continue hanging out with this guy who is touching her/ flirting with her and yes kisssing her lips or she will reject you... Guys who say they are Stuck in the friend zone put THEMSELVES there by being to afraid to lose the pointless friendship... and it is pointless if you want more...

 

9) Where do you meet girls? - I love it. I see a variation on this question all the time.... Seriously they are all over the place. If you go to the mall to buy something... you will probably see an attractive girl... Just go up and approach her... yes it will be awkward but enjoy the excitment that something MAY come from it.... which brings us too

 

10) ASK GIRLS OUT --- Most guys don't even ask girls out... they just come on here and complain

[FitChick]

If I have the choice between buying a book about how to attract men written by a man and another one written by a woman, I will buy the one written by the man. That's the reason He's Just Not That Into You became a best seller.

[St. Nick]

Thanks Green, I agree with everything you posted. I'll add my own myths soon.

[Woggle]

If I have the choice between buying a book about how to attract men written by a man and another one written by a woman, I will buy the one written by the man. That's the reason He's Just Not That Into You became a best seller.

 

Men tend to be much moe honest and truthful about what we like than women are. Some women are living in opposite world when it comes to giving advice on love.

[Green]

If I have the choice between buying a book about how to attract men written by a man and another one written by a woman, I will buy the one written by the man. That's the reason He's Just Not That Into You became a best seller.

 

That has nothing to do with taking you dating advice from women if you are a man... For the most part its a figure it out yourself type thing, and a watch what sucsesful men do not so much as ask.

 

Men tend to be much moe honest and truthful about what we like than women are. Some women are living in opposite world when it comes to giving advice on love.

 

So true

 

Thanks Green, I agree with everything you posted. I'll add my own myths soon.

 

look foward to it

[Ihavenoidea]

I like how 90% of greens post involve "KISS HER"

[Green]

11. That you need to be successful to get an attractive woman. There are attractive women everywhere, who are lonely as hell, who would date an assistant manager at Dairy Queen if he'd just talk to her and make her laugh.

 

12. That you should get to know a woman well before getting her number. I've read many stories where guys complain that they talked to a woman for around 30 minutes only to have her give her number to a dude who spoke to her for 10 minutes. Those dudes fail to see that you should talk to a woman no more than 10 minutes before asking for the number. Talking longer is just dragging it out and it's liable to bore her and make her less likely to give out the digits.

 

I like your 11 a lot... wish I had said it... I mean you don't even need a job to get a gf.. it helps though lol

 

You are onto something with number 12 I just feel it needs reworking... but yeah a lot of guys do feel they need to have this long drawn out conversation just to ask a girl out.... less is more especialy if you have run out of things to say

[Green]

I like how 90% of greens post involve "KISS HER"

 

Well I hope you agree. I just feel like a lot of guys sell themselves short by going on a first date and letting it end without even trying this. You have to atleast lean in and give it a good try. If you get ur face close and the girl doesn't move away you're already half way there then just go in for the kiss. If you end a date without trying a girl might not even realize it was a date

[janie423]

Well I hope you agree. I just feel like a lot of guys sell themselves short by going on a first date and letting it end without even trying this. You have to atleast lean in and give it a good try. If you get ur face close and the girl doesn't move away you're already half way there then just go in for the kiss. If you end a date without trying a girl might not even realize it was a date

 

 

excellent point . . .

[Ihavenoidea]

Well I hope you agree. I just feel like a lot of guys sell themselves short by going on a first date and letting it end without even trying this. You have to atleast lean in and give it a good try. If you get ur face close and the girl doesn't move away you're already half way there then just go in for the kiss. If you end a date without trying a girl might not even realize it was a date

 

I do i just think its funny. If I like her Ill kiss her if not i might do a hug or a see ya later haha

[janie423]

I do i just think its funny. If I like her Ill kiss her if not i might do a hug or a see ya later haha

 

what you do makes sense, if you don't like her and you kiss her you might confuse her . . .

[MrNate]

Green keeping it real like always.

[Cracker Jack]

8) The Friend Zone - You don't get stuck in the friend zone as a man... you put yourself there by being afraid of rejection. You can always go after a girl by KISSING HER and that will put her in a possision to either continue hanging out with this guy who is touching her/ flirting with her and yes kisssing her lips or she will reject you... Guys who say they are Stuck in the friend zone put THEMSELVES there by being to afraid to lose the pointless friendship... and it is pointless if you want more...

 

I respectfully disagree here, though I get your point.

 

Rejection was always the last thing on my mind when I asked out a friend, but the answer was the same. And to be honest, early on, I wasn't attracted to them as much. The friendship just seemed to build the attraction.

 

I did share a kiss with one of them (Out of the ones who didn't want to go further than friendship) and it was nice...but she resented me afterwards because it was a "rude thing" on my part, even though it was a mutual thing. She thought I put her in a tough spot, I guess.

 

Sorta puts a damper on my aggressiveness to kiss a girl who I like. Or should I just not care and do it anyway? I've seen guys get slapped silly while doing this, too.

[alphamale]

yes i rubber stamp all these points

[Green]

I do i just think its funny. If I like her Ill kiss her if not i might do a hug or a see ya later haha

 

Yeah my advice is for if you like a girl... very few guys need help rejecting a girl although I did see a post about that earlier and took it as bragging

 

Green keeping it real like always.

 

I try

 

I respectfully disagree here, though I get your point.

 

Rejection was always the last thing on my mind when I asked out a friend, but the answer was the same. And to be honest, early on, I wasn't attracted to them as much. The friendship just seemed to build the attraction.

 

I did share a kiss with one of them (Out of the ones who didn't want to go further than friendship) and it was nice...but she resented me afterwards because it was a "rude thing" on my part, even though it was a mutual thing. She thought I put her in a tough spot, I guess.

 

Sorta puts a damper on my aggressiveness to kiss a girl who I like. Or should I just not care and do it anyway? I've seen guys get slapped silly while doing this, too.

 

You need to do what you want. You are never STUCK IN A FRIEND ZONE.... You yourself have a right to walk away from the friendship after you have tried kissing and gotten bored of being rejected.

 

If you get slapped which rarely happens... you just shouldn't care.

 

yes i rubber stamp all these points

 

Glad that you read this and stamped it

[sally4sara]

#13. The advise your dude gave you that worked with one girl isn't likely to work with another girl unless you like his leftovers.

 

#14. Even if honesty doesn't work; adhering to it will leave you without guilty feelings. If they don't wanna hear it, forget em.

 

#15. Being yourself won't get you every girl, but you won't be losing the ones you do get because you fraudulently sold them the persona of some other dude and couldn't keep up the act in the long term.

 

#16. If you can't close, you are not properly assessing your selling points or advertising them well.

 

#17. being a jerk will only get you irritating women. The women who respond to jerks are more likely to be carrying the stds/baggage other jerks left behind.

 

But don't listen to me - I'm a woman.

[Engadget]

7) Has worked for me before without even trying, so I disagree with it.

 

I was good friends with a girl in high school until she asked me to have sex, and it developed from there.

[sally4sara]

Thank you. That's exactly what I was about to say.

 

You deserve every "insult" and "character attack" you get on here Nick. If you ever really believed people were being unduly mean and not just responding to your nasty personality - you just showed yourself right here. This here is the far worse reason why guys won't always get good advice from other guys either.

 

But seriously, women do give terrible dating advice to men (and sometimes even to other women). If a man wants advice on how to pick up chicks, why should he get it from women? That's like getting advice on how to cook a BBQ from a vegetarian.

 

Because she knows what she has responded to in the past and what has repelled her - DUH. Even if she isn't self examined enough to be honest about what she has responded to - she sure knows what turned her off and those things should be considered.

[janie423]

You deserve every "insult" and "character attack" you get on here Nick. If you ever really believed people were being unduly mean and not just responding to your nasty personality - you just showed yourself right here. This here is the far worse reason why guys won't always get good advice from other guys either.

 

 

 

Because she knows what she has responded to in the past and what has repelled her - DUH. Even if she isn't self examined enough to be honest about what she has responded to - she sure knows what turned her off and those things should be considered.

 

I thought of that too sally . . how does a guy know how a woman will respond to a man's actions - how can he make any expert claims on the inner workings of the heart/mind of the opposite gender? he simply cannot . . .

[Pyro]

I thought of that too sally . . how does a guy know how a woman will respond to a man's actions - how can he make any expert claims on the inner workings of the heart/mind of the opposite gender? he simply cannot . . .

 

because some guys think they will be looked at as weak if they listen to women.

 

Women don't have all the answers for dating, nor do the guys. There is NOTHING wrong with getting opinions/advice from both genders.

[janie423]

because some guys think they will be looked at as weak if they listen to women.

 

Women don't have all the answers for dating, nor do the guys. There is NOTHING wrong with getting opinions/advice from both genders.

 

I don't understand this at all . . . absurd

 

and I agree, advice from both genders could help, but I still don't believe men can be experts on how a woman responds to male actions (and conversely)

[sweetjasmine]

Looks like someone's missing their sense of humor. Did you notice I put a smiley face after my statement?

 

In any case, the reason why men get bad advice from women is because women tend to contradict themselves in one sentence or blatantly lie to make themselves look better. Men are more honest with their dating advice. How many women have I met who say they don't wanna date a cock jerk end up falling head over heels in love with one? I don't know. I lost count back in high school.

 

Ok, I'm calling your bluff.

 

Go read sally4sara's list of advice and show us where she's contradicting herself and/or lying to make herself look better.

 

It's funny how you think so lowly of women and don't respect them but still expect them to like you.

[janie423]

Honestly, most guys don't care about the inner workings of a woman's heart or mind. Even most nice guys could care less about that. We're just trying to get info on how to get her in bed. That's all. A player is gonna give you the best info because he's actually done it.

 

 

newsflash: a woman knows better how a man will get her in bed than anyone else . . . regardless of his experience or his relative callousness.

[sally4sara]

Men are more honest with their dating advice.

 

I'm glad your dating experience with men has gone so well.....

[hats]

Who's going to know the best way to sell something, the buyer or the salesman?