billythekid Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 (edited) I'm curious to know from others if dating a 19yr could work, given all the circumstances. I'm a 29yr old guy, and well into my career... and the girl in question is 19 and going to start her 2nd yr of Uni. So basically this past week I ran into this girl at work, I was providing support, and she had called. She's one of those people that knocks you off your feet, she's incredibly gorgeous, and seemed to have a humorous/outgoing personality. I tried to engage in as much conversation as I could, but it's a busy environment so not too much was exchanged, though she did make an effort to say bye. After talking with some colleagues, I found out she's a student at a University about 150km from where I live, and she's 19. That kind of sunk my boat a bit... me being 29, and I just wanted to grab some other opinions on anything working between those ages. Obvisouly we are both on different pages. I've already experience a TON in the past 10 years, and her being 19... she's got a lot to experience. The whole going out each weekend with buddies, I've done from 19 to my mid 20's. I've backpacked with friends overseas, and now I'm into my career. Her being 19 and in her 2nd year at Uni... she's probably doing what I did back then... or maybe not. Last year I got out of a 4yr relationship with someone my own age, and before that I had a few short term relationships... so I'm all too familiar with heartbreak and my gut tells me that's where this would head (not that I'm trying to be pessimistic). I'm not looking to settle down anytime soon myself, would like to travel more, but I also know deep down that we are on different pages. When I was 22-23 I went out with a few 18yr olds, and the only thing I remember was how immature they were, but I know everyone is different. I'm not the jealous type... but with someone being 150km's away, in a University filled with people partying, I'll admit it would be difficult, and I'm guessing seeing each other a few times a month on weekends. So... could this work? or would it be headed for heartbreak? as my gut tells me. She is headed back to University at the end of the summer, 150km's away. Any advice, opinions welcome. Thanks in advance. Cheers. Edited May 23, 2010 by billythekid
jthorne Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 She's still practically a teenager. Granted, I was a mature 19 year old, and acted like a lot of 30 year old women, but I did not have the life experiences to back that up. If you had said she's 30 and you're 40, I'd be more optimistic about a long term relationship.
lov3_5pell Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 Well, I think it could work. I'm 20 and I prefer dating someone your age. But that's not the point, I guess, it would depend on how mature she is. Some girls around that age still want to party and meet young hotties and go to parties. But some girls, similar to me, aren't about that whole "scene". So I think it really depends on who she is and what she wants. If she's mature and does want to get to know you, is interested in YOU, it COULD definitely work! But if she's just experimenting with an older gentleman, like yourself, and doesn't take this as a serious relationship, but more of a fling, then obviously, it won't work. There's nothing wrong with finding out.
Art_Critic Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 She is a teenager NINETEEN... I think there is more than age that cast doubt over things.. Long distance relationships are tough when you have both party's on the same page, but she will most likely never be on the same page as you and that will kill the LDR... This is a girl you only met in a work environment.. do you even know if she would date someone almost 30 ? Personally I was nowhere near the same place as a teenager as I was a full blown adult and could never have dated someone that young.. 10 years is okay when the younger side of it doesn't turn into dating a person who is really a child growing up... there is so much a 19 year old has to experience to find out what direction they want to take their life..
You Go Girl Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 Forget about it. Young women change their minds faster than the weather, I know, I once was one.
Art_Critic Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 Forget about it. Young women change their minds faster than the weather, I know, I once was one. That's a good point too.. He might be yesterday's boytoy in less than a week
You Go Girl Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 That's a good point too.. He might be yesterday's boytoy in less than a week It's not malicious, devious, or thought out or planned--don't give them machievelian credit where none is due, lol It's simple fickleness. Young women just want attention and to begin to learn how to use their brains and their relationship skills. It's a discovery process for them. I imagine the same for young men.
somedude81 Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 So not only is there a big age difference there's also the matter of life experience and a long distance thing. BTW I don't think that age is the only factor. Women can and do date men much older than them. I'm actually going to be 29 when the fall semester starts. Since I went back to school and I'm working on my undergrad, 90% of the girls I meet are 18-22. So those are the girls I'm trying to date.
You Go Girl Posted May 23, 2010 Posted May 23, 2010 So not only is there a big age difference there's also the matter of life experience and a long distance thing. BTW I don't think that age is the only factor. Women can and do date men much older than them. I'm actually going to be 29 when the fall semester starts. Since I went back to school and I'm working on my undergrad, 90% of the girls I meet are 18-22. So those are the girls I'm trying to date. Either don't expect anything long term, or definitely choose the 22 over the 18 year olds. Just like you have returned to school, so have women. Look around the U. There are older choices besides the too young to order a drink crowd.
Author billythekid Posted May 23, 2010 Author Posted May 23, 2010 Some good points, especially someone as young as her changing her mind faster then the weather... I know that dating someone that young, I can't expect a lot... or maybe I'm wrong. It sucks because it's almost like looking through a window at something that you know you can't have, or wouldn't work out, but you'd like to try so bad. And I know my gut telling me it would end in a heart break, is probably right, once she realizes she wants to go in a different direction in life, or see the world more. Why do I have to be 29 Thanks for the replies.
Laugher Posted May 24, 2010 Posted May 24, 2010 I met my ex when I was 19 and he was 27. We stayed together for 3 happy years and the break up was nothing to do with age. It really depends on the people involved. Age was never an issue for us. On another note....I think your getting ahead of yourself though talking about relationships and long distance just because she made an effort to say goog bye to you.
marsle85 Posted May 24, 2010 Posted May 24, 2010 I was seeing a 29 year old when I was 19... needless to say, we weren't serious and I didn't see him a potential bf. BUT, he also wasn't bf material. I'm nearly 21 now, and I would easily date someone your age.
skydiveaddict Posted May 24, 2010 Posted May 24, 2010 Here's how ya do it: Half your age plus seven. So you 29/2 = 15. Add seven to that and you get 22. Dont date anyone younger than 22
Jersey Shortie Posted May 24, 2010 Posted May 24, 2010 Yeah, live your life by some bs equation. I hate that crap. You are 29. She is 19. Let her be 19. Would you have wanted to date a 29 year old when you were 19? She has so many experiences ahead of her. People change ALOT from 19-25.
Green Posted May 24, 2010 Posted May 24, 2010 Dude when I'm 70 if I see some 19 year old who is hot and I'm single I'll take a go at it..... the difference is you still have a chance... I think the sex will work out great... deep conversations and a life togather ... not so likely but still posible
Green Posted May 24, 2010 Posted May 24, 2010 Yeah, live your life by some bs equation. I hate that crap. You are 29. She is 19. Let her be 19. Would you have wanted to date a 29 year old when you were 19? She has so many experiences ahead of her. People change ALOT from 19-25. She can turn him down herself... he won't be the last older man who takes a go
Recommended Posts