jakinbandw Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 So yeah. My first girlfriend ever invited me out last night with a few of her friends. So we went out to the bar were we met, and then she suggested that we have a sleepover. I agreed of course (I might not be in a relationship for sex but that doesn't mean I will turn it down!) and her best female friend was free as well. No one else was. We all ended up in the same room with me sharing a bed with my girlfriend. I figured nothing would happen because well, there was another person in the room. After we turned off the lights for a few minutes though, me and my girlfriend began to make out. Pretty heavily. After we stopped her bff in embarrassment mentioned that she had been awake the whole time. Then proceeded to join us in bed. I take responsibility for what happened, I initiated some playing between her and I with my GF in the middle. It was sort of joking at first, but then it went further until her and I were making out, and both trying to pull my GF into it. My GF got up and walked away, "to get some iced tea." We both stopped, and went to make sure she was okay. Long story short my GF (who I will call Mandy) had some bad experiences in three-ways before, and wasn't in the mood right then. On the other hand she was willing to wait and give it a try some other time. Mandy's friend (who I shall call Shelly) was hoping for a 3 way some time in the future. Or at least as hard as she could without pushing Mandy into something she didn't want. The whole thing had almost been resolved when I voiced my concern. That I want to have sex something special between me and my girlfriend, and if we didn't discount a 3-way in the future I would have to start calling Shelly my girlfriend. Both agreed. They also agreed to date each other as both are bi. Shelly has had a crush on Mandy for a year now, and had a minor one on me when I move here. So here I am, Just got back home. Where could I get good reference material to help me with this? I don't know if Mandy is into it, or just going along. She has had some bad past experience, and she was pretty passive about the whole thing, but when Holly and I waited she agreed eventually. Should we just keep going like normal, or should we do something different? Are there any ground rules that we should establish? Essentially, what do I do now?
Green Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 I think you need to have the threesome and come back and tell us about it. Make sure you do that thing where you are doing one girl doggie style and the girll you are doing doggie style is eating the other girl out. Also have them both lick ur dick at the same time.... Also order them to do stuff to each other like scisor and kiss eachothers boobs and pull eachothers hair.. and finaly make sure you do that thing where you are eating one girl out whil screwing the other... also maybe have them both bend over for you and screw one for a minut or twoo and then screw the other for a minute or twoo... Be as perverse as you can!
legallyblonde289 Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 is this the same girl that in previous posts you said you were only dating a week and hadnt even kissed yet? i think you are opening a can of worms that will potentially ruin your relationship...
Green Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 is this the same girl that in previous posts you said you were only dating a week and hadnt even kissed yet? i think you are opening a can of worms that will potentially ruin your relationship... Havn't read that thread... but he described this girl as his frist gf
Author jakinbandw Posted May 22, 2010 Author Posted May 22, 2010 @leagallyblond: Well, yes it is. she is also the same one that told me that she was having a sleepover and that I would be sleeping in her bed. Also, I have kissed her since that post. So you think that after all was said and done I should have just said that we should forget anything ever happened and move on with my relationship between me and Mandy? Wouldn't that have hurt Shelly? And Green... No. Just no.
Green Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 And Green... No. Just no. So I'm confused if you don't want one... what are you even thinking about... A love triangle?
legallyblonde289 Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 @leagallyblond: Well, yes it is. she is also the same one that told me that she was having a sleepover and that I would be sleeping in her bed. Also, I have kissed her since that post. . well do you have feelings for shelly? does she have feelings for you? do you want be with her as well? are you ok with the two of them dating each other (no jealousy)? or is this mainly about sex? what you're proposing is a polyamorous relationship where you are all dating each other, so i would probably do some research on that. i can't see this ending up well but then again i'm not the kind of person that could have that type of relationship without utterly tearing me apart, but maybe the three of you are. that's what i think you need to figure out for yourself. p.s. mtv did a true life about polyamorous relationship that showed different types and the difficulties they face, something you might want to consider googling and watching before you make your decision so you know what you are getting into
lovelorcet Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 It sounds like she was trying really hard to be "cool" with things but in the end was not "cool" at all with the idea that you were trying to reach over her to get a piece of her bff. If you were really into this girl you would be focused on her, obviously you are not...
legallyblonde289 Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 So I'm confused if you don't want one... what are you even thinking about... A love triangle? i think he mean's a polyamorous relationship, where they all date each other. the girls already agreed to date each other. thats why i think its a can of worms. if it was just a one time threesome id say go for it
Author jakinbandw Posted May 22, 2010 Author Posted May 22, 2010 @green: I suppose that's not that I don't want one. I mean it's every mans dream. But until that I am sure that everyone is comfortable with a love triangle I don't want to start thinking about that. As I said on another thread, to me in a relationship, sex is secondary bonus that comes with a good relationship. Though I may be a hippocryte because when Shelly climbed into bed I could have just done nothing and let her bravery go to waste. Shelly has never dated before, and to climb into bed with two of your crushes must have taken a supreme effort of will. And the thing is that I like Shelly a bit too... Well, more than a bit. We all were friends before this, it was just that I was dating and committed to Mandy. I essentially chose to ask Mandy out, and so I wasn't looking for another girl. Now that one essentially through herself at the both of us. Both Mandy and I, I didn't know how to respond and initiated making out. Now I have to decide what to do about it? Do I walk away leaving the girl hurt? That would be pretty jerkish on top of everything else. Do I agree to a three way in the future like my Mandy and Shelly already had? No, I still believe that sex should be about love. So that leaves me with this option. Definanatly one I find wonderful, but also quite scary!
Author jakinbandw Posted May 22, 2010 Author Posted May 22, 2010 @legallyblond: We right now are in something of a trial phase. We are all dating each-other as both girls are bi. This being the reason that i went for it initially, because Mandy has talked quite a bit about having sex with girls. Also I assumed that Shelly knew Mandy's safe zone better than me, I think I was wrong about that. Also we have an opt-out clause type thing going that if any one of us feels uncomfortable in the first while we break it off right away and decide what happens from there.
EricaH329 Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 well do you have feelings for shelly? does she have feelings for you? do you want be with her as well? are you ok with the two of them dating each other (no jealousy)? or is this mainly about sex? what you're proposing is a polyamorous relationship where you are all dating each other, so i would probably do some research on that. i can't see this ending up well but then again i'm not the kind of person that could have that type of relationship without utterly tearing me apart, but maybe the three of you are. that's what i think you need to figure out for yourself. p.s. mtv did a true life about polyamorous relationship that showed different types and the difficulties they face, something you might want to consider googling and watching before you make your decision so you know what you are getting into This is what it sounds like to me. A polyamorous relationship. J - I'd highly suggest doing some research into this.
legallyblonde289 Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 i see, well thats a good plan at least. i would just be careful to try and be in tune with mandy's feelings (i'm assuming she's the one you care about the most) and talk to her if you see any signals of uncomfort or jealousy, even if she doesn't explicitly come right out and tell you. we girls have a tendency to simmer with things we're upset about before we bring them up
Author jakinbandw Posted May 22, 2010 Author Posted May 22, 2010 @Leagallyblond: I plan too. Also since Shelly also cares more for Mandy right now than me I know that she will watch as well. I was honest and upfront about that with them though. I said to Shelly in front of Mandy "If it comes down to it right now and I had to choose, I will choose Mandy." And she agreed completely. I will try to watch for any sign of problems from Mandy, though what I will do if she denies that she has any problems if I have to confront her about it, I do not know...
legallyblonde289 Posted May 22, 2010 Posted May 22, 2010 if you sense she is uncomfortable or not dealing with it well, and you ask her about it i think its very likely that she will tell you. so i wouldnt worry too much if you ask her and is like no im fine (as long as she looks you in the eyes when she says it). i think its very good that you told her shelly mandy is #1 so everyone knows what they are getting into. i wish you luck
Author jakinbandw Posted May 23, 2010 Author Posted May 23, 2010 This is what it sounds like to me. A polyamorous relationship. J - I'd highly suggest doing some research into this. After looking it up a little bit more, I feel that it is a subset called Polyfidelity. Thank you wikipedia! I met up with shelly last night for a bit, and we talked. We are both very worried about Mandy. Shelly is planning to meet up with her today and talk it over with her. Anyway we will see how we feel at the end of this week. If we agree, we will be in a long term poly relationship.
IronMaiden Posted May 26, 2010 Posted May 26, 2010 Now THAT would be one reality show worth watching...
Crazy Magnet Posted June 3, 2010 Posted June 3, 2010 I know a woman who was involved in a situation like this. She moved in with a couple and they all dated and slept with each other. Sometimes it was all three of them, sometimes just the two women, and sometimes the man and one of the women. It went on for quite some time and everybody was cool with it. Sorry I don't have more details of how things worked, but this seemed sort of inappropriate to pry about. It's probably not very common, but it does happen successfully (for a while anyway).
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