Going Home For The First Time Since LDR Ended , Will See Ex For The 1st Time :s

[TooMuchPride]

Hi...its me AGAIN...ha.

 

I started a long distance relationship last summer. It went something like (distance wise) : 2 months together , 2 apart , 1 together , 2 apart , BREAKUP. I still havent gotten completely over it although its been almost 3 months since...I'll be home next week and I will see him whether I want too or not. I do think if I was there we would still be together...and I have expressed my feelings to him since the break up and ended up hurt..he is enjoying the single life as far as I can tell..and i cut off contact , Ever since I discovered he has been going out of his way to flirt with any girl he knew I was close to , I Wish i knew why he would do that (maybe one of you guys do) :s .He sent so many mixed signals I didn't know what to do...he'd start telling me about other girls(i didnt know if this was to make me jealous or hurt my feelings , or if he was simply tryna say **** off, because i never initiated the convos or asked about the other girls , it was random) , then he would bring up the fact that i'm talking to guys implicitly like he was jealous, he got mad when I said we weren't getting back together (I thought that was what he wanted)....Then at the same time he is so cold and disrespectful to me at times and has MANY girls none of which he commits too...Im seeking help on what the hell is going on with him...does he care or not?..if i get mad and say i'm done talking to him he will leave it and not care..but a lot of people think we are going to get back together when I go home..I don't want to , but I know ill be crushed if he makes no attempt...im asking how do i deal with the first time seeing him when i go home after 5 months of not seeing him...do I even say hello?..and is this relationship really through?..keep in mind we are both young...both 18.

 

hope this isn't too long , thank you.