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So I've had 3 dates with this guy...


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Posted

So far so good.

He asked me to fly to Colorado to a concert in 6 weeks....if I accept, is it assuming that we will be intimate on the trip?

I don't know if I will be ready for that yet, but kind of want to go since he wants me to go with him (and he's paying for everything, not that this matters.)

So sex isn't expected in this case, right?

Posted
So far so good.

He asked me to fly to Colorado to a concert in 6 weeks....if I accept, is it assuming that we will be intimate on the trip?

 

Well, it is assuming that you will go with him to a concert. It's hard to say what he's agenda is. How long have you known each other? If a were a girl and a guy would ask me after three dates to fly with him somewhere it'd be too much too soon...

Posted

A man who invites you on a trip out of town is absolutely, positively, 100% expecting you to get intimate.

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Posted

I've known him 3 weeks. But if we're still seeing each other in 6 weeks, that would be 9 weeks. He bought the ticket with the hope he would meet someone special to take to the concert, and he seems kinda smitten so far. ;) Don't know how smitten I am yet though, but I'm the type of person that it takes a while and then I fall hard.

Posted
I've known him 3 weeks. But if we're still seeing each other in 6 weeks, that would be 9 weeks. He bought the ticket with the hope he would meet someone special to take to the concert, and he seems kinda smitten so far. ;) Don't know how smitten I am yet though, but I'm the type of person that it takes a while and then I fall hard.

 

Yeah... too much too soon... :o Just take it easy and savor the moments!

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Posted

So you would say no? This trip sounds really fun.

Posted
So you would say no? This trip sounds really fun.

 

I would say no. Yes, the trip may sound like fun but do you really know him? How much time in total (hours) have you spent with him? I am not talking about him being covertly a psycho, I am just saying what if the trip doesn't turn out to be as much fun as you expected?

 

On the other hand it is 6 weeks from now...

 

I am a huge fan of a rule that says that you should only plan ahead as far as 1/4 of the time you've been with a person.

 

Why? Well, in January I dated a fantastic girl. We were very happy together but then I found out that I'll have to move to Cali and since we have known each other only for 2.5 months we decided that it is rather better to end things now (late January) than in August. By that time I booked a trip to Chicago for Valentine's Day. We ended up going there as friends and this really didn't help in the break-up/recovery process. Moreover, we made plans in January to run a marathon in June together. I always imagined that if she'd struggle on the last part (it'd be her first), I'd carry her to the finish line. Well, I'm gonna run the marathon - she got injured so she can't.

 

My point is. Plan ahead only a fraction of time for which you've known the person.

Posted

I say go for it, it's 6 weeks away thats a long time to get to know somebody and decide whether or not you want to go on the trip, If at the last minute you decide you don't, then just don't go it's not like he's expecting you to pay for it or anything.

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Posted

OK. I sort of feel if the "feeling" isn't there for me, at least I'll see a great concert and have fun in Colorado for a few days.

Posted
OK. I sort of feel if the "feeling" isn't there for me, at least I'll see a great concert and have fun in Colorado for a few days.

 

Isn't that a little cynical and manipulative? You don't really like the guy, but you'll lead him on long enough to get a nice trip out of him? That's pretty cold.

Posted

It's six weeks away - is it not possible that you will have sex before then?

 

I'm getting the impression that you really aren't very excited about this guy.

Posted
So far so good.

He asked me to fly to Colorado to a concert in 6 weeks....if I accept, is it assuming that we will be intimate on the trip?

I don't know if I will be ready for that yet, but kind of want to go since he wants me to go with him (and he's paying for everything, not that this matters.)

So sex isn't expected in this case, right?

 

 

 

I think you should wait until you're ready for that. Regardless of what kind of date it is.

Posted
I've known him 3 weeks. But if we're still seeing each other in 6 weeks, that would be 9 weeks. He bought the ticket with the hope he would meet someone special to take to the concert, and he seems kinda smitten so far. ;) Don't know how smitten I am yet though, but I'm the type of person that it takes a while and then I fall hard.

 

 

I'm not feeling how he purchased the tickets in "hopes" he'd meet someone to actually bring to the ticket. Who does that? Especially knowing the concert is out of town... sounds strange to me, I don't like it.

Posted

All expenses paid by the man and the woman doesnt take the offer?

 

What is the world coming to??

Posted
I say go for it, it's 6 weeks away thats a long time to get to know somebody and decide whether or not you want to go on the trip, If at the last minute you decide you don't, then just don't go it's not like he's expecting you to pay for it or anything.

 

I agree. If things fizzle out before then, don't go. If things heat up then you'll have a fantastic time.

  • Author
Posted

I have talked to him and told him I'd go. He booked the plane ticket, at which I asked to pay for myself. He reluctantly agreed and stated "No obligations, don't know where we'll be at that point, I just wanted to share this concert and trip with someone cool who would appreciate it."

 

So he probably sensed my hesitations and doubts, but now I'm thrilled, I am just looking at a fun 3 day trip to Colorado to see a cool concert with a friend, if he happens to be more by then, great, too. There will be separate beds but I can always get my own hotel room, barring the hotel isn't sold out.

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