Els Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Women never become emotionally attached to guys. Most women couldn't care less if their boyfriend/husband just left. Geez, I gave your trolling 2/10 up to this point. Now it's -1/10.
Twenty-ten Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Women never become emotionally attached to guys. Most women couldn't care less if their boyfriend/husband just left. Fox, I can't say anything to that, it's your vision and nothing I can say will change that. Even if I were to explain to you that we do become emotionally attached and as our trust grows and our emotions strengthen we become more and more focused on pleasing our men, it wouldn't matter you wouldn't believe me anyway. Sorry but when I encounter people who see life, people, and things in extremes I just don't make the effort to fight them on it. They see what they see, and that's pretty much that. LOL. I meant the average man is going to meet more women than the average woman is going to meet men. You knew what I meant. Quit bs-ing. I know I was just teasing you. The line made me LOL
carhill Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Why don't women ever initiate anything? I think *don't ever* is a pretty strong and sweeping phrase, but will address the dynamic. It boils down to two essential truths. 1. Path of least resistance 2. Biological imperative 1. It's *easier* for me to sit here typing this post than go out and mow the lawn. Nice and cool in here. Hot and dirty out there. Besides, the chicken burrito I fixed is quite yummy. In the case of women, because they *can* attract men without approaching them, they do. I've noted, in life, the ones who generally have more trouble attracting men tend to be more proactive, all else being equal. 2. Men are socialized and biologically driven to pursue. We pursue everything, whether it be pounding an opponent on the football field, to getting the best degree and the highest paying job to marrying the perfect mother and having the most gorgeous, successful and socially popular children. We compete for that every day from the day we're old enough to watch our fathers (or other male role models) do it and train us. What dad isn't proud of junior getting laid ('son, use a condom, good boy')? A young man's 'success' is defined by his social popularity in school, his achievements and his ability to successfully pursue women and 'get laid'. So, with all that in mind, as a man, I know, 1. women are always going to have other men pursuing them sexually, so the women have little need to be proactive in that regard and, 2. I know my fellow men aren't going to wait around to see what I'm doing and who I'm approaching. Their goal is to beat me in every sense of the word, whether physically, mentally or emotionally. It is the male imperative. Watch male 'friends' sometime and see what I mean. Even when they're having 'fun', there's an undercurrent of competition. Watch what happens when a woman enters the room, even when the room is full of married men. Just watch. It's a blast. That's why women don't initiate anything. Simple. I accept the negotiated fee
St. Nick Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Women have more sexual partners than men. Thats what counts. I wouldn't know about that. I sort of disagree. But I won't get into why I disagree. It doesn't matter if women have more sexual partners, they generally don't value sex with multiple partners as much as men do. If they did then they wouldn't insist on having a long-term polygamous relationship with a man.
Ihavenoidea Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Oddly enough thinking back on all my relationships I have to tend to agree with some of this. I disagree with the communication part. I have had mixed results with women initiating the calls or texts but it the beginning its me. In ALL my dating or relaionships I had to be the one to initiate anything physical. Holding hands, kissing, a hug, even sex. I had to do it all. One girlfriend i had we would never have sex unless I started it, in fact I even waited a month and she never even said anything. My last girlfriend said she wanted it all the time but never did anything to excite me, she just said she wanted it and that was it, I either got naked or didnt. It would kind of me nice if the woman took my hand, gave me the kiss, or got naked for me LOL
St. Nick Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 It would kind of me nice if the woman took my hand, gave me the kiss, or got naked for me LOL You can find a woman to do that for you in just about any brothel in Nevada.
BeautifulMan Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Dude you're going about it the wrong way. I haven't initiated any of my relationships since 3rd grade, it drives them wild being who you are yet appearing unattracted to them.
FitChick Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Sorry but when I encounter people who see life, people, and things in extremes I just don't make the effort to fight them on it. They see what they see, and that's pretty much that. Hence, my signature below.
phineas Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Dude you're going about it the wrong way. I haven't initiated any of my relationships since 3rd grade, it drives them wild being who you are yet appearing unattracted to them. This is what i've found. Just be myself, do my own thing. Don't let on you think their attractive, don't compliment their looks ever either. Talk to them, be friendly, make them laugh, pick on the just a little & walk away without asking them out. basically act like you arn't interested. first 6 months of my seperation I really wasn't interested & they wouldn't leave me alone. Looking back at my pictures then I was quite overweight also so I have no idea why they were interested in me.
Author FoxMulder Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 You can find a woman to do that for you in just about any brothel in Nevada. Maybe some guys don't want a whore but a real woman? Maybe some guys want their girlfriend or wife to initiate sex or initiate a kiss or initiate any kind of intimacy instead of you being the one to initiate all those things every single time and not some whore in Vegas? If you get what I'm saying...
St. Nick Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Maybe some guys don't want a whore but a real woman? Maybe some guys want their girlfriend or wife to initiate sex or initiate a kiss or initiate any kind of intimacy instead of you being the one to initiate all those things every single time and not some whore in Vegas? If you get what I'm saying... A whore isn't a real woman? Hmm. Learn something new everyday. How do you know the woman you want to initiate discussion with isn't secretly a whore? You can't tell a woman's sexual past just by looking at them, you know. By the way, there aren't any brothels in Vegas, since prostitution is illegal in that city.
carhill Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 This is what i've found. Just be myself, do my own thing. Don't let on you think their attractive, don't compliment their looks ever either. Talk to them, be friendly, make them laugh, pick on the just a little & walk away without asking them out. Brad Pitt looks aside , this is exactly the path I followed to maintaining my virginity into my mid-30's. Glad to hear your experience was more 'fulfilling'. Since I've been separated, the only women who've 'approached' me have been married. That isn't what I'm looking for
kdark Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Maybe some guys don't want a whore but a real woman? Maybe some guys want their girlfriend or wife to initiate sex or initiate a kiss or initiate any kind of intimacy instead of you being the one to initiate all those things every single time and not some whore in Vegas? If you get what I'm saying... It sounds great for women to finally stop being "vaginas" and actually "man up" and initiate sex and intimacy, but they aren't going to do that until guys stop calling the ones that already do do it sluts and whores.
Rorschach Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 It sounds great for women to finally stop being "vaginas" and actually "man up" and initiate sex and intimacy, but they aren't going to do that until guys stop calling the ones that already do do it sluts and whores. So if a woman in a LTR goes up to her boyfriend and initiates sex because she's horny you think men would call that a slut/whore? I'm sorry but thats just foolish. Women can initiate without sleeping around (which is why women get called sluts/whores anyway). Note I've never in my life called a woman a slut/whore because I don't think it's fair that if a guy screws alot of women he gets praised but a girl will get degraded for the same thing, thats complete bullcrap. But I don't think a girl would be called a slut by anybody just because she initiates with her boyfriend.
Author FoxMulder Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 A whore isn't a real woman? Hmm. Learn something new everyday. How do you know the woman you want to initiate discussion with isn't secretly a whore? You can't tell a woman's sexual past just by looking at them, you know. By the way, there aren't any brothels in Vegas, since prostitution is illegal in that city. You failed to see my point, I think most guys would prefer to have their girlfriend/wife initiate sex with them and initiate intimacy instead of a whore.
OpenGL Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 I wouldn't know about that. I sort of disagree. But I won't get into why I disagree. It doesn't matter if women have more sexual partners, they generally don't value sex with multiple partners as much as men do. If they did then they wouldn't insist on having a long-term polygamous relationship with a man. I'm not sure why you disagree but there have been multiple studies on this and every time women have more partners than men. http://www.wellsphere.com/relationships-sex-article/young-women-have-more-sexual-partners-than-men-17-reads/695162 And you're assumption about women, sex, and monogamy is flat out wrong. http://www.lemondrop.com/2008/11/04/more-women-seeking-no-strings-sex/
Author FoxMulder Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 So if a woman in a LTR goes up to her boyfriend and initiates sex because she's horny you think men would call that a slut/whore? I'm sorry but thats just foolish. Women can initiate without sleeping around (which is why women get called sluts/whores anyway). Note I've never in my life called a woman a slut/whore because I don't think it's fair that if a guy screws alot of women he gets praised but a girl will get degraded for the same thing, thats complete bullcrap. But I don't think a girl would be called a slut by anybody just because she initiates with her boyfriend. That's just an excuse made by women to never initiate sex or any form of intimacy with their boyfriend/husband. Most men would love it if their girlfriend or wife initiated sex...
OpenGL Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 (edited) Dude you're going about it the wrong way. I haven't initiated any of my relationships since 3rd grade, it drives them wild being who you are yet appearing unattracted to them. :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh: Oh wait, you're serious :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes: Edited December 13, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
electricity Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 I'm not sure if I believe this, BUT: I've been told that the best kind of women are the kind who can manipulate men to do what she wants... while letting him think he wants and chooses to do it. It seems that it's traditionally believed that men want to feel like they're in charge and have the power to initiate dates, contact, sex, "I love yous," etc. So women are taught to not initiate, but to do everything else under the sun to suggest to him that he should initiate. Flirt with him to get him to ask you out, make your lips look irresistible so he kisses you, turn him on to get him to initiate sex, etc. In practice, I personally prefer something like a 3:1 split of the initiating at the beginning of the relationship, then eventually move towards a more equal split. For instance, at the start of the relationship, if he asks me out, I'll grab his hand. I'll initiate the first hug, but would expect him to initiate the first kiss. As the relationship develops, I'll start arranging dates, initiating kisses, etc. It sounds great for women to finally stop being "vaginas" and actually "man up" and initiate sex and intimacy, but they aren't going to do that until guys stop calling the ones that already do do it sluts and whores. This is a good point. I initiate sex sometimes and my boyfriend will tell me I'm slutty, but only in bed. We both know he respects me and doesn't actually think I'm a slut. Maybe it's because we have that level of mutual trust and respect that I'm willing/not afraid to initiate intimacy with him?
kdark Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 So if a woman in a LTR goes up to her boyfriend and initiates sex because she's horny you think men would call that a slut/whore? I'm sorry but thats just foolish. Women can initiate without sleeping around (which is why women get called sluts/whores anyway). Note I've never in my life called a woman a slut/whore because I don't think it's fair that if a guy screws alot of women he gets praised but a girl will get degraded for the same thing, thats complete bullcrap. But I don't think a girl would be called a slut by anybody just because she initiates with her boyfriend. But why do you think women in LTRs won't initiate sex when they say they like it? It's because they have associated initiating sex with being a slut. Some women can't take off the mask of being innocent and demure when in a relationship. I dated one for six months. It was frustrating. And I know you and I would never hold a girl to that double standard, but a lot of men still do. And I agree, it isn't fair. I had a thread about it a while ago. I'd find it but im on my cell phone.
St. Nick Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 It sounds great for women to finally stop being "vaginas" and actually "man up" and initiate sex and intimacy, but they aren't going to do that until guys stop calling the ones that already do do it sluts and whores. It is my firm belief that women create the double standard regarding promiscuity and sex more than men. I've always encountered women quicker to slander a woman by calling her a whore or a skank quicker than men. I'm not sure why you disagree but there have been multiple studies on this and every time women have more partners than men. http://www.wellsphere.com/relationships-sex-article/young-women-have-more-sexual-partners-than-men-17-reads/695162 And you're assumption about women, sex, and monogamy is flat out wrong. http://www.lemondrop.com/2008/11/04/more-women-seeking-no-strings-sex/ lemondrop dot com? Your sources are weird. Last time it was intelligentwomenreadromance dot com. In any case, more women are going for no strings attached sex then that works better for men. Then women don't have any bargaining power and we don't have to stick around.
phineas Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Brad Pitt looks aside , this is exactly the path I followed to maintaining my virginity into my mid-30's. Glad to hear your experience was more 'fulfilling'. Since I've been separated, the only women who've 'approached' me have been married. That isn't what I'm looking for Honestly, I don't think i'm that good looking, but chasing after women into my late 20's got me laid very little. I got burned so many times by teases & attention whores I just refused to chase after women. If they didn't initiate with me I was just fine being single. I was probably a little bitter, but I do like talking to people so I just talked to them & flirted with them a little. Mostly I just make them laugh their ass off. But, once they initiate "something" & actually follow through to show me their interest was genuine I would then initiate a 2nd date & make sure they knew it was a date.
Rorschach Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 But why do you think women in LTRs won't initiate sex when they say they like it? It's because they have associated initiating sex with being a slut. Some women can't take off the mask of being innocent and demure when in a relationship. I dated one for six months. It was frustrating. And I know you and I would never hold a girl to that double standard, but a lot of men still do. And I agree, it isn't fair. I had a thread about it a while ago. I'd find it but im on my cell phone. I'm not sure if thats the reason, I can understand the mental jump I just remain unconvinced. But I will say that if I dated a women who felt like that it'd probably be a deal breaker for me. I couldn't stand feeling like she just wasn't interested and was only indulging me.
OpenGL Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 It is my firm belief that women create the double standard regarding promiscuity and sex more than men. I've always encountered women quicker to slander a woman by calling her a whore or a skank quicker than men. lemondrop dot com? Your sources are weird. Last time it was intelligentwomenreadromance dot com. In any case, more women are going for no strings attached sex then that works better for men. Then women don't have any bargaining power and we don't have to stick around. I admit I'm being lazy on my sources, I'm just copying and pasting the first thing that comes up. I can spend 5 minutes and look for reputable sources if you want. Women going for no strings sex actually works worse for men because they not only go for 100% looks. They don't need a man who is stable financially, emotionally, or with any kind of intelligence. They just want a hot dude to ****. Why do you think there are so many single mothers these days and welfare is out of control?
OpenGL Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 But, once they initiate "something" & actually follow through to show me their interest was genuine I would then initiate a 2nd date & make sure they knew it was a date. Unless you're an 8/10 or higher you will have 0% of women initiate contact with you. Yes, ZERO. Not even fat women or old women. None. I could go about my business for the rest of my life and if I never initiated contact with women I would never even have a date let alone a relationship for the rest of my life.
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