Entitled Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 My ex emailed me on monday. She wished me a belated birthday and said she was sorry for how things ended. She said she still missed me and loved me but we could never go back because of what happened and that she was with someone else. After only 2 weeks... It's ****ing bull****, she says she loves me, but she cheated on me, left me for him and is already with him. I made a thread saying what I should do, email her or just delete. Well, I really screwed myself over. I emailed her back, then hell ensued. We argued back and forth, I told her exactly how I felt about the whole situation. She then wrote that Emailing me was a waste of time, and that shes going to do what she wants, and she left me with "I did care about your feelings". I snapped, I wrote back "You cared about my feelings? You ****ing cheated on me, did you think of my feelings then? hmm?" I left her with "Do what you want, but don't come crawling back to me." I wasn't thinking I would receive a reply but I did. And it really made me feel like complete garbage. She said "Be happy that I didn't **** him while we were together. BOOYA" She called me an ******* and all sorts of names. She also said that she didn't have to fake it with him and that he knew what he was doing. (Again, trying to bring me down) Then she left me with, if you have anything else to say, talk to my boyfriend. I never saw this side from her, I was shocked. But mostly hurt. I really feel like I was worthless in her eyes, that everything I did for her didn't mean anything, and that she really didn't love me. Now I know that she really isn't worth it, as much as it hurts, I really need to move on now. I feel like the whole 14 months was a big lie, and that It was a complete waste of time. I feel like everything I gave and committed into this relationship was worthless. Damnit... Moral of the story, go complete NC no matter how much you miss them, feel the need to talk to them, just don't contact them. I'm saying this because I don't want anyone else to end up getting hurt again. It really isn't worth it.
LikeABirdWhoFlew Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Hey man, I am really sorry for what you had to go through. I went through someone similar, but not as bad as what you just described. She sounds like a total b!tch and i don't think she is worth your time. You have way to much class for someone like her. Her new boyfriend will end up being cheated on as well most likely. Thanks for the advice about not contacting our EX's. Your right, it's really not worth it. I hope you start to feel a little better soon. I feel for you brother. Take care and remember that she told you all those nasty things only to hurt you not because she meant them. peace, D
Author Entitled Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 Hey man, I am really sorry for what you had to go through. I went through someone similar, but not as bad as what you just described. She sounds like a total b!tch and i don't think she is worth your time. You have way to much class for someone like her. Her new boyfriend will end up being cheated on as well most likely. Thanks for the advice about not contacting our EX's. Your right, it's really not worth it. I hope you start to feel a little better soon. I feel for you brother. Take care and remember that she told you all those nasty things only to hurt you not because she meant them. peace, D Thanks. She really isn't, I dont know why it has taken me so long to figure it out. I was just hoping for something that would never happen. It isn't, it just brings you down more and brings your hopes up for nothing. I hope so too. I have been reading your thread as well, I also hope you feel better man. We shall get through this. Thanks again for the kind words.
Author Entitled Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 Wow...she is unbelievably immature... She really is, I was just blind and stupid I didn't see it.
BetterOffWithoutYou Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 i bet she said all of those things to hurt you, not that they are necessarily true. i also am almost completely sure her new bf had something to do with her reply, since it was so out of character. i bet he told her to say those things. i am very sorry you had to get hurt by this girl i hope you feel better and it is great that you are sharing. no contact is the way to go.
Author Entitled Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 i bet she said all of those things to hurt you, not that they are necessarily true. i also am almost completely sure her new bf had something to do with her reply, since it was so out of character. i bet he told her to say those things. i am very sorry you had to get hurt by this girl i hope you feel better and it is great that you are sharing. no contact is the way to go. I don't know, I feel like she really meant them. Her true colours came out you can say. Thank you, means a lot. It is indeed. I hope you feel better too, and hope the best for you.
BetterOffWithoutYou Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 thank you i remember one time when i was younger my new bf wanted me to call my old flame (the guy i dated before him, it didn't end up in a relationship) and tell him how much better he was than him. i was so infatuated with the new bf i left the old flame a voice mail saying what he wanted me to. i was only 16 at the time so i was very naive, but it can happen. i didn't truly mean the things i said...just wanted to make the new guy happy and hurt the old one for not starting a relationship with me. that was really immature of me looking back, but my story makes me think of what your ex said. if u need any support feel free to message back. best of luck
sedgwick Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Did she seriously say "BOOYA?" If so, she's unbelievably lame.
Author Entitled Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 Did she seriously say "BOOYA?" If so, she's unbelievably lame. She really did, it was like a bragging right for her, but truly, it only made her look like a slut...
Toki Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Reminds me of an ex, two weeks post breakup she calls and says "My new man is much better in bed than you were" to which I replied "congratulations on your new career." she asked what that meant, I told her "I heard you had filled a vacant position as a whore." and then hung up, she called and ranted over my voice mail about how much she hated me for weeks after that, to the point where I just shut off my cell phone and went full NC (this was long before I ever even knew there was a such thing as NC), sometime after that she had a mental breakdown, and killed herself. The point is, that she pretended she didn't have a problem, and instead of working on herself, she tried replacing the empty chasm of emotional dissatisfaction with new a new shiny 'man' and when it turned out they could do nothing to please her, she dropped them, and moved to the next person. And it's funny how insane people are, they keep doing this over and over again until something major breaks the cycle. You are in a way, lucky that this is not the person you are destined to be with, as much as it might hurt now.
SilentWitness Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 (edited) I never saw this side from her, I was shocked. But mostly hurt. I really feel like I was worthless in her eyes, that everything I did for her didn't mean anything, and that she really didn't love me. Now I know that she really isn't worth it, as much as it hurts, I really need to move on now. I feel like the whole 14 months was a big lie, and that It was a complete waste of time. I feel like everything I gave and committed into this relationship was worthless. Damnit... Moral of the story, go complete NC no matter how much you miss them, feel the need to talk to them, just don't contact them. I'm saying this because I don't want anyone else to end up getting hurt again. It really isn't worth it. I've been in a similar situation after a breakup, questioning whether or not the girl ever really cared about me, or if I was really just a toy to her. Not a fun feeling. There really is a fine line between love and hate though, and if she still had feelings for you, then your reply back probably really hurt her, even if she couldn't justify staying with you any longer. Emailing your feelings in the first place was a mistake, girls hate it when you they break your heart and you keep reminding them of it. It breeds contempt in them, they use it against you and call you obsessed and other such things to further justify their actions. You probably want to demonize your ex, I want so bad to be able to do that with mine, but if she acted unsually harsh, then it was probably a defense from hurt, doesn't mean she wants you in her life anymore, but a person's feelings for another can be tenacious. What she did to you was horrible, but it probably wasn't a black and white situation, and it will be more emotionally satisfying to let go of your anger and forgive her, as hard as that is to do. Life is too short to hold onto these kinds of grudges. Edited May 21, 2010 by SilentWitness
GrayClouds Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Moral of the story, go complete NC ... And stay away from chicks that says "BOOYA"
northstar1 Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 She is immature, selfish and cruel. Not someone you want in your life, I hope you can see this now. Some people, as Toki said, never do take stock of themselves, they just jump from person to person to fill that void they need of validation. Hence why most have a string of failed relationships, of which it is never their fault. \
Author Entitled Posted May 21, 2010 Author Posted May 21, 2010 Thanks everyone for the replies. It really makes me feel better. It was a big mistake on my part, but you live and learn I guess. One day I'll get through this, I know I will. SilentWitness, I really liked your post, you're right about not holding grudges. Who knows, maybe one day I'll forgive her, only time will tell. Thanks again everyone, this forum has really helped me.
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