Not the love ace Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 Okay, There's this girl I am friends with who I've been VERY, VERY physically attracted to for about a little over a year now. At the time she had a boyfriend and we would flirt a little bit. The most we ever done was hold hands, and I would caress her, stroke her hair, freak dance, she would sit on my lap and we almost kissed on two-three separate, occasions. Again, she was with her boyfriend so nothing beyond that ever really happened physically between us. I wasn't necessarily in love with her, but physically and sexually there was always something about this girl that I couldn't help but be infatuated with. Every time after I seen her then parted ways, I would just fantasize about all the sexual things I wanted to do with her, I used to play out scenarios in my head about me and her getting down to business. About 3 weeks ago she broke up with her boyfriend because he wasn't giving her the love and attention she always desired. We've been talking about her issues and what she wants for about the past 3 weeks as well and then a few days ago she invited me to a bar to hangout with her. I met up with her and we talked about several different things then the talk about sex came up and eventually we got touchy-feely then left the bar. Once we left the bar, things went from touchy-feely to straight up steamy. We started filling on each other, making out, and things got even more explicit and sexual. We didn't have full on sex but you can say we were damn close to doing it out in public. Eventually, I walked with her home to her place. We listened to music, and then made out again and I stripped her to her panties and we almost nearly have intercourse. However she stopped because she was feeling guilty of a close friend of hers that likes me (but nothing happened between her and I) and another friend of hers whom I slightly hooked up with. On top of that her roommate was on her way to the house anyway and despite being broken up with her ex-boyfriend they live together and he was home in the other room and she didn't want anyone hearing us. I wasn't mad that we didn't go all the way but I was indeed disappointed and left with huge "blue balls" I guess you can say. Ever since that day, I have been so frustrated that the girl I fantasized about so much, the girl whose needs I always wanted to fulfill sexually, the girl that drove me nuts-didn't have sex with me. It sucks because I never thought we would get this close at all and now we came closer than I ever imagined and its like someone busted my bubble. In an odd way, for the past 3 days, I've been feeling so....down. Not depressed, and I don't feel like throwing myself out the window but like I got so far and NEARLY had her where I wanted, I finally found out she was as attracted to me as I was to her, but EVERYTHING just came to a halt. Ugh. I don't know how to do this, I don't want this to hinder me for the next few days. I'm trying to understand her, because she is coming off a break up and isn't mentally stable, and is having issues with her ex and is having trouble enjoying the company of men. It just sucks because two other guys get to have her but I don't get any of the cookie. I know some people will say "oh but she'll be sloppy seconds, thirds" and whatever but DAMMIT I WANT THIS GIRL! Hehe. Its like that movie star that you wish you can have and if you ever actually had it, you'll be star struck. Anyway, I know this is a weird predicament but I seriously can't get that moment out of my mine and I get so self critical of myself. I wonder if I did anything wrong and start blaming myself. I start to worry if she even had any interest or if it was just because she had a little bit of drinks. How should I handle this? Plenty thanks.
whichwayisup Posted May 19, 2010 Posted May 19, 2010 Back off. Cool off. Seems you just want sex from her. Take a break and put her out of your head for a while. She just broke up with someone and isn't ready to have sex with you! To hope or expect that she would just hop in the sack and be that easy is nuts! Respect her! IF you two are going to have sex, make it special. It can't just be about you and your desires. She doesn't want to be a sex thing, I'm sure she would want it to 'mean' something.
Author Not the love ace Posted May 19, 2010 Author Posted May 19, 2010 Back off. Cool off. Seems you just want sex from her. Take a break and put her out of your head for a while. She just broke up with someone and isn't ready to have sex with you! To hope or expect that she would just hop in the sack and be that easy is nuts! Respect her! IF you two are going to have sex, make it special. It can't just be about you and your desires. She doesn't want to be a sex thing, I'm sure she would want it to 'mean' something. I definitely agree about backing off and letting myself cool down. As far as wanting sex from her only, not necessarily. I totally want to have sex with her but I completely understand she's coming off a break up and is hurt. Before anything, I am her friend first and care for how she really feels. As far as the sex between us having "meaning"- I highly doubt it. She's a very sexual girl and is open about enjoying sex and her sexuality and its not a secret that she can have sex without being serious, committed or attached. I doubt she has any feelings for me and whatever but instead she didn't have sex with me for other reasons. Again, I'm not exactly pissed at her, as matter of fact I'm not pissed at her at all, whatsoever. It just drove me crazy that me and the girl whom I desired so sexually didn't get to do the "deed". I didn't want to just "boink" her, I wanted to make love to her. Oh well though, I just need to lay off and chill out, which I have been little-by-little.
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