caribou Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 1. Have not been intimate in months 2. Found BCP in medicine cabinet. When confronted, she claimed it was to regulate heavy periods. 3. Found "feminine wipes" in medicine cabinet. 4. Recently got new phone that allows texting when she previously never had a need to text before. Locked it so I cannot access it.
kevinm1019 Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 Ask her why she has her phone locked and if she gets defensive and/or will not unlock it... yes... she is cheating.
Author caribou Posted May 17, 2010 Author Posted May 17, 2010 She also keeps her computer lock. She will probably just respond it is to keep me from snooping.
ADF Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 Locking her phone or computer doesn't mean anything by itself. I lock mine, too. Too many people these days hae no respect for priacy, so you need to take precautions. Howeer, if you're not being intimate, yet she feels the need to take BCP, she is almost certainly cheating. I don;t buy the heay periods line for a minute.
EricaH329 Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 Howeer, if you're not being intimate, yet she feels the need to take BCP, she is almost certainly cheating. I don;t buy the heay periods line for a minute. This is incorrect. I took birth control pills for years to not only regulate my period, but to also lessen the flow. This was when I was younger and I was not sexually active. Many females do this, actually. Probably more than you think. That is a very valid reason as to why she is taking BCP.
Author caribou Posted May 17, 2010 Author Posted May 17, 2010 This is incorrect. I took birth control pills for years to not only regulate my period, but to also lessen the flow. This was when I was younger and I was not sexually active. Many females do this, actually. Probably more than you think. That is a very valid reason as to why she is taking BCP. Thanks. But what about feminine wipes?
EricaH329 Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 Thanks. But what about feminine wipes? To be honest, i'm not even too sure what a feminine wipe is. I use baby wipes for hygiene, but i'm not sleeping with anyone. That could be her reason as well? Ultimately, I think your concerns should be brought up with her. Ask her why you haven't been intimate lately, and let her know that you would like to be.
Samantha0905 Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 Thanks. But what about feminine wipes? I had to google to see what those are, but figured they were a hygiene product. Perhaps she uses them for just that - to help with odor or maybe post exercise? Some women who workout a lot may be prone to yeast infections and I can see where a feminine wipe would be helpful to prevent those. I also have friends who take birth control pills to control heavy periods. Have you asked her why there is no sex taking place? Now that seems like it could very well be a warning sign. I can't help you with the phone thing -- it sounds fishy, but I'm someone who did not know a cell phone could be locked. Plus, I would get irritated if my significant other wanted to look through my phone or my computer. Privacy is a wonderful thing.
Author caribou Posted May 17, 2010 Author Posted May 17, 2010 I had to google to see what those are, but figured they were a hygiene product. Perhaps she uses them for just that - to help with odor or maybe post exercise? Some women who workout a lot may be prone to yeast infections and I can see where a feminine wipe would be helpful to prevent those. I also have friends who take birth control pills to control heavy periods. Have you asked her why there is no sex taking place? Now that seems like it could very well be a warning sign. I can't help you with the phone thing -- it sounds fishy, but I'm someone who did not know a cell phone could be locked. Plus, I would get irritated if my significant other wanted to look through my phone or my computer. Privacy is a wonderful thing. Thanks. I don't know if she has yeast infection but she does not exercise one bit. There is no sex because she never initiates it and when I initiate it she is usually coldish or is not into it and just goes through the motions, so I eventually took hint and stop initiating intimacy.
Cinnamon2000 Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 1. Have not been intimate in months 2. Found BCP in medicine cabinet. When confronted, she claimed it was to regulate heavy periods. 3. Found "feminine wipes" in medicine cabinet. 4. Recently got new phone that allows texting when she previously never had a need to text before. Locked it so I cannot access it. I am not sure about the other three, but number 4 makes it very likely that she's cheating. Buy a voice activated recorder and place it under the seat of her car or in the house when you're not home and see whom she talk to.
ADF Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 I am not sure about the other three, but number 4 makes it very likely that she's cheating. Buy a voice activated recorder and place it under the seat of her car or in the house when you're not home and see whom she talk to. Oh, c'mon. Why all the 007 stuff? Just confront her about it. If she's easie, he'll know.
U2RockZz Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 oh come on man....there are lot of means you can access her system....get a software called OHP(OPH i don't remember exactly) crack(free).....burn it into CD and run it while switch on her system it will give her all her screen passwords....get a key logger for her email and other PWs....see it's damn easy.....invasion of privacy is S***...we are living 21'st century nothing is safe...ask her to get over it...moreover you have every right to invade her privacy i guess
on1wheel Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 I am sorry to say but speaking from experience I am certain she is cheating. • The locked phone is used to text him, as they don't show up on the bill • The locked PC is in case she didn't delete the internet history etc. • The reason ur not getting into her panties lately is that she doesn't want U to see the new bra/panty sets; not to mention that she has been either shaving or trimming for him • The wipes; well we all know what they are used to clean up...sorry. Not trying to be cruel, but they all happened to me. Take it from us here that have been down this road; she is cheating. So the question is "what are you gonna do now?" Because there are PI's in every city, software &/or IT wiz's with no problems finding out what you need to prove it but what will you do when U know for certain? You need to have a plan, because U won't be able to eat, sleep or think when you find out...trust me. Do you guys have kids? God I hope not. Good luck.
Author caribou Posted May 17, 2010 Author Posted May 17, 2010 If I ask her about it, she will just deny and probably start a huge dramatic argument. Not what I need. I prefer to figure out if there is a way to find the "smoking gun" evidence and then confront her...
Spark1111 Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 Very smart, caribou and you have been given some good advice here. Trust your gut. Patiently gather your evidence before confronting. Those in an affair will lie, dodge and weave beautifully to preserve the affair feelings. It is called gaslighting. Once you have gathered your evidence, then confront. It's okay to have an expectation of privacy, but NOT SECRECY in a marriage. Locked phones and computers, new BCP, and the new use of feminine wipes plus the lack of intimacy are all possible signs she has met a new man. Verify your gut instincts and then confront once you have gained irrefutable proof.
jnj express Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 If the 2 of you have intimacy issues---then you have major problems anyway----you need to communicate about that RIGHT NOW if nothing else. If you can't talk to each other and work out your problems---your relationship will eventually go bad, for all kinds of reasons. Sit her down and talk about the intimacy problem----you never know where it will lead, and what info. will come from it. BUT THE 2 OF YOU HAD BETTER START TALKING TO EACH OTHER!!!!!!!
Mimolicious Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 Thanks. But what about feminine wipes? What a girl can have good hygiene nowdays????? The BCP is actually true, just like Erica said. The rest... if is taste and smells like fish, then it is FISH!
2sure Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 If my partner were the type to become suspicious over my use of feminine products...I might be inclined to lock him out of my communications. Have you always or at least recently been suspicious or questioning? How long have you lived together?
carhill Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 OP, unless you're married with children, who cares? Just leave. Think about how little of her time and energy she's spending on you. Even less than it took for you to type out this thread. Doesn't that piss you off? Get moving, today
Darth Vader Posted May 17, 2010 Posted May 17, 2010 (edited) Very smart, caribou and you have been given some good advice here. Trust your gut. Patiently gather your evidence before confronting. Those in an affair will lie, dodge and weave beautifully to preserve the affair feelings. It is called gaslighting. Once you have gathered your evidence, then confront. It's okay to have an expectation of privacy, but NOT SECRECY in a marriage. Locked phones and computers, new BCP, and the new use of feminine wipes plus the lack of intimacy are all possible signs she has met a new man. Verify your gut instincts and then confront once you have gained irrefutable proof. What you can do is get that Checkmate swab thingy. You basically swab her used panties, or send them in and they do a sperm sample on them. Well, if you're not getting any, someone surely is! Don't have sex with her until you know for sure! BTW, you probably could check her used panties for any visual evidence right now!(I know, nasty:sick:) Anyway, bear with me. You've had sex with her before, you would know what that stuff looks like dried, heck, I say give it a go! No sex, no sperm, sperm = SEX! But no sex for you, so it can't be yours, get it?! Edited May 17, 2010 by Darth Vader
Author caribou Posted May 18, 2010 Author Posted May 18, 2010 What a girl can have good hygiene nowdays????? The BCP is actually true, just like Erica said. The rest... if is taste and smells like fish, then it is FISH! What is the point of feminine wipes?
EricaH329 Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 What is the point of feminine wipes? Try googling feminine wipes. They are used for hygiene purposes.
aerogurl87 Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 Well the last thing stood out for me. If she's not texting you, and is all secretive about it and just got it added to her plan, odds are she's cheating. Texting is secretive by nature. You turn your phone on vibrate, and voila! Your able to have long conversations without anyone knowing who your talking to or what your talking about. I should know, I used it for 2 months to hide one of my ex boyfriends from my parents.
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