I really, really hate facebook.

[bananaboat11]

The good news. I'm seeing a new girl who I really, really like. She seems to be just that into me. And since she's just getting out of a year 'dating thing'... we're taking it SLOW so I don't end up being her rebound. Yes, I brought it up and she acknowledged it. heh

 

Anyhow... I HATE facebook.

 

The bad news...

 

My ex... from over 7 months ago. burned me bad. It sucked. I was miserable for MONTHS. I immersed myself in positive influences and I'm stronger than ever.

 

Unfortunately... we do have a couple of mutual friends.

 

So I do notice these stupid block-unblock games.

 

I'm totally fine with her blocking me. I want nothing to do with her. Makes **** easier.

 

I am irritated at her unblocking me time and time again. It lets me know she's still thinking about me to SOME stupid ****ing degree.

 

ARGH.

 

I'm trying to move on. She burned me.

 

I know I shouldn't care. At all.

 

But it's hard not to notice. No, I don't look at her facebook profile. I don't want to. It'll set me back so many months. I have a healthy relationship going right now. And THIS... this thing with an ex from over 7 months ago that I NEVER want back in my life is playing these stupid facebook games.

 

Block her you say?

 

I've done that before. And for some ****ed up reason, I unblock her. It's stupid. It's immature.

 

But yeah... I won't block her. I won't let her know I'm acknowledging her existence.

 

A part of me fears I'll hear from her this summer... it'll commemorate one year since her using me.

 

I'm really enjoying my time with this new girl. I need to remove my ex entirely from my life... but it's hard... b/c I did share a piece of me with that bitch of a girl who used / burned me... ugh

[skydiveaddict]

I agree completely fb is poison. It does more harm than good. And it's a source of all kinds of misery when breakups happen. It can be used as a weapon to hurt others. I hate it.

[McGrupp]

i also despise the fbook. met my ex through it. she blocked me b4 we broke up. led to me freaking out and the breakup...

 

ugh so immature. signed off for 3 months. signed back in and she unblocked me, so i re-blocked her.

 

just games man. so lame...

 

anyway glad to see your seeing someone new. me too.

 

still think of the ex though.

[jlr]

Stop playing games with the unblock, block.

Remove her from your friends list completely.

Speaking from experience, trust me, it's for the best.

[somedude81]

You can hide certain people so their posts don't show up on your front page.

[Div]

You can hide certain people so their posts don't show up on your front page.

You can do that, but I'm finding the temptation to check the ex's profile far too great. I really think I should remove mine.

[Heatemyheart89]

facebook=evil remove all links/ ties with the ex. My ex blocked me and I'm pretty glad.

[giovanniazael]

The good news. I'm seeing a new girl who I really, really like. She seems to be just that into me. And since she's just getting out of a year 'dating thing'... we're taking it SLOW so I don't end up being her rebound. Yes, I brought it up and she acknowledged it. heh

 

Anyhow... I HATE facebook.

 

The bad news...

 

My ex... from over 7 months ago. burned me bad. It sucked. I was miserable for MONTHS. I immersed myself in positive influences and I'm stronger than ever.

 

Unfortunately... we do have a couple of mutual friends.

 

So I do notice these stupid block-unblock games.

 

I'm totally fine with her blocking me. I want nothing to do with her. Makes **** easier.

 

I am irritated at her unblocking me time and time again. It lets me know she's still thinking about me to SOME stupid ****ing degree.

 

ARGH.

 

I'm trying to move on. She burned me.

 

I know I shouldn't care. At all.

 

But it's hard not to notice. No, I don't look at her facebook profile. I don't want to. It'll set me back so many months. I have a healthy relationship going right now. And THIS... this thing with an ex from over 7 months ago that I NEVER want back in my life is playing these stupid facebook games.

 

Block her you say?

 

I've done that before. And for some ****ed up reason, I unblock her. It's stupid. It's immature.

 

But yeah... I won't block her. I won't let her know I'm acknowledging her existence.

 

A part of me fears I'll hear from her this summer... it'll commemorate one year since her using me.

 

I'm really enjoying my time with this new girl. I need to remove my ex entirely from my life... but it's hard... b/c I did share a piece of me with that bitch of a girl who used / burned me... ugh

Times like this, when you know that you are completely done with someone, there is nothing say or do with this person sow whatever they do, keep living and don't allow them back in your life. You're right, no need to block her for it'll only be showing her that she is being acknowledged. You feel that she may call soon which is a a feeling that may come true so brace yourself. You have no reason to answer her phone calls and if she really has something that's important enough to tell you she'll either leave you a message or send you a text. Enjoy your present for your past was where you pain was born. Give the girl deserving your time and no one else. Best of luck to you.

[adamt]

it's not about the ex anymore, it about what is best for you. blocking them and unfriending them on facebook is best for you. you have to put yourself first now. take care of yourself

[DustySaltus]

I had so many mutual friends with my ex that I just deleted the whole thing. Sure, people were pissed at me but at the end of the day the quickest way towards getting myself back was to focus on me instead of her and my 400 other "friends".

[northstar1]

Good points Dusty.

 

What are you really losing if you give up Facebook? People who are your true friends will still contact you if they need you.

 

Facebook caused me a lot of grief with a past breakup and still seeing what they were up to.

[bananaboat11]

Thanks for the advice and feedback thus far.

 

It doesn't really burn me anymore as it does irritate me knowing she's thinking of me... I get that notion by her constant blocking/unblocking me.

 

Know that she blocked me the day we broke up via facebook (ie she dumped me via facebook)... when you block someone... you automatically defriend them. So her and I... not facebook friends.

 

Something tells me things didn't work out with her recent beau. Didn't hear this from mutuals. Didn't see it on facebook. She didn't tell me. After being with her for the short amount of time we were.. she talked... a lot. She thought she was communicating, but she would only run her mouth. She ended up with a shorter, fatter guy with a dead end job.... not that it was a bad job, but he was just a liquor store clerk. Although he was hippie-ish, like her... he isn't what she's dated in the past. Guys like me... (not to be conceited)... but we were all tall, fit, good looking, financially stable, career oriented or in graduate school programs...

 

I think when she dumped me for her ex... the bazillionaire ... he burned her so she was rebounding with this new guy from me + her ex (or maybe just her ex... who knows)... but when she was down, depressed, sad, etc... who was there for her (without knowing it)? Me....

 

hopefully she doesn't try to get in touch with me. The more I think about it.. the more I believe she won't. Which is a good thing.

[fedupfeelinglikethis]

god i really wish i could feel like you do, my ex blocked me then un blocked me. but i was happy she unblocked me because it made me think she was thinking of me, then for the next couple of weeks i was waiting for a friend request off her which never came. im not going to add her i know that for sure, but i just miss this girl so much no matter what i do i just cant seem to get her out of my head. and yeah facebook sucks! when i seen she was in a new relationship with some guy a couple a couple of months after we broke up it nearly killed me, wish i had just blocked her then but i couldnt bring my self to do it.

[Feelin Frisky]

I agree completely fb is poison. It does more harm than good. And it's a source of all kinds of misery when breakups happen. It can be used as a weapon to hurt others. I hate it.

 

Ditto. Every slightly computer literate person in my family has bought into FB and so many of them have managed to blab something or comment in a way that alienates them from each other. It's nothing but a system designed by social illiterates to generate revenue and where the chips fall in other people's lives, so be it. It has no superior social development design premise and is just another Internet default. This is one of the reason's I'm against "net neutrality"--as long as advertising is the wind that makes the sail go, most of this seemingly "free" stuff will just sit a a pacifier to a stagnant culture-or one learning new ways to get worse.

[GrayClouds]

I hate liver and onions for that reason I stay away from it.

 

 

 

For the soon to be enlightened:

 

http://www.quitfacebookday.com/

 

 

 

 

.

[dan_the_man]

I have my ex deleted, not blocked.

 

Since we don't share common friends, I never see her updates or comments. I could easily check her page, but I don't want too.

[karlo]

i also hate facebook...

[DontWorryBHappy]

I know how you feel. My ex blocked me also after using me. (invited me to his room to sleep with him after I had poured my heart out to him one day, telling him how much I loved him.... then blocked me from facebook the next day). Anyway, a month later he unblocked me. And just like you it really ticked me off... because when your ex unblocks you it causes you to think about them whether you like it or not since suddenly there's their picture again and they exist again (to a small degree) in your world. It was especially annoying to realize that since we have ONE mutual friend, I was able to see many of his other pictures (thank god no recent ones). Well, I commented on a post of that ONE mutual friend we have together and found myself reblocked the next day. It's hard not to analyze what it means. I mean, when he unblocked me I thought maybe it meant he feels nothing about me anymore (as in, not even dislike or guilt or any emotion) and wanted me to just be another face floating around on facebook, not even tied to his block list. Then I analyzed what it meant when he blocked me again... I guess it must mean that he *is* affected by my existence, because blocking then reblocking is definitely an emotional thing. I know that if he didn't care one way or the other then he wouldn't have bothered to reblock. But THIS is where it is annoying... It's annoying that him blocking and unblocking then reblocking has caused me to think about him and try to figure out what the heck HE is thinking. And THAT is not healthy..... It's not healthy to even be slightly concerned about what our ex is thinking. After all, they're the ones who played with our hearts. I, like you, actually much prefer to be on his block list rather than me having to be responsible for blocking him, because I too don't have the strength or heart to keep him blocked. Because I, like you, gave a piece of myself to him and yes.... deep down there are buried feelings there. But both of us are doing well by moving on with our lives and pursuing others. Personally I'm happy to be back on his block list... It means he doesn't exist in my world again. But I still get to exist in his... on his awesome "block list". Woohoo

[hardtocope]

Oh God, facebook sucks. It's been helping me connect to friends I haven't talked to in a while, but I see my fresh ex every day, and the guy she took up with, and their little comments back and forth, and her 'coded' comments about bad interactions with me ( we work together ). It is so painful - I don't want to give up facebook because of it's usefulness to my friends, and I don't want to play block/defriend games with her and others, and can't stand not to know what she is doing even though it is killing me. It's a tool that let's one give in to the self-destructive impulse in relationships, I think.

[mickleb]

I know how you feel. My ex blocked me also after using me. (invited me to his room to sleep with him after I had poured my heart out to him one day, telling him how much I loved him.... then blocked me from facebook the next day). Anyway, a month later he unblocked me. And just like you it really ticked me off... because when your ex unblocks you it causes you to think about them whether you like it or not since suddenly there's their picture again and they exist again (to a small degree) in your world. It was especially annoying to realize that since we have ONE mutual friend, I was able to see many of his other pictures (thank god no recent ones). Well, I commented on a post of that ONE mutual friend we have together and found myself reblocked the next day. It's hard not to analyze what it means. I mean, when he unblocked me I thought maybe it meant he feels nothing about me anymore (as in, not even dislike or guilt or any emotion) and wanted me to just be another face floating around on facebook, not even tied to his block list. Then I analyzed what it meant when he blocked me again... I guess it must mean that he *is* affected by my existence, because blocking then reblocking is definitely an emotional thing. I know that if he didn't care one way or the other then he wouldn't have bothered to reblock. But THIS is where it is annoying... It's annoying that him blocking and unblocking then reblocking has caused me to think about him and try to figure out what the heck HE is thinking. And THAT is not healthy..... It's not healthy to even be slightly concerned about what our ex is thinking. After all, they're the ones who played with our hearts. I, like you, actually much prefer to be on his block list rather than me having to be responsible for blocking him, because I too don't have the strength or heart to keep him blocked. Because I, like you, gave a piece of myself to him and yes.... deep down there are buried feelings there. But both of us are doing well by moving on with our lives and pursuing others. Personally I'm happy to be back on his block list... It means he doesn't exist in my world again. But I still get to exist in his... on his awesome "block list". Woohoo

 

So not much moving on happened in the last month, then, DWBH?

 

Your obesessing over this guy has now definitely outlasted the two-month LDR itself. I fear you are falling square into the category of 'full-time miserablist'.

 

Hence - you now have the choice:

 

Choose to keep thinking obesessively about his every move, like this ^^

 

OR

 

Stop. And think about something else, instead.

 

Whenever you begin to think about him, stop. Tell yourself it's not healthy. You REALLY don't want to. You're NOT going to and choose to think about something that makes you feel happier, instead. All your good points, all the stuff that will help restore your very damaged sense of self-esteem.

 

Who gives a toss if he's blocked and unblocked you? It was a TWO month LDR! You only met him a few times! If you must: block him then don't look at your block list until you're well and truly over him. There's no reason for you to look at it in-between, is there??

 

Just make life easier for yourself. Stop choosing to be all angst-ridden.

 

And tell us about the GOOD things you've been getting up to since you were last here.

 

I'm all ears.

 

x

[northstar1]

Oh God, facebook sucks. It's been helping me connect to friends I haven't talked to in a while, but I see my fresh ex every day, and the guy she took up with, and their little comments back and forth, and her 'coded' comments about bad interactions with me ( we work together ). It is so painful - I don't want to give up facebook because of it's usefulness to my friends, and I don't want to play block/defriend games with her and others, and can't stand not to know what she is doing even though it is killing me. It's a tool that let's one give in to the self-destructive impulse in relationships, I think.

 

 

So you'd rather torture yourself by spying on your ex and her new bf's affair? Come on man, stop doing that to yourself! It's not about playing games, it's about looking out for YOU and your happiness. If your ex really cares that you block her, why do YOU care? She's moved onto someone else, she clearly isn't looking out for you.

 

Delete her, and I promise you'll move on faster.

[Cantcope]

I blocked at 9pm on Tuesday and at 10pm I got a scathing email from him bitching me out for EVERYTHING! Does someone get a notice or something when you block them, or was he just trying to check me out? I unfriended him over a month ago, so it's not as though he was able to see my stuff anyway.....

 

It was hard, but DO IT! And for the love of G-D....DON'T block and unblock! Why let them know that the thought of them even crosses your mind anymore.

 

Think back to the beginning of your relationship. You were somewhat of a mystery to them. Now, since they don't want us, it's more important than ever to remain a mystery.

 

Sure, people have let me sneak a peek at his page. And every time, I walked away crying. Why do that to myself. I just don't want to know anymore. Whay I don't know can't hurt me!

[Cantcope]

Also want to add that it's actually been freeing since I blocked him.

 

I used to spend my night laying in bed, looking at the profiles of our 41 "common friends", just to see what he was posting so that I would know what he was up to. It was pathetic. Now that I know I won't see a darn thing from him, I don't have mini anxiety attacks looking around.

 

Sad thing....I know that he was doing the same thing. In one of our text fights last week, he brought up something I posted on someones page that he is BARELY friends with, so I know that he was looking for my posts as well.

 

I'll never understand that if someone doesn't want you anymore, why do they want to keep "tabs" on your life. It's BS...that's why. He misses the crap out of me, he wants to be with me. It's just too difficult for him to put in any effort to make it work.

 

Pathetic!

[GrayClouds]

I know how you feel. My ex blocked me also after using me. (invited me to his room to sleep with him after I had poured my heart out to him one day, telling him how much I loved him....

 

While I do not agree with his behavior, I hope you learn a valuable lesson, if you do not want to feel used do not sleep with a guy until he is pouring out his heart to you. Just because you tell someone your feelings, and they listen to it, it is important to understand that they are not mutual confirming those feelings.

 

While action speaks louder then words over the long run, real intimacy comes from quality communications, building that quality should be the first step in a relationship, not the second, third or forth.

 

Insisting on it being the first, shows the world how much you value yourself as well as how much you value love. And you much more likely to find yourself with some who agrees with you.

[ans562]

I have blocked here from showing up on the stupid news feed, but I still get tempted and look at her page. I want to delete her completely, but I don't want her to look for me someday and see that I removed her and have her know that it was still bothering me over a year later. Pathetic and too prideful? Yeah, but i can't help it.