norajane Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 I assure you i would never "Get off" on almost getting caught and it is my sincerest hope that we never get caught as I am sure it is his also. I would never want to cause someone else pain Or break up his family and he would never want to cause me any trouble either. We have discussed this in lenth. Really? Because you're both well on your way to doing exactly that. Don't head off into an affair without being honest with yourself about what you're doing, at the very least. Open your eyes and see what you're doing. Don't go on with the "it just happened" excuse later. You're making active choices every step of the way to get into this affair, which, yes, will hurt his wife, and will hurt you and cause you trouble. Own it. Take responsibility for your actions and your choices.
jthorne Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 I assure you i would never "Get off" on almost getting caught and it is my sincerest hope that we never get caught as I am sure it is his also. I would never want to cause someone else pain Or break up his family and he would never want to cause me any trouble either. We have discussed this in lenth.Respectfully, I highly doubt that since you see nothing wrong with entering this woman's home and invading her privacy. Makes no difference whether you were invited by this man or not. Entering another woman's home when you have designs on her husband is extremely distasteful. I had a friend whose H cheated on her. The thing she couldn't get over more than anything else was the fact that her brought the- I won't say what she called her- into her home. Don't head off into an affair without being honest with yourself about what you're doing, at the very least. Open your eyes and see what you're doing. Don't go on with the "it just happened" excuse later. You're making active choices every step of the way to get into this affair, which, yes, will hurt his wife, and will hurt you and cause you trouble. Own it. Take responsibility for your actions and your choices.One of the best posts I've seen on LS.
bentnotbroken Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 Really? Because you're both well on your way to doing exactly that. Don't head off into an affair without being honest with yourself about what you're doing, at the very least. Open your eyes and see what you're doing. Don't go on with the "it just happened" excuse later. You're making active choices every step of the way to get into this affair, which, yes, will hurt his wife, and will hurt you and cause you trouble. Own it. Take responsibility for your actions and your choices. Exactly. I think they both want to be busted because neither is adult enough to do the right thing. Own your choices and your conscious decisions to slowly destroying the trust and life of someone who by your own admission, treats you with respect and dignity. She appears to be a class act.
Fieldsofgold Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 I assure you i would never "Get off" on almost getting caught and it is my sincerest hope that we never get caught as I am sure it is his also. I would never want to cause someone else pain Or break up his family and he would never want to cause me any trouble either. We have discussed this in lenth. When I was a young woman, I had a unique experience. I worked with another woman who suspected her husband was having an affair. For several months, I listened as she talked about it, how she loved him, how she did things to show her love for him, the fears and concerns for their child. I felt sooo bad for her. What a jerk she was married to! If I could have gotten my hands on him, I would have told him a thing or two. Then I discovered that the man I was dating was that man. He would drop her off from lunch on one side of the building and pick me up on the other side. If you even remotely think you are not hurting his wife and child, either because she doesn't *know,* or because you haven't had sex, stop kidding yourself. I know this is "corny," but whatever happened to "treat other people the way you want to be treated?" You definitely wouldn't want some woman doing the things you are doing, with someone you love. Have enough self-respect to stop it. The "feelings" you get from it aren't worth the mess it causes. You can have those same "feelings" with someone who is single, without destroying other peoples lives and your own self-esteem.
GreenEyedLady Posted May 18, 2010 Posted May 18, 2010 Apparently, both AP's and BS's freely post in BOTH infidelity and here. In this case where the original poster posted a thread where she is baffeled by the wife's behavior, why the objection to BS giving insight here? I don't think it's even a post where there should be a label given. I thought your advice was given as common sense. In fact, I find the underlying tone of the original post to be one of superiority. What's superior about being sneaky and untrustworthy? GEL
Fieldsofgold Posted May 19, 2010 Posted May 19, 2010 Really? Because you're both well on your way to doing exactly that. Don't head off into an affair without being honest with yourself about what you're doing, at the very least. Open your eyes and see what you're doing. Don't go on with the "it just happened" excuse later. You're making active choices every step of the way to get into this affair, which, yes, will hurt his wife, and will hurt you and cause you trouble. Own it. Take responsibility for your actions and your choices. Active choices every step of the way. Exactly.
torranceshipman Posted May 19, 2010 Posted May 19, 2010 Acually he has told me of her being very suspicous of him and jealous. Said there are times she dont want to leave him alone and that she never complians of the long hours at work because she knows exactly where he is which is the way she likes it. I wonder if she has her suspicions on some other women. Apparently not me. Or maybe he is telling little porkies and she isn't a crazy, jealous, controlling harridan but actually quite a laid back gal who doesn't bat an eyelid when her H brings home a female work colleague. You've just seen that so I'd caution believing any of his stories. And don't forget that he is trying to get in your pants, so is probably just saying whatever gets him a little naughty time with you
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