i thought everything was perfect... but then i was taken by surprise..

[Scrubman]

right ill start off by saying that im 19 and my recently made ex is 21. we have been in a LDR for 4 years but saw each other almost every weekend, sometimes had to be every other weekend for various reasons.

 

now everything was going fine, im in my last year of college and i was guna move up her way when i finished ( we had been looking for flats). i had even thought about looking for an engagment ring but thought maybe not yet as we don't live together, although weve spoken about it and she had always said that she would say yes. weve spoken about children and names of them. so yeah everything has been going brilliantly.

 

now the bad part....

well about a year ago she lost a fair amount of close friends due to her being stabbed in the back but i wont go into that and she had started making friends again with different people around 1 - 2 months ago and in the last month things have been ever so slightly different as in she was less cuddly and she stopped putting i love you on texts... just little things that u dnt notice until they arent there.

 

now aswell as this for her she has also been told she has to redo a whole year at her college cos she didnt do enough.... despite the fact she worked damn hard.

 

she told me last weekend that she still loves me but she needs time to decide wether or not its as a friend or as a partner. she said she doesnt know because im all she has ever experienced. i was instantly heart broken.... ive asked her a few times why and what does she need to do to decide and she just says that she doesnt know. she has said though that she would never want to lose me from her life completly.

 

i really do not know what to do...

 

is she feeling like this because she has new friends and just waant to be as "excited and free" as they are?

does she just not love me anymore?

is it the stress of having to do all the work again before august on her course thats getting to her and she doesnt want any distractions?

 

any help would be greatly appreciated... thank you for reading, even though it was so long if you still have any questions ask away...

[beatingheartbaby]

dude. im going through the exact same thing. 5 years LDR. she has a month left until she moves back to our hometown. a week before break up, we're talking about moving in together. i go to her mom to ask for advice on engagement ring...the next week, i get the "we have to talk" call.

 

breaks up with me, she loves me so much, but is confused, and needs time and space. she doesnt feel the fire...needs to focus on friends and graduation.

 

...personally, i am still confused as to what went down...

 

...but after doing research on this thing, and talking to plenty of people...it makes most sense that she has met someone else...or wants to meet someone else. she started hanging around with nothing but single friends, and i think the grass looked greener on the other side.

 

it isnt.

 

im sorry man, i dont have much advice, but i just wanted to reach out and let you know you arent alone. ive been NC for two weeks with her. she broke up with me 3 and a half weeks ago. she seems to be moving on just fine. women can be real cold man.