milkmaterial Posted May 13, 2010 Posted May 13, 2010 back in 2007 i met this really nice guy, lets call him travis. handsome and smart .. he cooked great and could actually dance. we didnt do the deed or anything but he did mention he wanted to have a 3 some w/ me if ever (one day)..it was kind of like a horrid turn off for me but i acted all cool and maintained a calm face ..needless to say it didnt really work out. then i also met another guy named Van who like..casually joked and mentioned (whilst in a romantic conversation) that we have, someday, have an "eiffel tower". at first i didnt know what it is, but then i googled it and i felt really discouraged. i dont have to be in a relationship and i am not desperate. in fact, its these things that really discourage me from being i a relationship. i believe if i do voice out an opinion that i dont like it, they wont change. they still be the same.. have the same desires and fantasies. so there is no point. and yes, needless to say van and i didnt work out. </3
Rorschach Posted May 13, 2010 Posted May 13, 2010 Don't worry there are a small group of us who don't want anything to do with 3somes, I wouldn't be surprised if it was a larger group than I think it is either. There are good guys out there unfortunately we're just hiding
phineas Posted May 13, 2010 Posted May 13, 2010 I wouldn't turn down 2 chicks if they offered. But, I sure wouldn't want to seek one with someone i'm in a relationship with. That's just disrespectful to the woman.
sagetalk Posted May 13, 2010 Posted May 13, 2010 It sounds like you are getting wrapped up in these guys ability to entertain you and their charm. Start picking guys based on who they are as a person and you'll do much better. Guys who are very sexually active tend to be: great conversationalists, great dancers, fun, outgoing, spontaneous, but they also tend to be arrogant jerks who would ask you to do something like a threesome. Fun is great, charm is great, but there are much better things to place number 1 on your "must have" list in a guy. If you stick with those last two as high priorities, then enjoy dating every jerk in the world.
OpenGL Posted May 13, 2010 Posted May 13, 2010 It sounds like you are getting wrapped up in these guys ability to entertain you and their charm. Start picking guys based on who they are as a person and you'll do much better. Haha, yeah right
Ihavenoidea Posted May 14, 2010 Posted May 14, 2010 probably just a fantasy. I joked around with my last GF about that stuff but there's no way I would want to actually have one, I would feel like I was cheating on her
Engadget Posted May 14, 2010 Posted May 14, 2010 I have no interest in 3somes at all. This doesn't mean if two women walked into my bedroom nude I'd turn them down, but I'd never look for it or try to find it.
carhill Posted May 14, 2010 Posted May 14, 2010 OP, since I'm not into NSA sex, no threesomes here, but I can offer some advice regarding your frustrations. IMO, a healthy perspective is to accept these potentials who approach you in this particular way as incompatible and not indicative of the potential population as a whole. They are individuals. As men, we experience a similar dynamic when approaching women we 'like', as we have no clue as to whether the woman is compatible or not, prior to engaging her. No harm, no foul. So, with your boundaries clearly in mind, continue to assess potentials as you see fit and accept the rejections as part of the process of interpersonal relationship dynamics.
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