Girlfriend Troubles.

[Wudd]

So my girlfriend(17) and I(18), just recently broke up yesterday. We have been together over 2 and a half years. In the beginning our relationship was great. But after the one year mark, we did fight alotttt. about anything and everything. we went through fazes of fighting and on and off breaking up. but things got better. and here we are more then 2 and a half years later. things have been going a lot better then before. but yesterday my girlfriend broke up with me. i honestly didnt see it coming. well tonight we talked. she told me the main reasons. number one is that she is going to collage. its about 60 miles away. the second reason, is because i currently do not have a job. i admit sense i graduated i took a very lazy and procrastinated route. i have worked odd jobs. but I've never had, i guess what most would be considered a real job. ive mowed lawns, helped on farms, and things of that nature. just to get by in high school. i do find it hard to be motivated, i use to see a counselor because i had personal issues. anyway, my girlfriends main concern was that i would just keep her back from succeeding. with are talk tonight i told her that i love her and i understand her point of view and im not upset. we got along well on the phone. and she even told me she loves me. which took me by surprise, sense we are broken up. i really love her. im not the type of guy who goes out looking for relationships. ive only dated one other girl before her. so i really do feel that i love her. i realized this half way through the relationship because nothing not even fighting keep us apart. i also think she feels the same about me.

 

i dont want to lose her, i really do care a lot about her. i feel like this is my wake up call, that i cant sit around and expect everything to work out for me as i thought i could. the thing is i dont know what to do. shes leaving in a month... and i want to show her that i can get a job and that im not going to put things off, and that we could make this relationship work even if she is 60 miles away. weve been together for so long. i would hate to see it end because of my lazy actions. overall im confused and need a little guidance. i have a job lined up but i cant start working till the end of the month. and im afraid that will be to late and she will be gone.

[lvixen]

You're 18 and she's already concerned about you not having a job? I hope you just got out of high school (I mean graduated instead of dropping out). I don't even want to know what her thoughts on employment will be when she is 30 or even 40. Sounds like an EXCUSE to get rid of you to me.

[giovanniazael]

I know how it is to love someone to just have them leave you for whatever reason it may be. But yes, it should be a wake up call for you as a young man. Had I known then what I know now, I would've definitely done things a lot different. Being a man in this world requires that you work in order to make something out of yourself. A girl that leaves you for that reason obviously looks for a future in a guy and a guy that shows no signs of it, gets eliminated. My advice to you is to would be to not only look for a job, but also write out a plan for yourself. Make goals for yourself and work hard to achieve them. Although you are young, love has never had an age limit so be a man to her. A man takes care of his own and a man is independent. Anything less than that shows to any young lady that she is still dealing with a boy. High School is over and whether you like it or not, you are now an adult in this real world and trust me, it isn't easy but you can do it! Although you are waiting on this job, look to continuing your education if possible. Remember, you have to be happy with yourself in order for you to even offer yourself to someone else. If you need any advice just let me know. I'll be glad to give you some tips on what you can do. Best of luck to you man. There is still hope for you so don't give up just yet.