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divorced my ex-wife, now want her back


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Posted

My ex-wife and I were married for 7 years and together for just over 9 years total. We recently were divorced in April of this year. She was the love of my life. We have a beautiful 3 year old daughter together. The problem is I had an affair when our daughter was about a year old. My ex is 32, I am 34. My ex-wife found out, and well, the rest is history. We seperated for about a year...We went to counseling (but our counselors were awful). We lived apart, and I started having the affair again. My wife, in all fairness, was done. The divorce was finalized in April of this year (beginning of april). Since the divorce proceedings started in July, I have thought about my life and what I did. I am truly regretful and miss my wife. I wish I had a magic wand and could do away with the affair and be with my wife again. Her family knows about the affair so that makes it harder I'm sure to get back together. She was my best friend and I ruined it. We had some other problems in our marriage that I wish we worked harder on...and clearly the affair was the worst decision I could have made. I never cheated on anyone in my life until this affair. I want my wife back. I love her with all my heart and regret what I did. I want my best friend back. Is there anything I can do to win her back? I tried reconciling during the divorce but she did not want to. Please I need some good advice on how to handle this and what my next step should be...I think she may be dating someone but am not sure. I was thinking about taking her out (if she would even go- which she may not) to talk...maybe to a place we went on our first date.

Posted

Questions:

 

How did you decide to cheat on your wife? (What were the reasons?)

 

and

 

Can you guarantee that, if she took you back, you would never cheat on her again?

Posted

Your post doesn't give many details on how she feels, but from what little you did say, it sounds like she is done. If she is done, there is absolutely NOTHING that you can do about it. I suppose a true test to find out if she is really done with you is to go ahead and ask her out on a date and do make sure you tell her it's a date, don't use any other excuse as that would piss her off, most likely. If she refuses......you are just going to have to move on with your life and accept that it's over and make yourself a good life.......learn from your mistakes and don't rinse and repeat. Good luck!

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