tattoomytoe Posted January 23, 2004 Posted January 23, 2004 my mother had this done in late nov. she has lost about 30lbs, and she looks soo much better. she is 5'8 and weighed around 300, maybe a little less. i mean the weight was/ is very unhealthy for her, sleep apnia, high blood presure, undue stress on her body and legs, she is a RN so is on her feet at least 12 hrs. well my father is such a butt hole now that she has had it done, he doesn't seem to really support her, he told me she was taking the easy way out by not exercising etc... but it is definately NOT easy. i totally support her..in fact i would like to have something similar done, maybe just to decrease the size of my stomach... it is a muscle and does stretch back out, but mine is just way outta wack, but i do not fit the criteria. i was wondering what are some of ya'lls thoughts on this? oh and i will rant on my pops too. all they do now is yell and are bitchy to one another...divorce was brought up, but just in the sacastic-like question of So do you want a divorce then? which it has been said before, but that was when mother went through menopause- what a trip that was! he is soo overly sensative too, like he can say sarcastic things to you, but by god you had better not say them back! and you cannt have a straight conversation without him going oh isn't that a song...then he starts singing, which would be fine like every once in a while, but no ALL the time. i am greatful not to live with my parents for these reasons, but even when i go over for dinner i have to bite my tounge and refrain from punching my dad(not literally).
quankanne Posted January 23, 2004 Posted January 23, 2004 holy moly, Sarah! we have the same father! (frustrating, isn't it?) the only thing you can do is keep encouraging your mom because your dad will only continue to feel threatened by her successes and will "cover" those feelings by acting like a jackass. believe me, she will appreciate that support (and love) that you give her it will be hard, but you also need to have a "talk" with ol' Daddy, letting him know that you are on to his game. He might yell and scream (as mine did) about this, but in the end, he'll respect you for being straight up with him. you cannt have a straight conversation without him going oh isn't that a song...then he starts singing talk to him like a child when he acts like one -- just keep repeating what you need to say until he gets the idea that you are serious about communicating with him. he'll get the idea thoughts on the stomach thing: this sounds like a pat answer, but exercising your abdominal area is your first and best bet. the muscles tighten, as does your mid-drift.
brashgal Posted January 24, 2004 Posted January 24, 2004 I don't think your Mom has taken the 'easy way out' by submitting to major surgery. At 300 lbs and her age I am sure she had probably tried dieting, exercise with little result which is why she opted for the gastric bypass. Your father must realize this. He probably does feel threatened. Best of luck to your Mom, I hope her health continues to improve as her weight drops. It's tough to make the necessary changes to control your weight or your physical fitness level if you are not normally active or if you've had a long history of being overweight. For me, the mindset is the most important - you have to decide that improved appearance and overall health is tantamount. It's a goal you need to keep in sight constantly. It helps if you have others who truly support you. You and your Mom can work to support each other. Not sure if your stomach is due to excess weight or skin. Doing abdominal exercises and controlling your weight would be first on the list. If you do these things and you are still not satisfied with your appearance, there is always plastic surgery. Dressing to minimize your flaws can also make you feel better about yourself. Winging positive thoughts your way...you are not alone in this.
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