musky Posted May 9, 2010 Posted May 9, 2010 Hello Ladies, I need some advice as I'm feeling really torn up inside over something. I am a 34 year old man. I have a career that I really enjoy and I come from a family that are supportive and I love very much. I'm stable financially and am emotionally stable. All in all I think Im a pretty good guy....the problem I have is Im single and feeling kinda lonely. I have been single for many years and the major reason why is because I have an illness called psoriasis. I have battled this condition for 18 years now and it continues to be a really difficult thing to deal with on a day to day basis. My body is at times covered with these painful and embarassing lesions and its all I can do to hide them from the world. This makes intimacy very difficult for me and I shy away from woman which is difficult because you are all so beautiful The reality is I really want to be a husband and a father but I cant figure out how to get over my fear of exposing my skin to a woman. Im so fearful of being rejected. I meet woman all the time but the relationships dont go any further because I dont know how to let them in and have this conversation. I tend to pull away out of fear and I think woman interpret this as me not being interested. Can any woman out there please provide some feedback as to how I could approach this topic with a woman? thanks!
cartierbenjamin Posted May 9, 2010 Posted May 9, 2010 My advice is let them know about your condition, before you get intimate with them. Dont let it be the first thing you conversate about. If she is really there for you she wouldnt even mind the flaws you think you have. Let her feel comfortable with you and all the possibilities are endless.
furbaby Posted May 9, 2010 Posted May 9, 2010 (edited) This post makes me sad and I'm sorry to hear that you've had such a difficult time. It might help you to see a therapist. That might sound drastic, but it's pretty common for people to talk to a counselor about body issues. If I were you, I would seriously consider trying it. None of us are completely secure and confident in ourselves. My ex-boyfriend had serious depression and he also suffered from ED, and he was so ashamed of these things and waited a long time to tell me. But I didn't care! It made me sad that he had been so afraid to open up to me, because I really liked him and i would have continued liking him regardless of those things. If you want to feel closer to people, you need to take small steps towards opening up more. If you can be more honest with the women you're dating, that's a good start. Psoriasis might not be pretty, but it's really not that bad and at least it's not something life-threatening or contagious, you know? If you really like someone and you want to get closer to her but you feel shy, be vocal about it. Tell her that you like her, but you have a skin condition and you're not yet comfortable with other people seeing it. It's also important to accept who you are before you ask anyone else to accept you. Good luck! Edited May 9, 2010 by furbaby
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