littleka Posted May 8, 2010 Posted May 8, 2010 Hi everyone, I'm new here so I don't know if I'm posting this in the right. Feel free to redirect me if necessary. The thing is due to my circumstances it's really difficult to me to make friends. I've been living in the US as an au pair for almost two years and as an au pair I work with kids at home so I don't get to meet a lot of people. When I first moved here I met these two girls who were also au pairs and we became friends. But as time went by one of them decided to go back home to be with her boyfriend and the other one well, I realized we have nothing in common. We still hang out but I don't have a lot of fun with her. The worst is that she thinks we are the best friends ever and she is very cling. She won't leave me alone. Anyway, you get the idea. Now I see myself stuck to her because she invites me to go out and since I have no other friends I feel like I have to go. And I also feel very very lonely and I can't just stay home all weekend since I already stay home all week working. I need a break. Back in my home country life was really hard but I had a lot of friends. I always had a lot of friends now I feel horrible because I can't seem to make any new friends. I don't know what to do anymore. Can anyone offer me any support, any advice on meeting new people, making new friends?
ANJL_BEING Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 Do you go out to the movies, bars, restaurants? If not, you should. Take your friend who is "clingy" and maybe you both can make new friends together. That way, you have a bigger circle of friends, and she won't rely solely on you. Always smile and try to make conversation with people, but don't come on too strong. Tell them your story. Tell them why you are in the States. Spark their interest... Then maybe they may invite you out or get your number or vice versa.
Green Posted May 21, 2010 Posted May 21, 2010 You could read a book on making friends, Don't buy it.. just go to a library and check it out... or go to book store with chairs and read it in the store...
christiw Posted May 27, 2010 Posted May 27, 2010 Making friends is not a difficult task. Just get a habit of attending the social gatherings and adopt the extrovert outlook and then see....so many friends around you.
yume Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 If you have the time, you should find a good cause to volunteer for. I just signed up to volunteer for a Cancer awareness marathon in the hopes that I'll be able to meet people...if not, I still get the volunteer experience. You can't lose
Philber33 Posted May 28, 2010 Posted May 28, 2010 There are no steps and procedures to make friends. You can read books, chat on PC, use social websites that you can meet so many people, who you think are relatively like you, make him as your friend. Change your attitude, and everyone looks like your friend only.
cld101 Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 Just be yourself when you are looking for friends. Start hanging out, socialize. If you have good qualities then show it, don't hide it because it maybe your way in making friends....
zengirl Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 Join clubs or organizations that appeal to you. Check out Meetup.com. Since you have a clingy friend, if you're afraid to go alone, you can totally bring her along. The person who said expanding your social circle with her was a good idea was right---She might make some new friends, and you might make some new friends (Some together; some separate), and you'll both be better off. Maybe then, you'll even like her better, as she clings less. Some organizations I can think to suggest: Book clubs (there are all types, for whatever kinds you like), events clubs, fitness/sports clubs (I've joined several for people who like sports/being active but can't play them, so you don't have to be sporty). Volunteering is great for this too, as someone said! Beyond joining things, go places where you can hang out and read/chill/whatever, like coffee shops. You might see regulars. You might make friends. Just be sociable, friendly, and happy in your day to day life. Smile at people. Say hi. If this bothers anyone, that's on them; not you. Stay happy. Good luck!
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