4evrdryblueyes Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 hi everyone, first time talker here, 20 years old. my situation is thus, i was single for the first 17 years of life. then my junior year of high school this blonde bombshell transfers to my class. i instantly turned on the charm, making her my girlfriend in the next month. now, 3 years later, we're engaged, she's happy, i'm happy enough. she loves me so much, i'm not sure if i do. and i'm not sure if i do because the saying "if you love her you'd make it work" doesnt apply to me in this relationship. we've been having trouble in the relationship since the 2nd month of dating, when she cheated on me. after that was another incident i'd rather not speak of, but will tell you it would destroy other relationships. and she's clingy...been that way for about a year and a half now. with my history written, my PROBLEM is thus, i've been talking to another girl and she REALLY gets me, i mean really, likes everything i like, we can talk for hours just about what music we both like! my current fiance doesnt want anything to do with my hobbies or anything, its like pulling teeth from a lion trying to get her interested. i leave for marine boot camp in 2 weeks, as is her birthday, so do i end my bleak, unhappy relationship now? and pursue this girl that makes me stay awake at night thinking about her? or do i continue this charade? furthering hurting my fiance? she's a very fragile woman. her mom dying this past january has really messed her emotions up and she's so stressed out her family wont talk to her other than yell. so im basically all she has. i REALLY need help here, this brain of mine just buries itself in the sand.
Green Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 I was single for the first 22 years of my life. My senior year this blonde bombshell transfered to my class and she was actualy into me but I screwed that up by being to afraid to make a move... pretty much my story with every girl until the summer I graduated law school when this time things went very right with a different blonde bombshell. If there is one thing I learned its that you need to be yourself. Be the version of yourself with out fear and gently yet clearly dump your current gf and persue the girl you now like. As for the marines I recomend you back out while you still can. I respect what our armed services do but seriously do you want to take that burden on? Don't do it, you could die a violent scary death.
Author 4evrdryblueyes Posted May 7, 2010 Author Posted May 7, 2010 thanks for the quick reply green. but dont get the marines info twisted or anything. and thanks for the concern but i wont be anywhere near combat with my MOS. but i put that info up so everyone knows ill be leaving soon to get my life started. and whether or not i should go in tied down to someone like that. i forgot to mention that being engaged was something she sort of forced on me. she asked for a ring for christmas (yes she meant an engagement ring), so thats what i got her. if not she would never let me hear the end of it til she got one
Green Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 My gf asked me for a ring to, but instead of getting engaged I got her a promise ring. Look you don't feel the same way about her as you used to, are you really going to pass up the chance to be with this girl you like just because you are leaving soon. Break up and date the girl you want. I once started a relationship before I was leaving to go somewhere and it is good memories! Those good memories will be with you in the present when you are gone. Seriously do you realize how much stuff can happen in 2 weeks. Go for it dude.
Chochobong Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 Be honest with yourself and be honest with her. Don't live a lie and do NOT "go through the motions" - it isn't fair to either one of you. Do NOT begin a new relationship until you are COMPLETELY out of your current one.
Author 4evrdryblueyes Posted May 9, 2010 Author Posted May 9, 2010 well i just broke up with her this morning. thanks for the help! bye for now
Green Posted May 9, 2010 Posted May 9, 2010 It was the right thing to do considering you liked another girl. good luck
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