Dunno Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I know this sounds like I'm a junior high school kid, but I have a question. Is it appropriate for a married person to have former lovers as friends on facebook? Does it matter if they were in love for a period and are now friends or were just friends who had sex?
aeh Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I have several friends on FB who are old BF's or FWBs or people I dated. I think some of them probably bother my hubby a bit, but truly, there is no contact between us whatsoever--probably more of a curiosity thing as in seeing who they married, pics of kids, where they live. Doesn't mean a thing.
She's_NotInLove_w/Me Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 The degree to which this should bother someone is relative to so many other things in the marriage... current relationship quality, past fidelity or infidelity, If your spouse is totally transparent and allows you to view his/her facebook account at will, and/or keep the password shared, then I think you should feel pretty confident and not allow it to bother you. At the same time, I am sure there are many who will say that the internet is where they lost their spouse or infidelity began (could be facebook, or many other social/ dating sites)...
SoConfusledandHurt Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 In my personal relationship it wouldnt work out for me or him, Id be upset...and Im sure he would be too... there would be one exception...a girl he works with ( they slept together a few times before he met me and they are still friendly at work)
DaisyLeigh Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 (edited) I have an ex boyfriend AND his wife on my friends list. She is a great person. If we lived closer, we would likely be good friends. I also have a former...um...friend with benefits on my list too. He is also married. His wife does not mind at all. My husband does not mind either. I think it all depends upon the person and the situation. There are a few exes whom I would not have on my list. Edited May 6, 2010 by DaisyLeigh
califnan Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I have a friend who has only been married for three years.. He and his wife are in their 60's .. According to him, he emails to other women, and she emails to other men incl her exhusband and a former boy friend from school - and also on her facebook.. He says they are very much in love and see nothing wrong with it .. I think if I were remarried, I would not do it - nor would I want my husband to do it.. I feel that it plants a bad seed, and also represents something missing from their marriage relationship.
DaisyLeigh Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 I have a friend who has only been married for three years.. He and his wife are in their 60's .. According to him, he emails to other women, and she emails to other men incl her exhusband and a former boy friend from school - and also on her facebook.. He says they are very much in love and see nothing wrong with it .. I think if I were remarried, I would not do it - nor would I want my husband to do it.. I feel that it plants a bad seed, and also represents something missing from their marriage relationship. Having friends represents something missing from a marriage relationship? Even with the consent of all spouses? Good grief. I am not attached at the hip to my husband. I have been married for 19 years. I have never cheated nor been tempted to cheat on my husband. We have issues like any other couple, but we are happy. There is nothing "missing" here. I don't message anyone on a daily basis. I do have a life. I do see how Facebook and MySpace could tempt a person who is unhappy in their marriage, however.
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