teanoranges Posted May 4, 2010 Posted May 4, 2010 6months of it... i sort of want to talk to him. just as friends. but I also feel like I want to know what's going on with him.... I won't. I know its wrong, but feel free to tell me not to too!
NABDP Posted May 5, 2010 Posted May 5, 2010 6months of it... i sort of want to talk to him. just as friends. but I also feel like I want to know what's going on with him.... I won't. I know its wrong, but feel free to tell me not to too! Did he break up with you? If so, don't contact. If you broke up with him, and are 100% sure you were the one that told him to shove off, if you are missing him and want to see if anything is different, go ahead and contact in my opinion. However, if he left YOU, under no circumstances should you contact. Contact a new guy. Meet someone new. Don't give him the satisfaction of letting him know that you are still pining over him 6 months after he dumped you. Keep your dignity.
USMCHokie Posted May 5, 2010 Posted May 5, 2010 Teanoranges...you know that if you contact him and break NC, I will reach across the internet and slap you with a boat paddle... You've been warned...
northstar1 Posted May 5, 2010 Posted May 5, 2010 6months of it... i sort of want to talk to him. just as friends. but I also feel like I want to know what's going on with him.... I won't. I know its wrong, but feel free to tell me not to too! Ask yourself honestly, are you really looking to talk to him as friends? Can you say you are 100% over him? If not, don't contact him. I am not sure your circumstances of your breakup, but you really need to figure out what your motivation is for contact. Did you break up with him and now regret it? The reason I ask, if he broke up with you, and you contact him and he tells you he's with someone new, will that set you back? Trust me, contacting an ex, if you still are not over the, rarely has a good outcome.
Author teanoranges Posted May 5, 2010 Author Posted May 5, 2010 I would looove to be slapped with a boat paddle! haha! Definitely made my day. I don't even know why I'm thinking of breaking NC.. its not going to happen. I wouldn't know what to say, why I'd say it, or how I'd react... Silly to come here to try and see if anyone can give me a reason why I should! Yea right! No one here is dumb enough to tell me to contact a jerk! Thank G for you all keeping heads straight around here! Life is going really awesome. Just moved, landed a nice paying job, and finally have a more permanent living situation. Guess its my need to 'share' it that got me thinking of him. F that! I'm going to enjoy this and continue making awesome progress from being on my own. I no longer need to prove how independent I am to him. or anyone. I've done enough to prove I am capable of *almost* anything. ^_^ And I know it would go downhill the moment I talked to him.
GrayClouds Posted May 5, 2010 Posted May 5, 2010 What you wrote: 6months of it... i sort of want to talk to him. just as friends. but I also feel like I want to know what's going on with him.... What your really saying:I am actually feeling pretty good but I kind of miss the pain so I thinking of contacting the EX to let him know I still pine for him a bit. I am thinking he may need a ego boost at my expense. If I am really lucky he will tell me about his great new one is and why I could never hold a candle to her.You worked to hard to be this mean to yourself.
Author teanoranges Posted May 5, 2010 Author Posted May 5, 2010 You know, you are absolutely right. I'll be honest, I miss the excitement, the pain, everything that goes with that kind of dysfunctional relationship. Maybe I want to stop worrying about where I am going and focus on helping someone else climb the ladder by using my shoulders.... ... or maybe I just really want him to be jealous, and regret letting me go soo bad. and be happy for how good I am doing. Jeez, the psychology of it! The messed up way brains work, I really don't understand it. thank G for LS, seriously... I was really losing ground there...
GrayClouds Posted May 5, 2010 Posted May 5, 2010 You know, you are absolutely right. I'll be honest, I miss the excitement, the pain, everything that goes with that kind of dysfunctional relationship. That is so amazingly honest, a bit sad, and possible as loving self aware statement I have ever read. A person who is capable of that does not have to overlly be concern where they are going. ... or maybe I just really want him to be jealous, and regret letting me go soo bad. and be happy for how good I am doing. Remember the only time that will happen is when you get to the point you do not care what he thinks. Hang in there. Be kind to yourself.
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