OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 Curious. In the dynamics of dating, why do single heterosexual men have the hardest time getting dates/hooking up/getting girlfriends? Why are the odds stacked so heavily against us? Why does society spit in our face? All of the following have absolutely no trouble in the dating world: Single heterosexual women Single bi/lesbian women Single bi/gay men Transgendered Yet, it is VERY HARD for a straight guy to get ANYWHERE in the dating world. Just take a look at this forum for proof of that.
CarrieT Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 Single heterosexual women Wrong, wrong, wrong. Sure, I can get a hook-up anytime I want. But I can't get a nice guy to take me out on a simple date to get to know me without trying to get his dick in my mouth. I haven't had a date since last October with no prospects of any in the near future... Stop your whining. Everybody has difficulty and you are not alone.
marsle85 Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 I completely disagree. Single heterosexual men should have a much easier time than single hetero females. As Carrie mentioned, women are targeted for ONS, etc. Where women are much more willing to engage in a LTR. Where are you getting this?
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 Wrong, wrong, wrong. Sure, I can get a hook-up anytime I want. But I can't get a nice guy to take me out on a simple date to get to know me without trying to get his dick in my mouth. I haven't had a date since last October with no prospects of any in the near future... Stop your whining. Everybody has difficulty and you are not alone. Wrong, you can get that nice guy anytime, it's just that average looking people don't count.
Rorschach Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 I'm a firm believer that this summer when I make a little more money and have lost all this weight and am in the best shape of my life I'm going to have the women falling all over me. It's probably not true but I'm kinda grasping at straws at this point.
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 http://open.salon.com/blog/big_fat_trauma_queen/2010/01/24/online_dating_turned_me_into_a_shallow_superficial_jerk Applies to real life too. What you think: All men are jerks that want one night stands Truth: Most men are not jerks, you just don't want them
marsle85 Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 http://open.salon.com/blog/big_fat_trauma_queen/2010/01/24/online_dating_turned_me_into_a_shallow_superficial_jerk Applies to real life too. What you think: All men are jerks that want one night stands Truth: Most men are not jerks, you just don't want them I think that's true- but that link is more likely to represent a man's thinking than a woman's. This is why you see many gorgeous women with so so guys. So is the issue here you being a single, heterosexual male- or that you're less than average looking. If that's the case, work on your looks. Theoretically, a beautiful, intelligent and kind woman deserves a handsome, intelligent and kind man. Why should either party settle? Your World of Warcraft collection doesn't entitle you to anyone you want.
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 I think that's true- but that link is more likely to represent a man's thinking than a woman's. This is why you see many gorgeous women with so so guys. So is the issue here you being a single, heterosexual male- or that you're less than average looking. If that's the case, work on your looks. Theoretically, a beautiful, intelligent and kind woman deserves a handsome, intelligent and kind man. Why should either party settle? Your World of Warcraft collection doesn't entitle you to anyone you want. Another misconception, average guys are not looking for models, far from it. We are looking for our equals, the problem is our equals are out seeking above average and far above average looking guys. Those guys have no problem servicing those women with booty calls, but never a real relationship (as the blogger mentions). This leads the women to believe "all guys are jerks" And my looks are just fine (average), and my post was referring to average guys, not fat slobs.
AD1980 Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 I dont thinks its that many Men..On forums like this your gonna get guys like us who are invisible to women and want to know why.. There real isnt any real answer why except some of us arent attratcive to the oppostie sex and that will never change and all the fluff advice u get from people mean little..
CarrieT Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 Wrong, you can get that nice guy anytime, it's just that average looking people don't count. Wrong again. Of my four long-term relationships, only one of my guys was more than average looking and two of them were down-right dowdy. I would take average any day of the week, as long as he can provide interesting conversation and have similar interests. Look, OpenGL -- we know you've been trawling Craigslist for women. Heck, I look there often at the Men (and see the same posts over and over). I know that I am an anomaly when it comes to being a woman but having been single now for two years, the ONLY dates I have had have come from dating sites -- and they were all only first dates. I admit to going to sites occasionally for sex as well, but I have yet to have a guy ask me out from just general social functions (well, except for the married ones who were looking for affairs). You'd be surprised how hard it is to be a brainy, busty, apparently intimidating woman.
AD1980 Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 http://open.salon.com/blog/big_fat_trauma_queen/2010/01/24/online_dating_turned_me_into_a_shallow_superficial_jerk Aka im 47 years old and just realized i now can no longer get those hot guys im lonely and now want to settle for guys i ignored in the past She deserves to be alone
ADF Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 I think there are 2 major factors: 1) Too many men simply refuse to commit. They think they can keep having FWB and other kinds of no-strings sex well into middle age. They need to wake the heck up. Very few women over 30 or 35 are willing to have those kinds of non-relationships. 2) Too many men are totally unrealistic about who their dating pool actually consists of. Look at all the guys in their 40s and 50s who chase 20-something women who have absolutely interest in them. Meanwhile, they ignore interested available women their own age.
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 I think there are 2 major factors: 1) Too many men simply refuse to commit. They think they can keep having FWB and other kinds of no-strings sex well into middle age. They need to wake the heck up. Very few women over 30 or 35 are willing to have those kinds of non-relationships. 2) Too many men are totally unrealistic about who their dating pool actually consists of. Look at all the guys in their 40s and 50s who chase 20-something women who have absolutely interest in them. Meanwhile, they ignore interested available women their own age. See post #8
skydiveaddict Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 here's the deal:if you have a six figure income, are tall and good looking, drive a nice car then the women will be all over you. Take any one of those factors out of the equation and you are out of luck
TouchedByViolet Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 I don't understand the sexual orientation part of your thread. I have gay friends and they often struggle more than the average person in finding someone for the simple fact that the dating pool is so much smaller in the gay community.
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 here's the deal:if you have a six figure income, are tall and good looking, drive a nice car then the women will be all over you. Take any one of those factors out of the equation and you are out of luck Yep, agreed.
EasyHeart Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 1. The past 50 years have seen radical shifts in gender roles. We're still adapting to those shifts, and men are at the tail end of it. Men think "I'm hardworking, decent and reliable. Why can't I find a woman?" and women think "I'm educated, rich and successful. Why can't I find a man more educated, rich and successful than me?" 2. People are marrying later because they want careers, and there are very few places for men and women to meet once they get out of school. The basic places to meet are bars and online, both of which encourage superficial hookups and discourage people looking for serious relationships. 3. This is the first time in history that many of the people in their dating years are the product of broken homes. I think that makes it difficult for a lot of them to form relationships, ie lots of emotionally unavailable people (male and female) out there. Not only do they have difficulty forming relationships, but they mess up so many of the people that they date, that we end up with a multiplier effect, which is the bigger problem.
sweetjasmine Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 I don't understand the sexual orientation part of your thread. I have gay friends and they often struggle more than the average person in finding someone for the simple fact that the dating pool is so much smaller in the gay community. Yes, plus transgendered people have an even harder time. OP is totally out of touch with reality.
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 I don't understand the sexual orientation part of your thread. I have gay friends and they often struggle more than the average person in finding someone for the simple fact that the dating pool is so much smaller in the gay community. One night at a gay club, problem solved.
sweetjasmine Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 One night at a gay club, problem solved. So how come one night at a "straight" club hasn't solved all your problems?
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 So how come one night at a "straight" club hasn't solved all your problems? Bitchy superficial women, male/female ratio.
alphamale Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 Yet, it is VERY HARD for a straight guy to get ANYWHERE in the dating world. Just take a look at this forum for proof of that. most of the men i know are either married or dating someone
USMCHokie Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 most of the men i know are either married or dating someone Agreed...I am one of the few (perhaps the only) amongst of my friends that is single...
Author OpenGL Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 most of the men i know are either married or dating someone Given your name is alpha male, I'm sure your clique is comprised of other alpha males? If this is the case that is no surprise.
sweetjasmine Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 Wallowing in self-pity and bitterness is one of the most attractive traits a person could possibly possess. True fact, guys.
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