yume Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 (edited) I'll try to nutshell this as best as I can. My boyfriend and I work together in a drugstore, part time. There's another girl, who is his friend, that works in cosmetics. He has been working there for 10 years, me 2, and she started working there last November. Him and I started dating Oct - Dec and then it ended briefly as I was dealing with my ex. Now we're together again and I'm having issues with his friendship with this girl in cosmetics. When we were not together I felt like he was trying to replace me with this new girl - their relationship is quite similar to ours, jokey and teasing but with a nice undertone. As far as I know their relationship has developed quite a lot since then and I am having some major jealousy issues. I did bring it up with him when we first got back together that I felt he was replacing me when I was not in his life, that I have to compete with her, etc etc because he had gone out with her to get his new tattoo and did not tell me, then told me he told her we were going out (without even asking me). But, I sucked it up and I said that their relationship was none of my business so I was not going to ask about it. However, tonight I did a stupid thing. I looked at his text messages on his phone and he has quite a long series of messages from her. One message was him asking her how work was last night (saturday, where I was also incidentally working) and she replied "Good, ur gf actually talked to me lol" Ummm. I haven't seen her since he told her we were going out, which was basically a month ago, so wtf? It seems to me like she has a problem with me. I was perfectly polite (not to mention I always have been since she started working) to her when I saw her at work and again today at work...so again, where is this coming from? Secondly, why is it that he is texting her asking her how work was and yet he never asked me how work was? To be honest, it hurts a little. I'm under the impression that their relationship is a lot closer than I initially thought and that he's lying to me about it. I made a sarcastic remark to him once that his 'best friend' was working when he picked me up one time, insinuating that he should go talk to her....and then he goes "she isn't my best friend. I didn't even go and see her when I came in today." I'm just at odds with myself. I'm really pissed at the moment. Like....he texts her at length...then implies that they aren't even good friends, that they just joke around...but it's beginning to seem like its more than that. And now she has a problem with me? Its just...their relationship is almost exactly the same as mine with him....and she's similar in appearance to me (small, white, dark haired)..... So....I guess the main question is, should I talk to him about it and ask him what the hell is exactly going on? It's not like I'm paranoid that he's going to cheat on me or anything, it just really freaking BOTHERS me. I do NOT appreciate being lied to. Or should I just leave it alone and get over it? I'm just.........uncomfortable not knowing. :/ I should also mention that I've taken both him and her off of my facebook feed because I can't stand seeing their stupid wall to wall conversations that keep showing up on my news feed. It drives me nuts. Edited May 3, 2010 by yume
Maggotface Posted May 11, 2010 Posted May 11, 2010 Wow.. I think you are digging way to much into this. Is she the only female friend he has? There really is no hint that he is cheating on you or even has feelings for this girl. Does he know you dig through his phone? Is there a reason you have such trust issues? I would talk to him since it really bothers you, ask how he feels about her and tell him you have been snooping through his phone.
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