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about trouble with new love's friend


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Posted

I've been dating a wonderful guy for about 6 months, and everything is great, EXCEPT...one of his best friends, who was also a close friend of mine for a time, is awful. We were roommates for a while, and he suffered some serious setbacks in his life. He transformed into a different, angry person and became very abusive to me, at times almost physically. I moved out and we're no longer friends, but my boyfriend is still close with him (though he's said he finds his friends' behavior towards me unacceptable). I'm having trouble dealing with the fact that my s.o. is still friends with someone who treated me so terribly, who I consider to have been an abuser. How can I handle this? Should it be a deal-breaker, or is it something I need to learn to be okay with?

Posted

You really cannot demand you BF cut off ties with someone just because you and he don't get along. Try to remember that your BF's experience with this guy is probably very different from yours, and he sees him in a very different light. That said, you have every right not to see this friend if you don't want to. Make this clear to your BF, and he may begin to distance himself from this guy.

Posted
You really cannot demand you BF cut off ties with someone just because you and he don't get along. Try to remember that your BF's experience with this guy is probably very different from yours, and he sees him in a very different light. That said, you have every right not to see this friend if you don't want to. Make this clear to your BF, and he may begin to distance himself from this guy.

 

Agreed. And it sounds like he is distancing himself from this guy.

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