cmichael16 Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 Okay so pardon the venting Its been 2.5 months today since my ex walked out on me for about a month and a half we were friendly and there was hope, then it came to a point where we agreed it was too soon to try Then she begged me to be friends, I sortof agreed, but realized that it was too painful and told her, then things started getting quiet, last saturday I told her I was going no contact and that if she ever wanted to reconcile to call me but only after she had time to heal and be ready for a mature grown up relationship. I know that I cant be friends with my ex because no matter what I will always have feelings for her and if I tried to be friends I would be short changing myself and always hung up on her. I made a list of all the things I love about her, then I listed all the good and bad qualities, I still love all of her qualities other than the part that gave up on everything and left. I just want her to think one day and realize what she left, I have been repeatedly told by people that I am too good for her, I know I am smarter and stronger and I know that she may never find someone as good as me and I was to her, but I would move mountains if I knew she would one day call and say "I am so sorry for what I did, it was a terrible mistake, can you forgive me and try again" I would have to play coy, but I would definitely try, she never lied to me as far as I know so I still have a little trust in her, if she could prove that she wanted me and wasnt scared I would be with her in a heartbeat. I know I am just rambling, but it is either this or text her, and I am strong enough to stay in NC. If she is out there, god, please bring her back to me!
northstar1 Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 I hear you brother. But there is nothing that can be done but NC. She has to want to fight for it and come back on her own accord to tell you this. The natural instinct is to reach out for what is no longer there, and try and show them what they are missing,giving up on etc. She may never fully realize what she's lost, or she is not willing to fight for it.
Author cmichael16 Posted May 2, 2010 Author Posted May 2, 2010 I hear you brother. But there is nothing that can be done but NC. She has to want to fight for it and come back on her own accord to tell you this. The natural instinct is to reach out for what is no longer there, and try and show them what they are missing,giving up on etc. She may never fully realize what she's lost, or she is not willing to fight for it. Oh I know, I am not the same even, but I am crying for the first time in weeks, and I dont usually cry, this is the only person I have ever loved this much, and since I am divorced that is saying a lot. I am just lost as can be
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