justagirl09 Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 I talked to this guy who I met on an online dating site. He seems genuine but I am nervous. I havent met alot of guys in the time I have been single (1 1/2 years) that want a relationship. The one I did was a liar and just wanted to get in my pants. Anyways, all we established was that he wants to get to know me and see what happens. Were supposed to go out very soon. He asked if I lived alone which scared me because in the back of my mind I am thinking he is going to try to gain access to my apartment after the date. Second, I dont want to jump into a relationship. I want a relationship, but I want to date someone and get to know them and see if its right, and if everything is going good then make the leap. And I dont mean after a week or two or only 2 dates. How long should you date before committing and how many dates till you actually let someone come over to your house? I have either met guys that only want to date casually or are too eager to have a girlfriend.
Fouts Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 You don't sound very experienced. Just change the subject if he asks about your living arrangements. If he pursues it from there, then you need to acknowledge that red flag and walk away. Other than that, if things go well, just be open about not wanting to rush things and take things at your own speed. If that's not acceptable to him, then he's probably only looking to get a quick lay and move on anyway.
Author justagirl09 Posted May 2, 2010 Author Posted May 2, 2010 You don't sound very experienced. Just change the subject if he asks about your living arrangements. If he pursues it from there, then you need to acknowledge that red flag and walk away. Other than that, if things go well, just be open about not wanting to rush things and take things at your own speed. If that's not acceptable to him, then he's probably only looking to get a quick lay and move on anyway. Well, I was in a relationship/marriage for 10 years so prior to this, I wasnt in the dating scene for quite a while, so I suppose that is why I am coming off as inexperienced compared to some.
norajane Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 I am thinking he is going to try to gain access to my apartment after the date. Meet him in public, and leave him there at the end of the date. There's no reason you have to bring him anywhere near your place. How long should you date before committing and how many dates till you actually let someone come over to your house? As long as it takes for you to feel comfortable. There are no rules.
Author justagirl09 Posted May 2, 2010 Author Posted May 2, 2010 Meet him in public, and leave him there at the end of the date. There's no reason you have to bring him anywhere near your place. Thanks, I know guys try to be sly and look like a good guy by giving you a ride home and/or picking you up.
norajane Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 Thanks, I know guys try to be sly and look like a good guy by giving you a ride home and/or picking you up. Learn how to say "no, thank you".
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