undisclosed Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 Hi all, BF broke broke up with me less than 3 weeks before my birthday & didn't wish me a happy birthday (we were supposed to be in a cooling off period in which he said texting was okay, but not everyday). So it was supposed to be an amicable period, but after he ignored one of my texts the week of my bday (it wasn't a question, but whatever). So since that ignored text and bday, I've been in no contact for almost 3 weeks now. In that time he has sent me 2 texts, one asking how school is going & the other just said "hey" (wtf), and one call after the first text. Its been days since the last text and now I'm fighting texting him back. I want to so badly!...O noooo! i want to send something very short and brief and see where it goes. nothing about missing him or wanting to get back together. I've asked similar questions & everyone advises no! But right now I'm really fighting the urge! o no! should I just learn the hard way or continue as I am?
djentleman Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 If you have any sense of strength as a human being, you will not break NC. DO NOT BREAK NC. If anybody here can do it, so can you.
stillafool Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 He broke up with you and is not responding to you. He is trying to move away from you, just let him go. Do not break NC. Try to get interested in another guy.
velouria123 Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 Hi all, BF broke broke up with me less than 3 weeks before my birthday & didn't wish me a happy birthday (we were supposed to be in a cooling off period in which he said texting was okay, but not everyday). So it was supposed to be an amicable period, but after he ignored one of my texts the week of my bday (it wasn't a question, but whatever). So since that ignored text and bday, I've been in no contact for almost 3 weeks now. In that time he has sent me 2 texts, one asking how school is going & the other just said "hey" (wtf), and one call after the first text. Its been days since the last text and now I'm fighting texting him back. I want to so badly!...O noooo! i want to send something very short and brief and see where it goes. nothing about missing him or wanting to get back together. I've asked similar questions & everyone advises no! But right now I'm really fighting the urge! o no! should I just learn the hard way or continue as I am? I speak with confidence that you doing so will hurt your cause. We tend to believe that somehow a revelation will be obtained, but this rarely happens darling. I did it, and it set me back immensily. It will be no different for you I promise. Just perservere. This experience may embitter you initially, but empower you in the end. I hadn't spoke with mine in two months and she texted me to drop stuff off at my house. I texted her to drop it off on my doorstep and even that little bit of contact saddened me. Keep your head up and focus on the present. You will be just fine! I promise
northstar1 Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 I speak with confidence that you doing so will hurt your cause. We tend to believe that somehow a revelation will be obtained, but this rarely happens darling. I did it, and it set me back immensily. It will be no different for you I promise. Just perservere. This experience may embitter you initially, but empower you in the end. I hadn't spoke with mine in two months and she texted me to drop stuff off at my house. I texted her to drop it off on my doorstep and even that little bit of contact saddened me. Keep your head up and focus on the present. You will be just fine! I promise This is solid advice. If someone has broken up with you, or hasn't reached out to tell you the regret and made a mistake, you have to try and leave it be. Giving into the urge to contact to feel better is like fighting withdrawal from a drug. You justify that reaching out will have an impact and make you feel better. But in most cases it is exactly the opposite. By contacting them, you feel better for a very short period, then anxiety usually sets in while you wait for a reply. And in more cases then not, you will either be met with silence or a neutral reply that makes you feel awful. Rarely will you receive what you need from them. It's best to fight the urge and carryon with out talking. Cliche, but if they truly believe they made a mistake, they will fight to get youback. Otherwise, you are chasing a ghost
Author undisclosed Posted May 3, 2010 Author Posted May 3, 2010 He called me this morning and we had a pleasant short conversation. He said his reason for calling was to apologize for not calling on my birthday (It was a personal issue and very legitimate). I ended the conversation pretty quickly, but he added in that he still had some of my stuff and to call him for it. I told him to just give me a call, as in to set up a date that's good for him. To be honest I don't even care about that stuff, but I still love him and do want to see him. However, I didn't get too exited about this being a sign of reconciliation and I'm going to continue to work on moving on. But, it was a very nice move on his part and I'm wondering if I should just send him a quick email thanking him again to let him know I appreciate that he did that and to let him know that I hope everything goes well with the problem. I said thank you over the phone, but I kinda rambled a little bit about school and did express best wishes, but I felt like I didn't really express my appreciation for his move very much. I feel okay, but gosh, now I think I'm just over analyzing. So should I send the short email or just let it go and if he calls okay and if he doesn't oh well??
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