flsurfkarma Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 The Tuesday after Easter my wife dropped a bombshell on me. She told me that she wasn't in love with me anymore and that she hadn't felt that way towards me for about 4 months. I asked if she wanted a divorce and she told me she didn't know. We still live in the same house and sleep in the same bed. I just have no idea what the hell is going on sometimes. It feels like a roller-coaster with her. Some days are great and then others are horrible. So my mom suggested I watch fireproof and try the love dare. I am now going on my 6th day. I just wanted to know if anyone else had tried it yet. I am logging my progress on a blog I created.
Author flsurfkarma Posted May 1, 2010 Author Posted May 1, 2010 I also meant to tell you guys that she still sleeps in the same bed and still gives up the booty on a somewhat regular basis. So I have no idea what to say LOL
Toodamnpragmatic Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 of Fireproof and it was funded by a Christian organization if not mistaken. Stars Kirk Cameron (Growing Pains fame). I have read people who swear by it (check imdb for more info), but am sorry once I hear religion I turn off, which is just me. I respect religions and faith, just also have issues with them. Thus I refuse to accept anything said or testimonials.... Heck it is just a movie, isn't it???? As for still sleeping with you.... I find it a real cunnundrum and you should insist on counselling....
CarrieT Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 I also meant to tell you guys that she still sleeps in the same bed and still gives up the booty on a somewhat regular basis. So I have no idea what to say LOL I have no idea what Fireproof of Love Dare is, but why would you want to have sex with a woman who has indicated that she isn't in love with you? Okay, that was a stupid question -- except that you are married and ostensibly "in love" yet there has been an expression of disatisfaction, yet you "still want booty?"
Iconoclast Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 She told me that she wasn't in love with me anymore and that she hadn't felt that way towards me for about 4 months. It feels like a roller-coaster with her. Some days are great and then others are horrible. Based upon your other thread and the above, this fits the pattern of an affair. RED FLAGS. Time to start snooping. Do not give yourself away though, play it cool and see if you discover real evidence. If you find anything. Come back here and let the experienced members help you form a plan, because you'll probably be in trauma and make bad descisions that will just increase your suffering.
Author flsurfkarma Posted May 1, 2010 Author Posted May 1, 2010 I don't see anything that indicates an affair. I check her facebook, myspace, her phone, computer everything. I haven't seen anything. The only time we are apart is when she works at the hospital which is the weekend at nights. I have been thinking of just stopping in to see how things are going there and to make sure I don't see anything out of the ordinary.
Iconoclast Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 I would avoid just dropping her work by if it is not something you usually do, she'll know you're snooping. Perhaps you have a friend or acquaintance who could keep an eye open for you. Hire a PI if you are of means. You're halfway to divorce now, what have you got to lose, dig deeper. But in the meanwhile, be a really good husband, show her what a good relationship with you can be.
taiko Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 of Fireproof and it was funded by a Christian organization if not mistaken. Stars Kirk Cameron (Growing Pains fame). I have read people who swear by it (check imdb for more info), but am sorry once I hear religion I turn off, which is just me. I respect religions and faith, just also have issues with them. Thus I refuse to accept anything said or testimonials.... Heck it is just a movie, isn't it???? As for still sleeping with you.... I find it a real cunnundrum and you should insist on counselling.... It was made by the media ministry of the Sherwood Baptist Church which earlier made the critically acclaimed, Ebert liked it, Facing The Giants about the turn around of a Christian High School football team. Like the Sherwood Church's first two movies the actors were amateur church members and Kirk Cameron signed on with them for Fireproof.
LucreziaBorgia Posted May 2, 2010 Posted May 2, 2010 There is no harm in trying the Love Dare, IMO. I've flipped through it at work to see what it is all about (I work in a bookstore). I think there is something going on that you don't know about, that is for sure. Her reactions to your attempts will make things more clear with time.
Samantha0905 Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 (edited) I'm a Christian and am beyond glad I am. That being said, this movie about did me in with the bad acting and hokeyness of it all..... Some people seem to have loved it, however, and benefited from it a lot. The actual concept of "The Love Dare" doesn't offend me at all. I think it has merit. I hope you do well with it and let us know of your progress. Perhaps you should start a "Love Dare" thread and let us know your experiences as you journey through it. I would be interested in following. And no to the snooping. Good grief. I think you should place your trust where it belongs as a Christian and continue with the Love Dare. Stop checking her stuff -- facebook, myspace, phone, computer. Marriage shouldn't feel like prison. Whatever happened to privacy? I'm glad you still listen to your mother. Edited May 3, 2010 by Samantha0905
Luv2dance Posted May 3, 2010 Posted May 3, 2010 I agree with Samantha!! I think the Love Dare has great possibilities of helping a marriage in trouble. The movie was less than oscar worthy however the concept was good. I have also heard good things about the cd's or books Light her fire & Light his fire. As far as you still having sex, I see that as a good thing b/c at least she isn't totally turned off by you. I am sure it is not easy knowing that she doesn't share your feelings, but everyone says you can get them back!
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